Cancer --- Fears ---

southerngirl · 10-07-2006, 06:38 PM

My mother found out she had breast cancer when she was 32 or so... I think... between 31-33..

Anyways I was a young girl. I remember watching her in the hospital and being told mommy was sick.

She fought it, she kept fighting it. It kept coming back in new places in her body. Finally after a close to 20 year fight she lost the battle. She was 51 years old and on Aug 25th 2004 she died.

I grew up watching her fight cancer.

I am deathly afraid that this will be my fate.

I have never had a mammogram. I turn 29 in november and am pregnant with my 3rd child. By all rights I should have been getting checked out years ago.

I live in fear though. If I see a doctor and am found to have cancer then I would have to face it.

I also have a spot on my face that is discolored. Its a reddish spot that I noticed 2 years ago. It shows up in every picture I take, but it can be covered with makeup. I have never had it looked at. Im afraid that its cancerous but without checking one can never tell.

I felt I would confess that to all of you.

MewSkitty · 10-07-2006, 06:48 PM

No one in my family since my birth had faced cancer, but my gandpa died of lung cancer 13 years before my birth. I am deathly afraid of any form of cancer. I see it as a death centains to me. Every mole on my body I worry it it could give me cancer. Every freckle I worry if it's skin cancer, I live in a fear that no one can cure.

**annie24** · 10-07-2006, 06:49 PM

I think you should head to the doctor and get it checked out. chances are that it is nothing, just a birthmark or sunspot, but may as well be certain.

and if it makes you feel better, having children at an early age decreases your risk of breast cancer.

Beyondthesea · 10-07-2006, 08:34 PM

You know sweetie, the best way to prevent cancer is screening. If you go and get checked out often, even if you do eventually have cancer

1. They will have detailed records of your health
2. They will have test results to compare to
3. You have a MUCH higher chance of being cured because they will catch it early.

Go for your peace of mind if nothing else. There's nothing wrong with making sure you are healthy to calm your fears.

Much love, hugs and blessings...

vandgsmom · 10-07-2006, 08:40 PM

I have soooo many odd spots on mr that have been checked and were nothing, but I still have to go and get them checked every time I find another one... It is what you do for your own peace of mind.

I am adopted, and after Tori was born I began to worry over my own failing health because I wanted to make sure that I was going to stick around for the kiddos.... I got genetic testing, I got a mammogram, and I got proactive.

You can do this, you will be fine. Make the appointment, even if you are pregnant, do it before this baby is born to take it off your mind.....

**avman** · 10-07-2006, 09:04 PM

I know you are afraid, but ignoring the problem will not make it go away nor will it make it less likely you will end up having cancer. Early detection and early treatment is the key. You've already taken the first step and that is confessing your fear.

We're here to help you face it.

If she doesn't see this, I recommend you PM RayKay. She's been through a very similar situation and I know she can share some words of wisdom.

n83 · 10-07-2006, 09:09 PM

That is a completely legitimate fear.. but honey you have to get checked out because NOT doing so could make it worse if you do have it. Obviously you know that but you don't want to wish you had done something about it sooner. PLEASE get a mammogram and have that skin discoloration checked out, just to be on the safe side. Your kids need their mommy to be healthy for them!!

southerngirl · 10-07-2006, 09:41 PM

Thank you for the responses. I know you are all right. I just wish I could bring myself to take that step.

Tigris · 10-07-2006, 11:19 PM

Go and see your doctor and explain about your Mother and that you've never had a mammogram. Also ask him to look at the spot.

It's better to be safe than sorry.

Good luck and take care.

vandgsmom · 10-08-2006, 12:08 AM

You CAN bring yourself to take that step.

We have all read your posts and I know I am not the only one here who has seen in you a strong woman and a good mother.

You CAN do this, and deep down you know that you will. It is a scary thing, it is the moment before you pull the sticker out where you dread the pain even though your rational mind knows it will only be fleeting...

You know you will feel better once you take the step, you know that the step is inevitable, what you need to do is make yourself do it because NOW is the time to take care of this....

We all love you and will be here to support you through process. I know you will make the right decision, you just have to convince yourself of that too...

