IS smoking weed such a bad thing???

iTaLiaNa515 · 05-26-2006, 12:49 PM

Hey ya'll. I have a quick question for everyone. My boyfriend and I have been arguing over this topic for a while and frankly im gettings tired of it. I've asked a couple of my cousins and friends but i wanna ask ya'll and see what u guys say. my boyfriend has a habit with smoking weed! he doesnt do it around me because im pregnant but only when he goes out with his friends, and if he is high he comes home and acts himself, but i still get mad and we start arguing. Should i just get over it? as long as he doesnt bring it around me and his personality doesnt change?

chai714 · 05-26-2006, 12:58 PM

In my opinion, you shouldn't use drugs which are deemed illegal - one, because of the moral aspect and two, they impair judgement. Yes, alcohol also impairs judgement but it is not legal to consume it and then operate a vehicle.

If you're smoking weed for recreational use, then yes it is such a bad thing. I often associate "bud smokers" with "losers."

Relationship Coach · 05-26-2006, 01:08 PM

If you are carrying his baby you have every right in the world to ride him like a dime store pony! It's time for him to grow up and leave the weed behind with his adolescence. Being a new father is hard enough, being a stoned new father is a waste of sperm.

RC

kellbell · 05-26-2006, 01:12 PM

It is a bad thing IMO. Use of all illegal drugs or abusing legal drugs is against all my boundries and morals. I have seen them destroy families, marriages, careers, and lives.

I dated a person whom smoked weed around me and when I was not around. I felt disrespected when he did it around me because he knew I did not approve.

The bottom line all kinds of things can be bad in a relationship, such as porn addiction, gambling, internet addictions, shopping addictions, and what have you because they can hinder on the dynamics of the relationship, interfere with many aspects of the relationship. Thus causing tension, arugments, perhaps lying to cover it up and communication to shut down. All of those are poisionous to a relationship, so it does not necessarily have to be a drug per sae.

I would have a talk with your boyfriend about it in a non-attacking manner. Tell him you are worried about him and what can happen. Also, if I was in your situation, I would never trust anyone with my baby whom smokes weed or does any kind of drugs. Something can happen. Tell him you fear for the safety of your baby. Start from there and see what happens. Good luck with everything.

Scout · 05-26-2006, 01:23 PM

I disagree. I think weed is way less harmful than alcohol, but because it's illegal, it has a stigma. Guess I'll never understand why alcohol is legal, but weed is not. Booze makes people do stupid and violent things; weed can make you a little silly, but nowhere near to the point being drunk does.

It sounds to me like your boyfriend smokes less pot than the average social drinker drinks. If he really had a problem with it (and studies have never conclusively proven it's addictive) he would be high a lot more than what you describe. I also think he would be more than able to hold to an agreement to never be high around the baby - something an alcholic would never be able to stick to.

Scout · 05-26-2006, 01:32 PM

I feel like I should probably add to my post a bit...there are some people who sit around getting stoned all day, and do little else. That's definitely a problem, but it seems your boyfriend does not use pot that way at all.

Bethany · 05-26-2006, 01:43 PM

If he is using IT - Not a problem.
If IT is using him - Big problem.

shes2smart · 05-26-2006, 01:50 PM

I agree with Scout in there is such a thing as responsible marijuana usage.

Unfortunately, the fact that it's illegal complicates the issue.

If he drank alcohol the way he smoked weed, would you have a problem with his alcohol usage? Or would he be considered a social/casual drinker? I think you're probably within your rights to say you won't put up with usage around you or the baby, though.

Beyond that, it's something of a gray area to me. I tend to have more negative views on people who go out to a bar, drink, and then try to operate a vehicle than people who sit at home, smoke a joint, and do whatever they do to amuse themselves at home.

The bar patron is putting unconsenting others at risk with his/her actions when s/he chooses to drive after drinking. The people staying home with their illegal joint are putting their own health at risk (which is a choice they can make for themselves) and perhaps putting the contents of their refrigerator in peril.

So, I don't know that there's going to be any clear answer except for what your own preferences/conscience/moral code tells you.

