Virul flu + Broken heart + Boredom to the point of nausea = Clinical depression !!!

Hey guys… I don't know how many of you know my « story » ; was with guy at college, never been so happy in my life, makes all these plans for us, breaks up with me, see him everyday, flirts with me sometimes, has new girlfriend. Ok its been over 2 months and I'm getting on with my life, putting more effort into studies, having the ability to enjoy myself with accepting that there will just always be a hole in my heart until someone comes and fixes it some day. BUT I got ill, and I've been lying in bed all day awake, and running of things to think about, I thought of HIM. I shut my eyes, and went through the whole story, right from September when we first met, watching how everything developed… Then it got to the part were we had our first kiss and i remembered it extremely vividly, with all the incredible emotions that came with it, the few days that lead up to it, the water fight…and I had to cut off the story and I began to cry . I thought I was over everything, but clearly not !! The only reason I thought I was, was because I didn't reflect on what happened, what I lost, to such detail! But when I do, it's like a reality check. I don't think I'll EVER feel that happy ever again ! I know it sounds narrow minded but everything that happened between us was like the stuff you see in the movies - it was amazing ! Guys, I'm DEVASTED. All I'll ever do is think of those times with immense yearning for them. Anyway, I shut my eyes and carried on the story until the break up and discovering new girlfriend. It's been nearly 3 months…ok I just realised there's not THAT much point to this post, but just wondering if anyone has felt the same sort of thing recently… do reply

When you are sick your body gets way out of whack. I myself have depression and take anti-depressants to lead a normal life. But when I get ill it is like I'm not taking anything at all and I crash into a depression. I have the flu right now like you do so I know exactly what you are feeling.

The only advice I can give you is to let this run it's course. Once you are feeling better physically I think your mental state will improve as well. But for the next couple of days you are probably going to feel like crap sorry to say.

Hang in there Hunny.

Thanks avman for your response! I think it's probably because I literally have nothing to do all day but lie there and think to myself for HOURS. And really, there's nothing worse than that for someone who's trying to forget! Will hang in there, can't wait til I'm better again.

I agree..

When you have too much time to think, you really start to drive yourself crazy....

Plus you're a little delusional and your body is out of whack so you're probably over emotional.

My advice: watch a movie, read a book, listen to music...don't sit there in silence letting the happy memories wash over you! People have a tendency to forget the reality of situations once they're over because you seem to vividly remember only the good times.

Oh yeah, so true. Thanks Faerie

Hunny,

It's very easy to get into a negative rut - especially when you're physically ill. It's normal to think about your ex at times - this is part of the healing process. After you're well and back on your feet, try changing up your routine. Work out or change your current workout routine, occupy your time with activities that make you feel good about yourself, and spend time with friends.

Nobody will come along and fix your heart. This is something you'll have to do on your own. This is part of your life that you'll appreciate later because it's when you really get to know who you are and what you can overcome. Good luck.

ME fix my own heart??? How does that work? I was just waiting for another guy to come along that I fall in love with who loves me back - thought that might take a while, but I didn't think there was another way.