Should I Be Afraid?

Khollest · 03-12-2007, 11:18 PM

I was just diagnosed with generalized anxiety disorder and something that has to do with fluctuating mood swings with a dash of suicidality.

I was given several options and I took the chemical route since I can’t talk to people.

I got home and I stared at the box I had been given for nearly an hour.

I opened the box and put the tray on the desk, I stared at them for another 20 minutes.

All the time wodnering, will this change who I am? Will I be a different person? Will I change so much that I won’t know who that other person was? Will I be disconnected from me? The box warns that in teens this may cause an increase in suicidality, will I think about it more? Will the people around me know me if I change? Who will I be if I change? Do I dislike this feeling so much that I will change myself, me, into another person? How will you know?

I took the pill.

Have I just taken the first step in killing me, who I am? One day, I will be dead, buried underneath these chemicals. Will I have then committed suicide?

I understand if you want to move this to another section but, I thought it worked better under the mind/body/soul style.

HellFrost666 · 03-12-2007, 11:23 PM

Head meds are unpredictable... Some people have great success with them, others do not.

I also have problems with anxiety. Unlike you I have fought mine without medication despite the urging of some to medicate.

I wouldn't say taking one pill is the "first step to killing" anything. If you don't like the results you see just stop taking them and explore other types of treatment.

Khollest · 03-13-2007, 09:23 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by HellFrost666

Unlike you I have fought mine without medication despite the urging of some to medicate.

I know you didn't mean offence in that but, I took a little anyway. Its not like I just up and decided that I needed meds, I pretty much knew there was somthing not-right with me. I delt with it as best as I could for about 2 years now. Its getting heavier, I needed to deal. In fact, I am a strong anti-drug person, it bothers me how we have a pill of revery last d*mned thing. I stay away from pain killer even if I have a crippling head-ache. The only thing I really take is antiacids.

Thanks for the response.

itsallgrand · 03-13-2007, 10:20 AM

Khollest,

Honestly, friend, it sounds like the anxiety is 'talking' big time.

I understand why you would be scared and anxious about trying the meds. Meds scare me too.

But you know what? Good for you for trying something! You went and spoke with somebody. You are working to address the problem. You obviously feel it so very difficult to speak with people that it is almost like a non-option as a treatment right now.

So try to relax and to give the meds a shot.

I strongly believe you are not killing a part of yourself! Like Hellfrost mentioned, it is hard to know how meds will work from person to person.
If they don't seem to work for you, you can look to stopping the treatment.

But what if they do help! And you then find yourself more able to talk, and work on other means of dealing with your anxiety. Wouldn't that be great, eh!

Give them some time. I hope it works out for you.

HellFrost666 · 03-13-2007, 09:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Khollest

I know you didn't mean offence in that but, I took a little anyway. Its not like I just up and decided that I needed meds, I pretty much knew there was somthing not-right with me. I delt with it as best as I could for about 2 years now. Its getting heavier, I needed to deal. In fact, I am a strong anti-drug person, it bothers me how we have a pill of revery last d*mned thing. I stay away from pain killer even if I have a crippling head-ache. The only thing I really take is antiacids.

Thanks for the response.

I just saw your post. I didn't mean it the way you took it. I am sorry I offended you.

Good luck with all of this.

03-12-2007, 11:18 PM	#1
Khollest Offline Member Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: South Minneapolis Gender: Male Age: 25 Posts: 88	Should I Be Afraid? I was just diagnosed with generalized anxiety disorder and something that has to do with fluctuating mood swings with a dash of suicidality. I was given several options and I took the chemical route since I can’t talk to people. I got home and I stared at the box I had been given for nearly an hour. I opened the box and put the tray on the desk, I stared at them for another 20 minutes. All the time wodnering, will this change who I am? Will I be a different person? Will I change so much that I won’t know who that other person was? Will I be disconnected from me? The box warns that in teens this may cause an increase in suicidality, will I think about it more? Will the people around me know me if I change? Who will I be if I change? Do I dislike this feeling so much that I will change myself, me, into another person? How will you know? I took the pill. Have I just taken the first step in killing me, who I am? One day, I will be dead, buried underneath these chemicals. Will I have then committed suicide? I understand if you want to move this to another section but, I thought it worked better under the mind/body/soul style. __________________ "A skitter of light across a canvas of black"- Khollest

03-12-2007, 11:23 PM	#2
HellFrost666 Online Platinum Member Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: Planet Marclar Gender: Male Age: 31 Posts: 1,528	Head meds are unpredictable... Some people have great success with them, others do not. I also have problems with anxiety. Unlike you I have fought mine without medication despite the urging of some to medicate. I wouldn't say taking one pill is the "first step to killing" anything. If you don't like the results you see just stop taking them and explore other types of treatment. __________________ I wish that it might come to pass Not fade like all my dreams Just think of what my life might be In a world like I have seen I dont think I can carry on Carry on this cold and empty life Oh...no! My spirits are low in the depths of despair My lifeblood spills over... Don't worry... the middle 6 is still silent.

03-13-2007, 10:20 AM	#4
itsallgrand Offline Platinum Member Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: following my grace... Gender: None Specified Posts: 6,785	Khollest, Honestly, friend, it sounds like the anxiety is 'talking' big time. I understand why you would be scared and anxious about trying the meds. Meds scare me too. But you know what? Good for you for trying something! You went and spoke with somebody. You are working to address the problem. You obviously feel it so very difficult to speak with people that it is almost like a non-option as a treatment right now. So try to relax and to give the meds a shot. I strongly believe you are not killing a part of yourself! Like Hellfrost mentioned, it is hard to know how meds will work from person to person. If they don't seem to work for you, you can look to stopping the treatment. But what if they do help! And you then find yourself more able to talk, and work on other means of dealing with your anxiety. Wouldn't that be great, eh! Give them some time. I hope it works out for you.