Can you or your partner feel your IUD during sex?

[heaven]

I'm in a new relationship and desperately need to find a dependable, bearable method of birth control. My ex-husband had a vasectomy so I didn't have to worry about this for years. I've already got 3 wonderful children and don't plan on having any more, yet I do not like the permanence of having my tubes tied just in case I change my mind down the road.

I'm interested in the copper coil IUD, but out of the 3 women I know who use it only 1 has been completely happy with it. My cousin says that she can feel it and it's uncomfortable, so she doesn't like it. Another girl I know said her boyfriend could actually feel the IUD on the tip of his penis during sex (and he said it hurt). Turns out the doctor did not get it in properly or something.

Are any of you guys able to feel your partner's IUD during sex? How about you ladies? Can they be knocked out of place during sex? How big is the IUD?

I like that the IUD is hormone free. I used to use the pill and had absolutely no problems, but now I'm over 35 and I smoke (yeah, I know..... I've GOT to quit) so I'm not sure if this or any other type of hormonal BC is even an option for me.

What about the new Nuva Ring. Do any of you like it? Also, do any of you use a diaphram? I'm wondering if these can be felt during sex, and if they're comfortable and easy to use.

I would really appreciate your opinions and experiences with these or any other types of birth control. I want to hear it all, the good and the bad.

Thanks!

[Baby Carrot]

Hey Heaven,

I had an IUD for about 3 years.

Pros:
-Is cheap
-Is very very effective
-You get it installed and you can forget about it for years
-I didn´t end up pregnant


Cons:
-I had some major cramps because of it
-It hurted like hell when installed, and when removed
-I developed a minor infection in the utero/vagina
-The ex did feel it during intercourse. Nothing he couldn´t deal with, it was just like an itch cuz of that string that comes out of the cervix.

Can they be knocked out of place during sex?
No, that´s impossible. The IUD is inside your uterus and penises reach only the vaginal area. Two different compartments divided by the cervix.

How big is the IUD?
About half the length of a new pencil, but not as thick. Is as thick as one of those manicure wood sticks or a little less. It usually has the shape of a T, with that copper wire in the upper part (I had one of those)

[doyathink]

WHAT? They open your cervix to inset this?
That would hurt to bad.

[neophyte]

I had an IUD years ago. It was very painful having it put in. Then it was very painful every month during my period. After a couple of months my boyfriend said he could feel it. Said it felt like it was poking him. Shortly thereafter I found out I got pregnant right about that same time. He should not be able to feel it. If he can it's probably migrated out of the correct spot. I also found out I probably never should have been fitted with an IUD as I'm quite small and had never been pregnant or had children. I used it on the advice of Planned Parenthood cause I can't take the pill. Makes me too sick. Good luck.

[jengh]

yeah...ouch... i dont think I could do that one...

I'm also curious about the Nuva Ring... anyone here have it? Does it fall out? It seems to me like it could just slide out easily...or that the man could feel it?

[CharLit]

I had an IUD years ago. It was very painful having it put in. Then it was very painful every month during my period. After a couple of months my boyfriend said he could feel it. Said it felt like it was poking him. Shortly thereafter I found out I got pregnant right about that same time. He should not be able to feel it. If he can it's probably migrated out of the correct spot. I also found out I probably never should have been fitted with an IUD as I'm quite small and had never been pregnant or had children. I used it on the advice of Planned Parenthood cause I can't take the pill. Makes me too sick. Good luck.

Aww, Neophyte, that's REALLY unlucky, sorry to hear you had such a bad time with it

I have to say though, it is normal that your guy can feel it a little, they told me that when I had mine fitted: it doesn't mean that it's slipped out of place. IUDs are occasionally expelled by the body though, so it's a good idea to regularly check with your fingers whether the threads are still there.

Also, the opinions on whether or not to give it to women who haven't had children are divided: here in Holland it's quite common to give them to women who haven't been pregnant.

