I am 22 years old and i have been recently seeing a girl who was my best friend for the last 2 years, we have been friends though for 8 years. The problem is that besides making out with me from time to time she wont do anything else with me at all. I am trying to be patient about the whole situation ( I came into the relationship knowing that it takes her along time to be comfortable with people sexually) but after three months I feel like I'm going to explode. I have always been a pretty sexual person, and I have always had my sexual needs met by the people I have either dated or hooked up with, but they have never met cerebral or emotional needs. With this girl originally those my emotional and cerebral need were being met, and I was willing to understand, joke about, and go through the slow process of being sexually satisfied with her. It just seems now though that the process is completely going backward, she does less now than when we started. I really love her, but I am starting to become really passive aggressive and moody. I have never been an insecure person in fact I was completely the opposite, but this is really doing a number on me. I bartend and I am complete surrounded by tons of girls who I could easily have sex with, but I don't want any of them, just her, but it seems that she just uses me as a support system for herself. I don't want to come off as a jerk pressuring her to be more physical with me, but at the same time I dont know if I can take this much longer. Sometimes I find myself really depressed because of the situation or very really angry, I keep all of it in because i don't want her to feel pressured.
Bottling this in though sometimes makes me so frustrated though that I just need to get away and leave sometimes. We sleep in the same bed a lot of nights and I am so tired of her moving my hands away from anywhere that i touch her that I spend most of the night curled up in the fetal position facing the wall so I can stop thinking about it. I have recently turned to bitting myself really hard so that way the pain of that takes away from the insane amounts of sexual frustration and anxiety I feel. She tells me that she finds me very attractive, and from time to time she is somewhat aggressive with me but its always at times when i can't take advantage of the oppertunity. I.E. when I am working or 10 minutes before I have to leave to go somewhere, and then jokes with me about how I should have taken advantage of the situation. The worst part is, is that my sexual frustration is affecting me so much that I am also losing my ability to enjoy all the good stuff about our relationship. Some body please help me Im actually going insane I dont want to cheat at all. I just am so confused, angry, upset, and overwhelmed.