10-07-2006, 06:38 PM	#1
southerngirl Offline Platinum Member Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: NW Georgia Gender: Female Posts: 3,032	Cancer --- Fears --- My mother found out she had breast cancer when she was 32 or so... I think... between 31-33.. Anyways I was a young girl. I remember watching her in the hospital and being told mommy was sick. She fought it, she kept fighting it. It kept coming back in new places in her body. Finally after a close to 20 year fight she lost the battle. She was 51 years old and on Aug 25th 2004 she died. I grew up watching her fight cancer. I am deathly afraid that this will be my fate. I have never had a mammogram. I turn 29 in november and am pregnant with my 3rd child. By all rights I should have been getting checked out years ago. I live in fear though. If I see a doctor and am found to have cancer then I would have to face it. I also have a spot on my face that is discolored. Its a reddish spot that I noticed 2 years ago. It shows up in every picture I take, but it can be covered with makeup. I have never had it looked at. Im afraid that its cancerous but without checking one can never tell. I felt I would confess that to all of you. __________________ A wise man learns by the mistakes of others, a fool by his own. Latin Proverb

10-07-2006, 08:34 PM	#4
Beyondthesea Offline Gold Member Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: where the streets have no name Gender: Female Age: 28 Posts: 1,606	You know sweetie, the best way to prevent cancer is screening. If you go and get checked out often, even if you do eventually have cancer 1. They will have detailed records of your health 2. They will have test results to compare to 3. You have a MUCH higher chance of being cured because they will catch it early. Go for your peace of mind if nothing else. There's nothing wrong with making sure you are healthy to calm your fears. Much love, hugs and blessings... __________________ _____________________________ Dreams are renewable, whether you're five or 105, you have a lifetime ahead of you. ~Rev. Dale Turner It's never too late, in fiction or in life, to revise. ~Nancy Thayer Every day you sit back and wait for something to happen is another day lost. ~Jennifer Flavin

10-07-2006, 09:04 PM	#6
avman Offline Administrator Join Date: Aug 2003 Location: Minnesota Gender: Male Age: 42 Posts: 6,524	I know you are afraid, but ignoring the problem will not make it go away nor will it make it less likely you will end up having cancer. Early detection and early treatment is the key. You've already taken the first step and that is confessing your fear. We're here to help you face it. If she doesn't see this, I recommend you PM RayKay. She's been through a very similar situation and I know she can share some words of wisdom. __________________ "Children are a wonderful gift . . . They have an extraordinary capacity to see into the heart of things and to expose sham and humbug for what they are." Desmond Tutu

10-07-2006, 09:41 PM	#8
southerngirl Offline Platinum Member Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: NW Georgia Gender: Female Posts: 3,032	Thank you for the responses. I know you are all right. I just wish I could bring myself to take that step. __________________ A wise man learns by the mistakes of others, a fool by his own. Latin Proverb

10-07-2006, 06:48 PM	#2
MewSkitty Offline Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: In a world of kindness Gender: Male Age: 20 Posts: 304	No one in my family since my birth had faced cancer, but my gandpa died of lung cancer 13 years before my birth. I am deathly afraid of any form of cancer. I see it as a death centains to me. Every mole on my body I worry it it could give me cancer. Every freckle I worry if it's skin cancer, I live in a fear that no one can cure.

10-07-2006, 06:49 PM	#3
annie24 Offline Super Moderator Join Date: Oct 2004 Age: 29 Posts: 26,814	I think you should head to the doctor and get it checked out. chances are that it is nothing, just a birthmark or sunspot, but may as well be certain. and if it makes you feel better, having children at an early age decreases your risk of breast cancer.

10-07-2006, 08:40 PM	#5
vandgsmom Offline Gold Member Join Date: Dec 2005 Gender: Female Posts: 677	I have soooo many odd spots on mr that have been checked and were nothing, but I still have to go and get them checked every time I find another one... It is what you do for your own peace of mind. I am adopted, and after Tori was born I began to worry over my own failing health because I wanted to make sure that I was going to stick around for the kiddos.... I got genetic testing, I got a mammogram, and I got proactive. You can do this, you will be fine. Make the appointment, even if you are pregnant, do it before this baby is born to take it off your mind.....

10-07-2006, 09:09 PM	#7
n83 Offline Silver Member Join Date: Mar 2006 Posts: 814	That is a completely legitimate fear.. but honey you have to get checked out because NOT doing so could make it worse if you do have it. Obviously you know that but you don't want to wish you had done something about it sooner. PLEASE get a mammogram and have that skin discoloration checked out, just to be on the safe side. Your kids need their mommy to be healthy for them!!

10-07-2006, 11:19 PM	#9
Tigris Offline Silver Member Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: England Gender: Female Age: 46 Posts: 3,556	Go and see your doctor and explain about your Mother and that you've never had a mammogram. Also ask him to look at the spot. It's better to be safe than sorry. Good luck and take care.

10-08-2006, 12:08 AM	#10
vandgsmom Offline Gold Member Join Date: Dec 2005 Gender: Female Posts: 677	You CAN bring yourself to take that step. We have all read your posts and I know I am not the only one here who has seen in you a strong woman and a good mother. You CAN do this, and deep down you know that you will. It is a scary thing, it is the moment before you pull the sticker out where you dread the pain even though your rational mind knows it will only be fleeting... You know you will feel better once you take the step, you know that the step is inevitable, what you need to do is make yourself do it because NOW is the time to take care of this.... We all love you and will be here to support you through process. I know you will make the right decision, you just have to convince yourself of that too...