My father's eating habits have gone from annoying to disgusting, what do I do?

Box Diver · 05-01-2007, 08:37 PM

The title is simply a summary of this post....which I'll make as short as possible.

Let's start this off by saying my dad does most of the things around the house including working full-time. He works his tail off....makes twice as much as my mom, etc.He works 6-2, comes home, cleans a bit, and makes dinner everynight. This is because my mom works 10-6....and obviously she can't cook dinner.

He's only 51...so he's not old.

His eating habits...and other habits in general....are simply disgusting. I can't take them anymore.He chews with his mouth open most of the time. He makes grunts and other disgusting noises while he is eating. I never used to notice it.

My little sister has a big mouth....and a month ago blurted out, "Dad, you really need to close your mouth when you chew, because I'm going to throw up." He didn't say anything. I felt bad for him. My mom won't say anything.

Yesterday was the climax. I got off work late...so I ate alone. I'm sitting at the dinner table by myself. My dad was in the room....all of a sudden makes this disgusting "haucking" noise (spelling). You know, Haucking a loogie? Goes in the bathroom, and spits it out. I honestly was not able to finish my dinner I was so disgusted.

What do I do?

I know my mom can't stand it....my sister obviously can't either.

Dinner is honestly uncomfortable. I love my dad...respect him, etc. but I can't enjoy my dinner when he is around. I constantly lose my appetite.

Why wouldn't I say anything? Because he is the reason we live in such a nice house. He is the reason dinner is on the table everynight. He would do anything for the family.

What do I do? Please help.

simply complicated · 05-01-2007, 08:55 PM

Hey diver.
I had the same problem with my dad, with the burping and the smell of smoke at the dinner table, was no fun.
I know what you mean, by not having the heart to tell him, my sister brother and I had brought it up to my mother, who eventually told him to stop smoking in the house and quite burping at the table, he eventually listened.
So when in doubt, get your mom to do it..

**Hope75** · 05-01-2007, 08:58 PM

Wow... your dad sounds like a really stand up guy- a good father and a true renaissance man who does not only work a full time job and take care of his family, but also cooks and cleans. You are a lucky family.

Is this something you can grit your teeth and overlook?

Seems to me that he's a great guy and loves you all very much. Your sister already mentioned something to him and nothing happened. I wonder if further comments would only continue to hurt his feelings and get you nowhere.

Blue Skittles · 05-01-2007, 09:01 PM

My dad used to walk around in his underwear all the time. It was really embarassing. one day i invited three of my friends over sure enough there walks in my dad in his briefs so I made a really loud exclamation "Dad, when are you going to quit walking around in your underwear we have company for God's sakes!!" Yeah that pretty much turned things around.

sophie274 · 05-01-2007, 09:04 PM

I wouldn't say anything in front of company: that would be mortifying for your dad.

I would grit my teeth and let it go. My grandfather slurps his coffee. It drives me nuts. But I don't want to hurt his feelings, so I don't say anything. Chances are you do something that drives him up the wall to; now that your sister said something to him and nothing changed, I think it's time to take a deep breath and shake it off when it happens.

BTW, I totally sympathize. Seeing food in someone's mouth makes me want to gag! Sit next to him, not across from him at the table, if that helps.

AwdreeHpburn · 05-01-2007, 09:26 PM

my husband makes that noise too....he NEVER blows his nose like most people do...he just makes that noise. I'm waiting for our kids to get old enough to get annoyed by it. So.... I know what you mean. I've totally learned to live with it.

Is there any way you can thank him for making dinner but tell him you have some homework to do so you'll be eating in your room?

Make conversation so you'll be too preoccupied with the topic to notice. Ask if you can have a radio on. Eat whilst you watch the television.

OR - make peace with it, accept him for who he is..... the good AND the annoying and try not to let it get to you.

Box Diver · 05-02-2007, 05:31 PM

Thanks for the advice so far.

Guys/Gals.....

It's driving me up the wall. I really can't take it anymore. I'm not exagerrating, everytime I eat with him, I lose my appetite. It happened again last night at dinner. Chewing with his mouth open, swallowing obnoxiously. When he drinks from a glass he always makes this "sucking" noise.

Again, it's not me...not only because I know other people at dinner notice it....other people at dinner don't do it.

I actually feel bad now for yelling at my sister for criticizing his eating habits...though she was mean about it.

But like I said, I have to do something...but I'm afraid to say anything. My meals continue to be ruined.....and my appetite continues to be lost.

Sweet Buttabean Jellayroll · 05-02-2007, 05:49 PM

im sorry but what is the problem...he eats with his mouth open......???? i do also, i be smackin on that chicken and talkin at the same time...but if it boters yu than u should pull him to the side and politely tell him

"hey you know i think you should watch the way you eat we can see whats in your mouth"

if it dosent work then start walking away from himm whe he eats....

