back off, it's my life?

The_Vacancy · 07-27-2006, 10:52 AM

how do i say that.

i'm limited to everything. the clothes i wear, the activities i do, the things i say. "you're not allowed to dye your hair, you'll look like a goth. you'll get picked on." "don't gel your hair like that, you can't even see out of your eyes at the moment." and so on. i want to just kind of do what i want. our bond between me and my family is weak. i shout at them, they treat me like garbage, they overrule what i do, i have to be rebellious to get what i want to get sometimes. i don't like it but it's not their life, I know my own consequences.

how do i tell them to back off, to let me do what i want?

that i can dye black hair, listen to music rather then talking, wear a studded belt cos i like it not cos they think i'll look stupid and will get picked on for it.

i'm the middle kid. naturally, i get treated like garbage in comparison with my other brothers.

Hemorrhage · 07-27-2006, 11:05 AM

How old are you? Your age probobly has effect on this.

**BellaDonna** · 07-27-2006, 11:10 AM

Seeing that your 14, based on your other post- http://www.enotalone.com/forum/showthread.php?t=143814 it does seem a little early to tell your parents to back off. Unfortunately, the way it works is that if you're still living with them- you're going to hear their opinions. They are involved in your life because they created your life.

If they are being mentally abusive- then that's a whole other story. But from what you wrote here- their behavior sounds pretty common and the battle you're having is pretty common.

At age 15 I begged my parents to let me get my bellybutton pierced and we fought about it a lot. They refused to let me. To be honest- I'm thankful for that now- because by the time I turned 18 I was over it and didn't even want it anymore.

Is this battle really worth fighting right now? How important is hair color? Think about it. Can it wait?

I'm not trying to discredit your feelings- but you have to weigh the consequences- is hair color really worth all of this misery? Sometimes you need to know when to surrender....to save yourself a major headache.

BellaDonna

confused25 · 07-28-2006, 12:32 PM

When I was your age my parents wouldn't let me dye my hair or let me get my ears pierced or get tattoos, but I did all of those things anyway. I don't think you're getting treated like garbage, that's just the way parents are. You'll understand it when you're a parent yourself. They are just looking out for you. Honestly now I look back at all of those things I have done when I was younger, I'm like, what the heck was I thinking anyway?

yeawutever · 07-29-2006, 03:15 PM

Wait till you either 18 or older, but do remember that while you're living under their roof, you must go by their rules, yea IT SUCKS!!!!!!!

07-27-2006, 10:52 AM	#1
The_Vacancy Offline Member Join Date: Nov 2005 Gender: Male Posts: 65	back off, it's my life? how do i say that. i'm limited to everything. the clothes i wear, the activities i do, the things i say. "you're not allowed to dye your hair, you'll look like a goth. you'll get picked on." "don't gel your hair like that, you can't even see out of your eyes at the moment." and so on. i want to just kind of do what i want. our bond between me and my family is weak. i shout at them, they treat me like garbage, they overrule what i do, i have to be rebellious to get what i want to get sometimes. i don't like it but it's not their life, I know my own consequences. how do i tell them to back off, to let me do what i want? that i can dye black hair, listen to music rather then talking, wear a studded belt cos i like it not cos they think i'll look stupid and will get picked on for it. i'm the middle kid. naturally, i get treated like garbage in comparison with my other brothers.

07-27-2006, 11:10 AM	#3
BellaDonna Offline Super Moderator Join Date: Dec 2004 Location: U.S. Gender: Female Age: 29 Posts: 6,583	Seeing that your 14, based on your other post- http://www.enotalone.com/forum/showthread.php?t=143814 it does seem a little early to tell your parents to back off. Unfortunately, the way it works is that if you're still living with them- you're going to hear their opinions. They are involved in your life because they created your life. If they are being mentally abusive- then that's a whole other story. But from what you wrote here- their behavior sounds pretty common and the battle you're having is pretty common. At age 15 I begged my parents to let me get my bellybutton pierced and we fought about it a lot. They refused to let me. To be honest- I'm thankful for that now- because by the time I turned 18 I was over it and didn't even want it anymore. Is this battle really worth fighting right now? How important is hair color? Think about it. Can it wait? I'm not trying to discredit your feelings- but you have to weigh the consequences- is hair color really worth all of this misery? Sometimes you need to know when to surrender....to save yourself a major headache. BellaDonna __________________ "Well behaved women rarely make history." "Friendship should be a refuge, not an ordeal." Please see the forum rules for posting on enotalone:http://www.enotalone.com/forum/forum-rules.php Last edited by BellaDonna; 07-27-2006 at 11:13 AM.

07-29-2006, 03:15 PM	#5
yeawutever Online Platinum Member Join Date: Oct 2005 Gender: None Specified Age: 22 Posts: 5,673	Wait till you either 18 or older, but do remember that while you're living under their roof, you must go by their rules, yea IT SUCKS!!!!!!! __________________ Opened-minded to those in need of help. Not everything is black and white as it seems.... If you're gonna do something, think twice and make sure it's something worthy that you don't later on regret!!!!!!!!!!! Still in a LDR with boyfriend.

07-27-2006, 11:05 AM	#2
Hemorrhage Offline Member Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: United States Gender: Male Age: 18 Posts: 82	How old are you? Your age probobly has effect on this.

07-28-2006, 12:32 PM	#4
confused25 Offline Silver Member Join Date: May 2006 Posts: 586	When I was your age my parents wouldn't let me dye my hair or let me get my ears pierced or get tattoos, but I did all of those things anyway. I don't think you're getting treated like garbage, that's just the way parents are. You'll understand it when you're a parent yourself. They are just looking out for you. Honestly now I look back at all of those things I have done when I was younger, I'm like, what the heck was I thinking anyway?