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Thread: Stubborn boyfriend!!!!!

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    Yvette84's Avatar
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    Stubborn boyfriend!!!!!

    So I am madly in love with this guy, and we've only been together a little while, but I noticed he's REALLY stubborn!!!! he always has to be right. And most of thew time it's about dumb little things but it always has to be where he gets the last word or I have to prove myself to him! (when I KNOW i'm right)
    I've spoken to him about this and he is still the same! I would never want to end it because if this, because nobody's perfect, and it's the only big problem I see. Any tips on how to deal with this????? thanx!

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    Platinum Member Hope75's Avatar
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    Perhaps sometimes it is better to agree to disagree. If you know you are right, is it really worth arguing over?

    One of the secrets to a lasting relationship is knowing how to pick and choose your battles, and knowing when to back off because it's just not worth having a fight over. Since you say it's mostly stupid little things, is it really worth it?

    A simple, "I agree to disagree" and let it go might be your best course of action when you find yourself getting baited into an arguement over something that is just not that important.
    Mama to a beautiful baby girl born 6-25-09. :) AND a beautiful baby boy born 6-14-11. :)

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    "An angel in the book of life wrote down my baby's birth.
    Then whispered as she closed the book "too beautiful for earth".
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    Member life_laugh_love's Avatar
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    Dude, I feel like that sometimes. I've been with my boyfriend for over three years! Ya, sometimes just agreeing will work out, but you can't do it all the time. Did you ever tell him that he is stubborn? A little secret that I do, and I know its bad, but I make my boyfriend feel guilty sometimes. Then they give in 95% of the time. Its bad, but sometimes you have to trick them. hehe

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    Yvette84's Avatar
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    How do you trick him? what's the little secret you do?? I have told him he's stubborn, and he has even told me he IS. but then of course we'll argue about that, because he says "I'm not THAT stubborn" and again, he has to be right about that!!! lol

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    Here is a secret I have found. It takes two to argue. Simple refuse to argue with him. Men want to have authority and win. So as hard as it may be, when he tries to get you going just smile and change the subject or agree with him. Works every time.

    I have to say that spending your life with someone who always would rather be right than happy; and right at your expense, it gets really old really fast.

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    Member life_laugh_love's Avatar
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    its stupid, I know, but I cry really easily, I am very emotional, but cry, bring up something that you know would bother him and he would give it. An example is "you ditched me for your friends and I had all these plans for us." Make him feel guilty for something he has done to you even if it bothered you or really didn't affect you at all. This is not a thing you do all the time lol, but sometimes its good to hear that they admit they are wrong.

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    Platinum Member Hope75's Avatar
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    I'm not a big advocate of 'tricking' someone or playing games. Aren't we adults here?

    Obviously you can work this out any way you want, just try to remember that a healthy, respectful relationship doesn't include manipulation and games.

    I know I wouldn't want to be tricked, and in kind I wouldn't trick my bf either.
    Mama to a beautiful baby girl born 6-25-09. :) AND a beautiful baby boy born 6-14-11. :)

    Baby # 2 forever missed lost 6-3-10.

    "An angel in the book of life wrote down my baby's birth.
    Then whispered as she closed the book "too beautiful for earth".
    ~author unknown

    "Victory is sweetest when you have known defeat"
    ~ Malcolm Forbes

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    Yvette84's Avatar
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    I don't wanna trick him or play games. I just want him to grow up and stop being so stubborn. Sometimes it IS about things that matter, like things in our faith. I dunno....

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    I hear you about having a stubburn boyfriend.
    I think men particularly feel they have to know things, have to be right about everything. It's what makes a man a man apperently. Especially if he is young, he may feel like he has to assert his rightness over you to feel like a man. It seems to be really hard for some men to acknowledge they are with an equal , with differing but valid opinions and ideas.
    I think/hope it gets better with age. That young cockiness wears thin around 30-35.
    Women in general are raised to be accomadating and to back down in a disagreement. But we're not doing that quite as much as we used to. So men are having to adjust.
    Maybe just be understanding that he has a need to feel right about things. Who knows, with time and patients he may see that you are often right or at least be able to discuss things in a more mature fashion. But it could be a while.

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    Yvette84's Avatar
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    yeah, it seems like a young guy thing, that's why I never date guys my age, the older ones wetre never like this. So I know it's because he's young, I Love him alot though, so I'll try to just be paitent.

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