getting impatient, but I rest my case... kinda ranty, but I need help

[Stinkweed]

Why do I look so terribly out of shape? I mean, you might say "get off your butt and go to the gym and stop eating trash", but what do you think I've been doing for the last 5-6 months? Every single week it's the same, I go to the gym, and it's like I'm perpetually sore (today I'm sore all over. For some reason my upper body's still a bit sore from monday, and since I did lower body yesterday, my legs are sore as hell that I can't even sit like a normal person, I just let myself fall on the chair). But do I look any better than when I started? Heck no! Am I at least any stronger? Again, no! I eat like a pig. I mean, I'm about to have another meal, but do you think I want to? Do you think I want to eat? I'd much rather just sit at home. But I do it for the sake of progress, but it's so damn annoying when there is no progress and it's like everything I do is in vain. And it's not like I wish I were like a body builder or something like that, but I at least would like to be noticeably larger/stronger than average. I don't want anything unattainable (heck I see people who go to my college, a very strict full-of-nerds-college, and they look in SO much better shape than I do).

Initially I didn't even wanna be "large" or anything. I just wanted to be normal. But no matter how much cardio I did, I still look terrible with lots of flab that I can only wear extra baggy clothes and I look like a sick person. So I started to lift, and I can't say I see much improvement, so I guess I might as well stop lifting altogether, since being sore every single freakin day brings no joy at all, especially if I'm not getting stronger. I mean, you know what they say "no pain, no gain." But having the "pain" but no "gains" at all... You'd have to be a masochist to put up with that and not complain. I need help. I mean, I don't think it is what I'm eating. I mean, if it is, then I've no clue about what the heck I should be eating then... I've been told that I need to change my routine more often. But will that make such a significant difference? I doubt it. Plus, I'm running out of ideas and don't know what to change my routine into anymore... "ask at bodybuilding.com" Yeah, but those people didn't help at all even though I posted a bunch of times. man I feel like giving up. Advice would be greatly appreciated. Thanks in advance.

[Beec]

I think your rant is not going to help anyone give you suggestions.

Somebody who knew what they were doing working out and eating to make soem gains would need to know what you were doing in order to suggest things that you might try.

It also might be how you are looking at you, not how others see you.

[arwen]

Originally Posted by Beec

It also might be how you are looking at you, not how others see you.

I agree. I had anorexia in the past and even if people tell me I am still the slimmest person they know I feel like a pig most of the time. What I see is not what they see. What do others say about your shape, like a sibling or parents or a good friend?

If you were living close I'd drag you to capoeira. Then you'd focus on the sport/game and not the physical aim of it. I have told you before that you probably feel more motivated if you are in an actual sport, not just gym

[Stinkweed]

Originally Posted by arwen

I agree. I had anorexia in the past and even if people tell me I am still the slimmest person they know I feel like a pig most of the time.

Well, I seriously doubt I've got anorexia. I mean, come on, I've pretty much got manboobs, and my butt hangs there so that I've got to wear pants 2 sizes larger in the waist than my actual waist because other wise it'd e way too tight that I couldn't even walk right. I'm talking about something real here. I'm probably like 30% body fat, even though I was told that I shouldn't lose any more weight by my doctor. As for what my family says, well they've pretty much told me I looked alright ever since I was 210lbs (however, I was told by a doctor, back then, right in front of them, and also by a gym teacher during a physical examination, that my bmi was too high).

I just don't know what to do. I don't like any sports. In fact, I could be practicing any sport in the world, and if the same thing were happening (I've tried several sports over the years, and whenever I hit a point where I didn't progress, I'd just give up), I'd still be feeling bummed out and just tired and willing to give it up. It's the lack of progress that's killing me. I mean, every day it's the same thing, eating every meal with mathematical precision, working out... I feel like saying "to hell with it" and just start eating whenever I feel like it instead of 6 meals a day.

I mean, it just seems like something anybody could easily accomplish if they find the time to do it, but just like with everything else, it is me that can't do it, and it makes me feel so inferior that, for example, some dudes in a jail get so strong (even though they eat jailfood and are well isolated from society) and me, out here, asking people over the net and doing research, going to nutritionists, etc, can't do it. I don't know what to tell you.

[RelaxByWater84]

Maybe you could try a personal trainer??

[Beec]

Well, you are doing this only to get results. So, that's one thing. If you do it because you like it, and rsults are fine, then that's great.

Second, I'd need to know more. if you want to add mass, that take s a long time for some. It took me ages until I hit my late 20s. And after I had added a bunch in hgih school, I lost 20 pounds my first two months of college. Dishearterning.

I don't think the size of your rear is a sign of you being fat.

[arwen]

Originally Posted by Beec

I think your rant is not going to help anyone give you suggestions.

Somebody who knew what they were doing working out and eating to make soem gains would need to know what you were doing in order to suggest things that you might try.

It also might be how you are looking at you, not how others see you.