Scout · 05-26-2006, 02:00 PM

It's really even debatable how much health risk there is to pot-smoking. It was all over the news recently about a pretty significant study that revealed there is no link to cancer and smoking pot.

[Only registered and activated users can see links. ]

shorty20 · 05-26-2006, 02:04 PM

well... I can deffinatley relate to you. Me and my highschool boyfriend of 3 years broke up because of his weed-smoking habits. First off, I'm sorry but from the knowledge I gained from my bf I don't know if you'll be able to get your bf to stop smoking weed. You can't make them do something the don't want to do and you can't change them... they have to WANT to change. If it bothers you, then I would set guidelines... I dont' think weed is any worse than alcohol, probably even not as bad... but if it bothers you confront him. Tell him why you don't want him to do it. I would deffinatley say no smoking or being high around the baby, that's just irresponsible.

05-26-2006, 12:49 PM	#1
iTaLiaNa515 Offline Member Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Atlantic city, Nj Gender: Female Age: 22 Posts: 6	IS smoking weed such a bad thing??? Hey ya'll. I have a quick question for everyone. My boyfriend and I have been arguing over this topic for a while and frankly im gettings tired of it. I've asked a couple of my cousins and friends but i wanna ask ya'll and see what u guys say. my boyfriend has a habit with smoking weed! he doesnt do it around me because im pregnant but only when he goes out with his friends, and if he is high he comes home and acts himself, but i still get mad and we start arguing. Should i just get over it? as long as he doesnt bring it around me and his personality doesnt change? __________________ <;JenniFer;>

05-26-2006, 12:58 PM	#2
chai714 Offline Platinum Member Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: The End of the Pier Gender: Male Age: 31 Posts: 2,705	In my opinion, you shouldn't use drugs which are deemed illegal - one, because of the moral aspect and two, they impair judgement. Yes, alcohol also impairs judgement but it is not legal to consume it and then operate a vehicle. If you're smoking weed for recreational use, then yes it is such a bad thing. I often associate "bud smokers" with "losers." __________________ "Your mind is your greatest weapon." - David J. Lieberman, Ph.D "Most every person or situation can be influenced through the power of psychology."

05-26-2006, 01:08 PM	#3
Relationship Coach Offline Gold Member Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: Las Vegas, NV Gender: Male Age: 46 Posts: 1,952	If you are carrying his baby you have every right in the world to ride him like a dime store pony! It's time for him to grow up and leave the weed behind with his adolescence. Being a new father is hard enough, being a stoned new father is a waste of sperm. RC __________________ The slightest impact can make the greatest change.

05-26-2006, 01:12 PM	#4
kellbell Offline Platinum Member Join Date: Aug 2005 Location: Colorado Gender: Female Age: 33 Posts: 4,333	It is a bad thing IMO. Use of all illegal drugs or abusing legal drugs is against all my boundries and morals. I have seen them destroy families, marriages, careers, and lives. I dated a person whom smoked weed around me and when I was not around. I felt disrespected when he did it around me because he knew I did not approve. The bottom line all kinds of things can be bad in a relationship, such as porn addiction, gambling, internet addictions, shopping addictions, and what have you because they can hinder on the dynamics of the relationship, interfere with many aspects of the relationship. Thus causing tension, arugments, perhaps lying to cover it up and communication to shut down. All of those are poisionous to a relationship, so it does not necessarily have to be a drug per sae. I would have a talk with your boyfriend about it in a non-attacking manner. Tell him you are worried about him and what can happen. Also, if I was in your situation, I would never trust anyone with my baby whom smokes weed or does any kind of drugs. Something can happen. Tell him you fear for the safety of your baby. Start from there and see what happens. Good luck with everything. __________________ "Let your soul be your pilot, let your soul guide you, it will guide you well." Sting <---- me and my mom :) "Get busy living or get busy dyin', damn right..." Morgan Freeman, Shawshank Redemption. Last edited by kellbell; 05-26-2006 at 01:14 PM.

