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Getting old – how to deal with it?


an0ldbag

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I'll be 43 in a few months. I'm getting old and I'm having really hard time accepting it.

 

More and more wrinkles every day. I'm starting to sag. I'm getting fat much easier that ever. I became an old bag.

And there is nothing I can do about it.

 

I always thought, when you pass certain age, you simply accept you are 'old' and don't care how you look any more. But it doesn't work that way.

Especially when I catch my husband looking at young perky things. That makes me feel so helpless.

 

The whole situation makes me so feel so depressed.

 

Has anyone else had similar problems?

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aww. Dont be upset. I will confess, I will be 26 in 20 days, and I am dreading that. Every birthday, I am a little upset that I am growing older. I know it sounds ridiculous! But I remind myself that age is just a number, and you are only as old as you feel.

 

Try getting on a healthy routine. Like going for a brisk walk or a jog. Also try the Yoga thing. It helps in calming down the stress and releases the "feel good" harmones. It will make you a confident person, and thats a big turn on for husbands who "look around".

 

Wish you good luck, and welcome on board.

Maasikus

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I considered suicide when I turned 35

 

wow...thats scary....Anyway, I think its pretty harsh what this growing old thing does for people. Everybody is growing old, and there is nothing much we can do about it. Whats prudent is to fight that process and live a happy healthy life.

 

Has anyone considered what a nice long vacation does to your health and happiness? I don't know why we work our @$$e$ off in this short life. When I am 30, I want to quit my job and go on a world tour - not the quick 30 day trip, but take a year or two and explore places.

(Starts calculating the expenses and worries some more..haha)

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Thanks guys,

 

I missed the deleted post but I'm sorry if I caused problems.

 

Maasikus, one of my problems is that due to old injuries, I can only do very light exercises. But I'm trying.

 

Dako, I'm coping too. Somehow. But is that all we can hope for?

Maybe at some point I will admit that I'm old but I still look at it as 'giving up'. I don't want to give up yet, but it seems I'm loosing this battle...

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AnOldbag,

 

I have had lots of older friends to learn from. I was once the kid in a large group of seniors who lived such big lives it inspired me. Some had severe ailments but pushed themselves to attend our regular gatherings. We had an Alzheimer's patient, an amputee, an extremely deaf fellow, a woman who was constantly healing from repeated falls, a woman with advanced osteporosis and a lady with brain damage from lead poisoning. Often they would have strokes, heart attacks or break a hip, yet still make it to the next meeting if they weren't out visiting Turkey, crewing on a sailing ship through Elderhostels or taking care of sick friends.

These people became family and eventually in a two year period, about 12 of them died. They all had problems, but were alive to the end.

That sounds trite, but they all had something in common, a curiosity about others.

 

I'm trying to live that way. I want to try new things and widen my scope.

Today I got a silly tattoo and chatted with the artists about their world. It was interesting on many levels, and it was a new experience. I plan to do more little things to explore life. I was forced to by a divorce, but it opened up my eyes beyond TV, films, or other mind numbing ruts.

 

It's the view of the world that matters, not the view in the mirror.

I doubt you're an old bag.

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Thank you, Dako, that was really inspiring.

 

I suppose part of my problems are my health issues an inability to do things I would like to do, which makes the image in the mirror look much worse.

 

But you are so right, I should stop worrying if I'm good enough for this world – instead, I should ask myself what in this world is good enough for me to enjoy.

 

Thanks

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I turned 30 this year. From 27-28, I dated a guy who was in his mid-30s, but always talked about girls 18, 19, 20 years old. I treated him like he was ridiculous... "Dude! They're HALF your age!" But deep down, it did get to me. And now I'm with a guy who's a few years younger than me. I'm thinking "What does he want with an old bag like me?" But he thinks I'm beautiful. It's like I'm a teenager with low self-esteem ALL over again! Except I'm not a teenager... I've got lines in my forehead, & any skin exposed to the sun over the years is starting to really look its age. People have always told me that I look ten years younger than I am, but recently I've started telling them to look closer, lol. I'm trying to not care. It's part of me going on this journey toward loving myself unconditionally.

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