i'm losing my sister..

-gemincer- · 03-20-2006, 09:59 PM

when i first met her.. (my sister..) i.. well, i should start off with .. she's not .. blood related. or.. in any way related. my parents don't even know her. she's.. a very goot friend, who.. is.. called. my sister. ok. there. now.
when i first met her.. i didn't.. tell her. my problem. (my problem with the .. transsexual thing.. i just told her, right off, that i was male, and.. i was used to lying back then. not really lying, but not.. telling the whole truth, i suppose.. hafoo. well.. like.. it's not a lie for me, but.. to.. oh i'll just go ahead and say it. to NORMAL people.. it is.
.. i made the mistake of telling her, (quite by accident, it slipped out.) that i phoned my boyfriend (yes, i'm gay, you can't kick me off of here.) first. and.. not her. at all. why? because.. i'm.. not particularly fond of phones, being.. my condition.. bah.
.. now she's going all.. "do what you want with your life.. i don't have any say over anything. who am i to stop you?" and.. it really really hurts. because before, many times it would be more like.. "you are MINE!! MWAHAHA!! and i love you, and you love me, and i am your big sister forever." .. it's.. like.. she's a stranger. and .. i don't think i can handle that. for the longest time, she's all i had. ..
i'm just wondering.. if i should actually go ahead and tell her about it. i wanted to do it in person, but.. it looks like i'm going to lose her either way, whether i do tell her or not.. i don't know. i can't handle things. i'm terrible with words.
and crying doesn't solve anything, but that doesn't seem to stop me. lol

moink75 · 03-20-2006, 10:10 PM

Was she really there for you when you needed her the most. If she was a true friend, whatever you had to say would not matter. This is coming from a "normal" point of view. Let me just say, we are all human beings. To h**l with closed minded people. You do what you have to do. Things will work out. I would bet that there are people looking out for you but you might not know it

Tigris · 03-21-2006, 10:43 AM

You've given her a shock! She thought she knew everything about you and suddenly you tell her this. Give her time to come to terms with the new information. Whatever you do DON'T burden her with anymore until she's had time to adjust.

I've been married twice and recently gone through a divorce (14 years marriage) and had to tell my family I'm a Lesbian. I'm 42! Yes they are totally shocked! I've not only been in denial but I've struggled through life knowing what the consequences would be when they did find out!

A few years ago I did warn my 2 sisters I thought I was Bi. One said that ok she knows but she didn't want to think about it! The other said that if our Father found out I'd never see her small family unit again! That hurt me because it meant I wouldn't see my nephew again and we're very close!

Unfortunately on Christmas Eve my so called Best Friend 'outed me' to some of my extended family! I had no choice but to tell my Father. I know he was hurting because there were tears in his eyes but he said, 'It's your life you do what you want with it.' I haven't seen them since then but that's not unusual for me. I've always been independent.

I get the feeling they think I'm a totally different person to the one I grew up as but I'm not! We've carried our own burdens for a long time before we decide to 'come out' this problem is theirs not ours!

If she loves you she will eventually come around to accepting it.

Good luck and take care.

UT · 03-21-2006, 02:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by -gemincer-

well.. like.. it's not a lie for me, but.. to.. oh i'll just go ahead and say it. to NORMAL people.. it is.

You -are- normal. the definition to normal is very vague... I see myself as a normal person and I'm saying that you didn't lie. What's a lie and what's not is really a matter of opinion. Considering your situation you can't really say that you lied. Just because you're not... physically complete doesn't mean that you aren't a guy. It means that something went wrong but that can be corrected. loosing my point now... you didn't lie. You were as honest as you could be. Just like coming out, this too, is something really big. Probably even bigger than coming out... definately bigger than that. You are true to yourself and you've found someone who loves you for who you are on you inside. Your boyfriend will be by your side.

Quote:

Originally Posted by -gemincer-

.. i made the mistake of telling her, (quite by accident, it slipped out.) that i phoned my boyfriend (yes, i'm gay, you can't kick me off of here.) first. and.. not her. at all. why? because.. i'm.. not particularly fond of phones, being.. my condition.. bah.

Just the fact that you have this affliction gives you all the right in the world to be here.. and I wouldn't let anyone kick your cute butt out.

Quote:

Originally Posted by -gemincer-

i'm just wondering.. if i should actually go ahead and tell her about it. i wanted to do it in person, but.. it looks like i'm going to lose her either way, whether i do tell her or not.. i don't know. i can't handle things. i'm terrible with words.
and crying doesn't solve anything, but that doesn't seem to stop me. lol

Now, with key in hand, I shouldn't make any comments... I just want you to know that there are people who does care about you and will always stand by you.