Originally Posted by Stinkweed

Well, I seriously doubt I've got anorexia. I mean, come on, I've pretty much got manboobs, and my butt hangs there so that I've got to wear pants 2 sizes larger in the waist than my actual waist because other wise it'd e way too tight that I couldn't even walk right. I'm talking about something real here. I'm probably like 30% body fat, even though I was told that I shouldn't lose any more weight by my doctor. As for what my family says, well they've pretty much told me I looked alright ever since I was 210lbs (however, I was told by a doctor, back then, right in front of them, and also by a gym teacher during a physical examination, that my bmi was too high).

I just don't know what to do. I don't like any sports. In fact, I could be practicing any sport in the world, and if the same thing were happening (I've tried several sports over the years, and whenever I hit a point where I didn't progress, I'd just give up), I'd still be feeling bummed out and just tired and willing to give it up. It's the lack of progress that's killing me. I mean, every day it's the same thing, eating every meal with mathematical precision, working out... I feel like saying "to hell with it" and just start eating whenever I feel like it instead of 6 meals a day.

I mean, it just seems like something anybody could easily accomplish if they find the time to do it, but just like with everything else, it is me that can't do it, and it makes me feel so inferior that, for example, some dudes in a jail get so strong (even though they eat jailfood and are well isolated from society) and me, out here, asking people over the net and doing research, going to nutritionists, etc, can't do it. I don't know what to tell you.

I am not saying you have an ED, I am just explaining how perception can differ from reality. I find it hard to advise you, because you seem to be at a point where you have lost motivation. That is why I suggest a change of sports. You say you don't like sports, but have you ever actually tried martial arts? Would you be able to have a personal trainer at the gym, who can advise you (it usually costs money)? Someone to train with (a buddy with the same issue, so you can motivate each other)? I hope you will feel better about yourself in the future. I am sure you are a much greater guy than you think.


Arwen

[Stinkweed]

Originally Posted by Beec

I don't think the size of your rear is a sign of you being fat.

Well, if it's hanging like a bunch of flab, I think it is, man. It's not muscular, that's for sure.

Anyway, man, I was thinking maybe it's time to get some of them supplements or something? I mean, up until now, the closest thing to a supplement that I've been taking is this "protein shake" which isn't really that, it's this low-carb 17g of protein shake. I mean, it's different from those "peanut butter-flavored" protein shakes that have "whey protein" and carbs that tons of lifters use... For the rest, I just eat protein with every meal (I eat meats, beans, chicken, fish, etc) because, well, I guess I it better to go for the natural thing, but if getting a real protein shake will change things, then I'll give it a try...

Originally Posted by Beec

Second, I'd need to know more. if you want to add mass, that take s a long time for some. It took me ages until I hit my late 20s. And after I had added a bunch in hgih school, I lost 20 pounds my first two months of college. Dishearterning.

Are you telling me that it was easier when you were OLDER? I always thought that the younger, the easier it'd be (except when you're like 15-17, when you're not quite done with puberty). I mean, I'm almost 20 years old, so I thought it'd be a piece of cake, man, especially since my brother, when he lifted back when he was like 17, could military press like 210lbs after only like 4 months of training. Heh, I guess it doesn't quite run in the family, then...

I would like to add mass, I guess. I mean, I can't even do a complete set of dumbbell bicep curls with 30lbs (I can only do like 3 reps. pitiful, I know), and I've been trying to push myself further, but I just can't get past that, especially with my left arm that just get's stuck. I mean, my right arm has been ready to move on to a bigger weight ever since like 3 months ago. But my left arm, even though I try several exercises with different muscles that supposedly assist in that motion, just won't get stronger.

I'm going to write out all the details I can think of. If you don't mind, I'll pm you, Beec (if by any chance you're not here anymore). Thanks and best wishes.

[Stinkweed]

Originally Posted by arwen

You say you don't like sports, but have you ever actually tried martial arts?

Oh yeah, I don't like martial arts at all. I've tried those before, but same thing happened. I got stuck against a wall, and, heck, the instructor wouldn't even teach me anything new.

Originally Posted by arwen

Would you be able to have a personal trainer at the gym, who can advise you (it usually costs money)? Someone to train with (a buddy with the same issue, so you can motivate each other)?

I don't have any buddies, and yeah, personal trainers do indeed cost money. A lot of money (I've actually checked out those in my area, and they do not work for cheap at all).

Ok, is taking a protein shake a bad idea?

[Beec]

When I was 17 or 18, and Iw as trying to add muscle to play football, I supplemented about 80 grams of protein a day in various forms. If you do this, you need to drink lots of water, so you pee all the time. I could gain a couple pounds a month. When I was 27 or so, I could gain a pound or two a month of muscle mass, without supplmenting as much. If I did a bunch of cardio, I would not gain at all. I could ride 200 miles a week on a bike, and I did not add muscle, but I also never really got tid of the bit of gut I had. It would get to a certian level and stop, even when my body was in great shape. I used to at times be able to blow my entire cycling club away on a bike that cost a fraction of what many of theirs did and weighed more. While I enjoyed the progress, i also loved to ride.

If I want to lose weight, low carb just takes it off. Even now, but I don't stick to it. And it only gets so far.

If you really want to look a certain way, you need to stick to it, and I know that is your dilemna.