Just a brief summary of my relationship. I've been with my girlfriend for over a year and we live together. We meet using Lavalife and I love her dearly and she has always told me she wouldn't dream of ever cheating on me because her heart won't let her.
About a month ago, I found out she started chatting with several guys she said her girlfriend introduced her to. She then started to chat with these guys over MSN and then over the phone. When I confronted her about this, she told me it was just friendly chat and she has not intention of ever meeting them or being with them. I began to get really suspicious and started looking at her MSN conversation history and noticed she was misleading these guys telling them she was single and how she would like to meet them. She would even get phone calls from these guys and she would lie telling me it was her girlfriend. I begged her to please stop and she told me she would because she didn't want to hurt me anymore so she deleted these guys off her MSN and promised not to talk to them anymore.
About a couple of weeks ago, she told me she was going out to her girlfriend's house. But when her girlfriend called, it sounded like a guy. When I asked her about this, she insisted it was her girlfriend and asked me to trust her. Convinced that it was a guy I heard and I remembered that one of th guys in her MSN wanted to meet her at a bar. I didn't even have to follow her, I left 5 minutes after she did and my heart dropped when I saw her car parked outside the bar. I went into the bar and saw her with this guy she was talking to on MSN. I just introduced myself and told them to have a good time and fell apart outside. She didn't even run after me or call me to explain. I called her mom and her mom called her and told her that I was falling apart outside. She finally came out and told me she was meeting the guy with her girlfriend and that I didn't see her girlfriend because she was in the bathroom. She then wanted to go back in and finish the drink with her friends.
I believed this and went back home. I gave her girlfriend a call and she said she didn't leave her house and doesn't even know who this guy was that my girlfriend was seeing. Knowing that she lied to me, I confronted her and soon all the lies started coming out. My girlfriend even told this guy I was her ex when I caught them and I forced her to call this guy and apologize for misleading him. There were several times I just wanted to give up on her because of all her lies and doing things behind my back.
I even found out recently that she meet this guy and all the others off Lavalife, which she started using again a month ago. She insists she was not cheating on me and it would not go any further than a drink but if she just wanted to be friends, why does she need to deceive and lie about it? My trust in her has been shattered but I do know I still love her and gave her a second chance. It just seems everyday, I find something else. Just recently, I found out she emailed this guy she meet saying that she's not fully in love with me and that she was starting to like him. Her explanation was she just wanted to be nice and apologize but she continues to lie to others and myself. What I'm doing is wrong too, checking on her, her email. I don't want to, I really don't but it seems like the only way to stop her from doing what she is doing. I have pleaded with her over the past month to stop all this nonsense and she promised she would but I just never believed she would go and meet this guy. Would you consider this cheating? Or was she just looking for attention or a friend?
Sorry for the long story ... I don't have anyone I can talk to about this. If I tell my friends or family, they'll just tell me to leave her and I want to believe she is a good person for me.