-gemincer- · 03-21-2006, 11:11 PM

awwws... tank you, tank you..i loves you peoples.. it's all better now. o.o it's amazing. it's like.. she.. well, she had no problems with it. i told her. and ..now.. i feel odd that i did, like.. it's always been that way.. i guess she just.. is special. yes. she's special. tank you all.
and..
*huggles bf tightly* =^^= loves you.

UT · 03-22-2006, 07:45 AM

*huggles tight back* I love you too sweetie.

03-20-2006, 09:59 PM	#1
-gemincer- Offline Member Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: canada somewhere.. Gender: Male Age: 20 Posts: 63	i'm losing my sister.. when i first met her.. (my sister..) i.. well, i should start off with .. she's not .. blood related. or.. in any way related. my parents don't even know her. she's.. a very goot friend, who.. is.. called. my sister. ok. there. now. when i first met her.. i didn't.. tell her. my problem. (my problem with the .. transsexual thing.. i just told her, right off, that i was male, and.. i was used to lying back then. not really lying, but not.. telling the whole truth, i suppose.. hafoo. well.. like.. it's not a lie for me, but.. to.. oh i'll just go ahead and say it. to NORMAL people.. it is. .. i made the mistake of telling her, (quite by accident, it slipped out.) that i phoned my boyfriend (yes, i'm gay, you can't kick me off of here.) first. and.. not her. at all. why? because.. i'm.. not particularly fond of phones, being.. my condition.. bah. .. now she's going all.. "do what you want with your life.. i don't have any say over anything. who am i to stop you?" and.. it really really hurts. because before, many times it would be more like.. "you are MINE!! MWAHAHA!! and i love you, and you love me, and i am your big sister forever." .. it's.. like.. she's a stranger. and .. i don't think i can handle that. for the longest time, she's all i had. .. i'm just wondering.. if i should actually go ahead and tell her about it. i wanted to do it in person, but.. it looks like i'm going to lose her either way, whether i do tell her or not.. i don't know. i can't handle things. i'm terrible with words. and crying doesn't solve anything, but that doesn't seem to stop me. lol __________________ something something... kings and vagabonds.. whatever. yeah. bye bye meine liebe herr..when you're alone and life is making you lonely you can always go... downtown..

03-21-2006, 11:11 PM	#5
-gemincer- Offline Member Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: canada somewhere.. Gender: Male Age: 20 Posts: 63	awwws... tank you, tank you..i loves you peoples.. it's all better now. o.o it's amazing. it's like.. she.. well, she had no problems with it. i told her. and ..now.. i feel odd that i did, like.. it's always been that way.. i guess she just.. is special. yes. she's special. tank you all. and.. huggles bf tightly =^^= loves you. __________________ something something... kings and vagabonds.. whatever. yeah. bye bye meine liebe herr..when you're alone and life is making you lonely you can always go... downtown..

03-22-2006, 07:45 AM	#6
UT Offline Member Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: Sweden Gender: Male Age: 21 Posts: 355	huggles tight back I love you too sweetie. __________________ i drew you the prettiest rainbow..

03-20-2006, 10:10 PM	#2
moink75 Offline Member Join Date: Mar 2006 Posts: 158	Was she really there for you when you needed her the most. If she was a true friend, whatever you had to say would not matter. This is coming from a "normal" point of view. Let me just say, we are all human beings. To h**l with closed minded people. You do what you have to do. Things will work out. I would bet that there are people looking out for you but you might not know it

03-21-2006, 10:43 AM	#3
Tigris Offline Silver Member Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: England Gender: Female Age: 46 Posts: 3,556	You've given her a shock! She thought she knew everything about you and suddenly you tell her this. Give her time to come to terms with the new information. Whatever you do DON'T burden her with anymore until she's had time to adjust. I've been married twice and recently gone through a divorce (14 years marriage) and had to tell my family I'm a Lesbian. I'm 42! Yes they are totally shocked! I've not only been in denial but I've struggled through life knowing what the consequences would be when they did find out! A few years ago I did warn my 2 sisters I thought I was Bi. One said that ok she knows but she didn't want to think about it! The other said that if our Father found out I'd never see her small family unit again! That hurt me because it meant I wouldn't see my nephew again and we're very close! Unfortunately on Christmas Eve my so called Best Friend 'outed me' to some of my extended family! I had no choice but to tell my Father. I know he was hurting because there were tears in his eyes but he said, 'It's your life you do what you want with it.' I haven't seen them since then but that's not unusual for me. I've always been independent. I get the feeling they think I'm a totally different person to the one I grew up as but I'm not! We've carried our own burdens for a long time before we decide to 'come out' this problem is theirs not ours! If she loves you she will eventually come around to accepting it. Good luck and take care.