My own experience: having my copper IUD put in was painful, and for the first few months my periods were very heavy and painful, but they have gotten less so over time to the point where I only get very mild cramps. If you get the mirena coil, which releases a very low dosage of hormones, you will most likely have no periods at all, or only occasional spotting.

It's been five years, and I have not been pregnant, I love the thing as the pill made me sick, too, and I don't like condoms (NB: am in a long-term relationship and we both got tested for STDs before we stopped using condoms).

i know that's more info than the OP was asking, but I didn't want neophyte's bad experience to give the wrong impression about what is usually a very good method of contraception.

[cc2006]

Geeeez you women are brave. If I was told I could have a funky shaped doo-dad shoved into my nether-regions to prevent unwanted pregnancy I'd ponder the benefits of abstinance ... or at least some other methods. I'm cringing here.


Have you thought about those internal sponges? That way you avoid the whole "painful foreign objects" angle and still have a supposedly effective form of birth control.

My ex and I used them a few times with decent results. "Decent" because I could actually feel the sponge most times (though it wasn't painful .. just .. well .. poke a wet sponge with your finger ... it was odd to feel sexually) and we had "removal problems" a couple times, where the sponge had gotten pushed back to a point where it was difficult to retrieve it. I've got long fingers and it was still a chore a couple times.

They should make some kind of sanitary and non-pointy hook to get those if they wander off and get lost or turn around.


Just a suggestion.

[applepie]

I really wish birth control was the man's responsibilty ie. Male pill. They really need to develop that quick smart.

At this stage, every method of BC has it's down side. This makes me so mad. If it's not pain, it's the increased risk of cancer, heavy periods, or terrible mood swings.

They must really hate women.

[bitbit]

i was on the nuva ring, and both me and my boyfriend could feel it almost "snapping" during sex. it was kind of like a sharp pop if he went too deep. it also felt like it prevented him from getting to spots he used to hit. i only tried it for a month and did not like it. it doesn't fall out, however if you push (while going to the bathroom or during sex) it can pop out. i didn't feel any side effects of it but i think just knowing it was inside of me made me feel something when i'd sit a certain way... like a mental thing. i wouldn't go back on it. however... one of my friends is on it and absolutly loves it. i think it has to do with your size and your boyfriend's size.

[RayKay]

I have a copper IUD, have had it for about 8 or 9 months now and I LOVE it. I chose it after TOO many years on the pill and worries not only about health (high breast cancer risk in family), but also about my sex drive and anxiety etc that it seemed to be causing after so many years on it. I love fact I am not on hormones, don't have to think about it ever and just is not something I notice at all.

I would definitely be worried about your friend, sounds like her IUD is not in correctly, which means there is a risk of her getting pregnant/expelling it!

I, nor my boyfriend, have any qualms about it. I honestly do not notice it at all. The strings that come out of the cervix soften up after a few days, and coil up and around your cervix - you can't feel them (and neither can he apparently) and even when I check them once a month I have to search for them. If he DOES feel something, it should just be the strings, they should not be cut so short as to stab him or anything!

If you are worried about him feeling something...well the Ring or Diaphgram is more likely or just as likely to be felt.

Anyway, I love it. It was painful going in, and I was crampy for a couple hours after...but not bad enough to not go to the gym that night, and I was back to running the very next day too. My periods were heavier the first couple times, but I had also gone off the pill that time so it was expected. I have no cramping, and my periods are very bearable, which is saying a lot since I was used to the ones I had on the pill anyways which were so short so it was even greater change yet very bearable!

And I have never had kids or anything and they were fine putting it in, they do so more often now because the IUD's have changed. They got a bad rap in the 70's as the ones they had then were larger, caused cramping, heavy bleeding and infections due to the design and lack of information (ie you should NOT have an IUD if you have a high risk of infections or are not monogamous....there is a higher risk of infection travelling up strings into cervix). Now better education and better design (including smaller ones) means more women have access to them as an option.