05-26-2006, 01:23 PM	#5
Scout Offline Platinum Member Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: Colorado Gender: Female Age: 40 Posts: 7,291	I disagree. I think weed is way less harmful than alcohol, but because it's illegal, it has a stigma. Guess I'll never understand why alcohol is legal, but weed is not. Booze makes people do stupid and violent things; weed can make you a little silly, but nowhere near to the point being drunk does. It sounds to me like your boyfriend smokes less pot than the average social drinker drinks. If he really had a problem with it (and studies have never conclusively proven it's addictive) he would be high a lot more than what you describe. I also think he would be more than able to hold to an agreement to never be high around the baby - something an alcholic would never be able to stick to. __________________ If your dog is fat, you're not getting enough exercise. * * * One of the most tragic things I know about human nature is that all of us tend to put off living. We are all dreaming of some magical rose garden over the horizon instead of enjoying the roses that are blooming outside our windows today. - Dale Carnegie * * * Bob Ross rules! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zOpF_ZGD4Ps

05-26-2006, 01:32 PM	#6
Scout Offline Platinum Member Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: Colorado Gender: Female Age: 40 Posts: 7,291	I feel like I should probably add to my post a bit...there are some people who sit around getting stoned all day, and do little else. That's definitely a problem, but it seems your boyfriend does not use pot that way at all. __________________ If your dog is fat, you're not getting enough exercise. * * * One of the most tragic things I know about human nature is that all of us tend to put off living. We are all dreaming of some magical rose garden over the horizon instead of enjoying the roses that are blooming outside our windows today. - Dale Carnegie * * * Bob Ross rules! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zOpF_ZGD4Ps

05-26-2006, 01:43 PM	#7
Bethany Offline Gold Member Join Date: Sep 2005 Gender: Female Posts: 2,030	If he is using IT - Not a problem. If IT is using him - Big problem.

05-26-2006, 01:50 PM	#8
shes2smart Offline Platinum Member Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: same world, different server Gender: Female Age: 45 Posts: 5,139	I agree with Scout in there is such a thing as responsible marijuana usage. Unfortunately, the fact that it's illegal complicates the issue. If he drank alcohol the way he smoked weed, would you have a problem with his alcohol usage? Or would he be considered a social/casual drinker? I think you're probably within your rights to say you won't put up with usage around you or the baby, though. Beyond that, it's something of a gray area to me. I tend to have more negative views on people who go out to a bar, drink, and then try to operate a vehicle than people who sit at home, smoke a joint, and do whatever they do to amuse themselves at home. The bar patron is putting unconsenting others at risk with his/her actions when s/he chooses to drive after drinking. The people staying home with their illegal joint are putting their own health at risk (which is a choice they can make for themselves) and perhaps putting the contents of their refrigerator in peril. So, I don't know that there's going to be any clear answer except for what your own preferences/conscience/moral code tells you. __________________ "But there's no use crying over every mistake You just keep on trying til you run out of cake"

05-26-2006, 02:00 PM	#9
Scout Offline Platinum Member Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: Colorado Gender: Female Age: 40 Posts: 7,291	It's really even debatable how much health risk there is to pot-smoking. It was all over the news recently about a pretty significant study that revealed there is no link to cancer and smoking pot. [Only registered and activated users can see links. ] __________________ If your dog is fat, you're not getting enough exercise. * * * One of the most tragic things I know about human nature is that all of us tend to put off living. We are all dreaming of some magical rose garden over the horizon instead of enjoying the roses that are blooming outside our windows today. - Dale Carnegie * * * Bob Ross rules! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zOpF_ZGD4Ps

05-26-2006, 02:04 PM	#10
shorty20 Offline Bronze Member Join Date: May 2005 Location: Nebraska Gender: Female Age: 24 Posts: 1,087	well... I can deffinatley relate to you. Me and my highschool boyfriend of 3 years broke up because of his weed-smoking habits. First off, I'm sorry but from the knowledge I gained from my bf I don't know if you'll be able to get your bf to stop smoking weed. You can't make them do something the don't want to do and you can't change them... they have to WANT to change. If it bothers you, then I would set guidelines... I dont' think weed is any worse than alcohol, probably even not as bad... but if it bothers you confront him. Tell him why you don't want him to do it. I would deffinatley say no smoking or being high around the baby, that's just irresponsible. __________________ ~It's not about waiting for the storm to pass.... it's about learning to dance in the rain~