05-01-2007, 08:37 PM	#1
Box Diver Offline Member Join Date: Nov 2006 Posts: 39	My father's eating habits have gone from annoying to disgusting, what do I do? The title is simply a summary of this post....which I'll make as short as possible. Let's start this off by saying my dad does most of the things around the house including working full-time. He works his tail off....makes twice as much as my mom, etc.He works 6-2, comes home, cleans a bit, and makes dinner everynight. This is because my mom works 10-6....and obviously she can't cook dinner. He's only 51...so he's not old. His eating habits...and other habits in general....are simply disgusting. I can't take them anymore.He chews with his mouth open most of the time. He makes grunts and other disgusting noises while he is eating. I never used to notice it. My little sister has a big mouth....and a month ago blurted out, "Dad, you really need to close your mouth when you chew, because I'm going to throw up." He didn't say anything. I felt bad for him. My mom won't say anything. Yesterday was the climax. I got off work late...so I ate alone. I'm sitting at the dinner table by myself. My dad was in the room....all of a sudden makes this disgusting "haucking" noise (spelling). You know, Haucking a loogie? Goes in the bathroom, and spits it out. I honestly was not able to finish my dinner I was so disgusted. What do I do? I know my mom can't stand it....my sister obviously can't either. Dinner is honestly uncomfortable. I love my dad...respect him, etc. but I can't enjoy my dinner when he is around. I constantly lose my appetite. Why wouldn't I say anything? Because he is the reason we live in such a nice house. He is the reason dinner is on the table everynight. He would do anything for the family. What do I do? Please help.

05-01-2007, 08:58 PM	#3
Hope75 Offline Super Moderator Join Date: Dec 2004 Location: kitteh ville Gender: Female Age: 33 Posts: 12,512	Wow... your dad sounds like a really stand up guy- a good father and a true renaissance man who does not only work a full time job and take care of his family, but also cooks and cleans. You are a lucky family. Is this something you can grit your teeth and overlook? Seems to me that he's a great guy and loves you all very much. Your sister already mentioned something to him and nothing happened. I wonder if further comments would only continue to hurt his feelings and get you nowhere. __________________ Muffin cats need love too. Please refer to the forum rules before posting: http://www.enotalone.com/forum/forum-rules.php Mama to a beautiful baby girl born 6-25-09. :)

05-01-2007, 09:26 PM	#6
AwdreeHpburn Offline Platinum Member Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: Tiffany's Gender: Female Age: 37 Posts: 4,639	my husband makes that noise too....he NEVER blows his nose like most people do...he just makes that noise. I'm waiting for our kids to get old enough to get annoyed by it. So.... I know what you mean. I've totally learned to live with it. Is there any way you can thank him for making dinner but tell him you have some homework to do so you'll be eating in your room? Make conversation so you'll be too preoccupied with the topic to notice. Ask if you can have a radio on. Eat whilst you watch the television. OR - make peace with it, accept him for who he is..... the good AND the annoying and try not to let it get to you. __________________ What i really meant to say, is that I'm sorry for the way I am......

05-01-2007, 08:55 PM	#2
simply complicated Offline Gold Member Join Date: Aug 2003 Gender: None Specified Age: 25 Posts: 954	Hey diver. I had the same problem with my dad, with the burping and the smell of smoke at the dinner table, was no fun. I know what you mean, by not having the heart to tell him, my sister brother and I had brought it up to my mother, who eventually told him to stop smoking in the house and quite burping at the table, he eventually listened. So when in doubt, get your mom to do it..

05-01-2007, 09:01 PM	#4
Blue Skittles Offline Gold Member Join Date: Mar 2004 Location: Canada Age: 26 Posts: 1,091	My dad used to walk around in his underwear all the time. It was really embarassing. one day i invited three of my friends over sure enough there walks in my dad in his briefs so I made a really loud exclamation "Dad, when are you going to quit walking around in your underwear we have company for God's sakes!!" Yeah that pretty much turned things around.

05-01-2007, 09:04 PM	#5
sophie274 Offline Platinum Member Join Date: Mar 2006 Posts: 2,062	I wouldn't say anything in front of company: that would be mortifying for your dad. I would grit my teeth and let it go. My grandfather slurps his coffee. It drives me nuts. But I don't want to hurt his feelings, so I don't say anything. Chances are you do something that drives him up the wall to; now that your sister said something to him and nothing changed, I think it's time to take a deep breath and shake it off when it happens. BTW, I totally sympathize. Seeing food in someone's mouth makes me want to gag! Sit next to him, not across from him at the table, if that helps.

05-02-2007, 05:31 PM	#7
Box Diver Offline Member Join Date: Nov 2006 Posts: 39	Thanks for the advice so far. Guys/Gals..... It's driving me up the wall. I really can't take it anymore. I'm not exagerrating, everytime I eat with him, I lose my appetite. It happened again last night at dinner. Chewing with his mouth open, swallowing obnoxiously. When he drinks from a glass he always makes this "sucking" noise. Again, it's not me...not only because I know other people at dinner notice it....other people at dinner don't do it. I actually feel bad now for yelling at my sister for criticizing his eating habits...though she was mean about it. But like I said, I have to do something...but I'm afraid to say anything. My meals continue to be ruined.....and my appetite continues to be lost.

05-02-2007, 05:49 PM	#8
Sweet Buttabean Jellayroll Offline Join Date: Mar 2007 Location: ...Super Bowl 43... Gender: Male Posts: 3,075	im sorry but what is the problem...he eats with his mouth open......???? i do also, i be smackin on that chicken and talkin at the same time...but if it boters yu than u should pull him to the side and politely tell him "hey you know i think you should watch the way you eat we can see whats in your mouth" if it dosent work then start walking away from himm whe he eats....