psychological question

workaholic · 10-12-2005, 04:09 PM

Is there a psychological reason why some of us go out with a bunch of people who could be friends, yet somehow we're lazy or forget to follow up with those people? Then, it's usually 3 months later, maybe longer when we meet up the people again? How many of you hate when that happens? Any solutions?

GettingOverIt · 10-12-2005, 04:44 PM

Well, you could contact them more.... I mean, *YOU* could make a conscious effort to make contact... The irony here is that some of these very people may be wondering the very same thing.....

darkblue · 10-12-2005, 05:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by GettingOverIt

The irony here is that some of these very people may be wondering the very same thing.....

Couldn't agree more.

Msnak · 10-12-2005, 08:07 PM

I hate that. When you connect with someone on a friendship level and then nothing comes of it.

But I'm very used to it, as a former military dependent, it's all I know. I have started testing some of my friendships, going for a time and not contacting, just to see if they'd be in touch. I've only lost one person; it's been 1 year and five months since that happened.

I know that one-sided friendships are not healthy. Life is too short to do all the work.

There doesn't have to be 50-50, but there needs to be some type of effort. And yes, I've had people in my life I liked but I didn't initiate the friendship. Funny, one of the most annoying people I ever met became my best friend! Maybe she wore down my defenses?

Alabama · 10-12-2005, 11:15 PM

I'm trying to make an effort to keep in contact with people. I email them every few weeks on what's going in my life. Yet nonetheless I'll get a response from some, and never from others. That's just the way life is.

Itsok · 10-14-2005, 04:22 PM

who knows if there's a reason, but it's hard to keep in touch with people, especially after high school.

Keep in contact via email, and phone pople. Don't lose touch with people you really care about. Be the one to initiate the phone call. Some of my friends never call, but I make a point of calling them once every few weeks.

I also know someone who sends out a "60 second update" once a month telling what he is doing with his life and what's new and exciting. That is a really smart idea I think.

10-12-2005, 04:09 PM	#1
workaholic Offline Member Join Date: Jun 2005 Gender: Male Posts: 135	psychological question Is there a psychological reason why some of us go out with a bunch of people who could be friends, yet somehow we're lazy or forget to follow up with those people? Then, it's usually 3 months later, maybe longer when we meet up the people again? How many of you hate when that happens? Any solutions?

10-12-2005, 04:44 PM	#2
GettingOverIt Offline Member Join Date: Nov 2004 Location: Out There... Waaaay out there... Gender: Male Age: 40 Posts: 638	Well, you could contact them more.... I mean, YOU could make a conscious effort to make contact... The irony here is that some of these very people may be wondering the very same thing..... __________________ Listen to your heart... Your head is too busy thinking to know what you really want....

10-12-2005, 11:15 PM	#5
Alabama Offline Bronze Member Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: USA Gender: Male Age: 23 Posts: 1,407	I'm trying to make an effort to keep in contact with people. I email them every few weeks on what's going in my life. Yet nonetheless I'll get a response from some, and never from others. That's just the way life is. __________________ Every day you may make progress. Every step may be fruitful. Yet there will stretch out before you an ever-lengthening, ever-ascending, ever-improving path. You know you will never get to the end of the journey. But this, so far from discouraging, only adds to the joy and glory of the climb. Sir Winston Churchill "If you have no confidence in self, you are twice defeated in the race of life. With confidence, you have won before you have started." ~ Marcus Garvey

10-14-2005, 04:22 PM	#6
Itsok Offline Silver Member Join Date: Oct 2005 Location: Where dreams are made Posts: 354	hmmm who knows if there's a reason, but it's hard to keep in touch with people, especially after high school. Keep in contact via email, and phone pople. Don't lose touch with people you really care about. Be the one to initiate the phone call. Some of my friends never call, but I make a point of calling them once every few weeks. I also know someone who sends out a "60 second update" once a month telling what he is doing with his life and what's new and exciting. That is a really smart idea I think. __________________ _________________________________ "Finish each day and be done with it. You have done what you could; some blunders and absurdities have crept in; forget them as soon as you can. Tomorrow is a new day; you shall begin it serenely and with too high a spirit to be encumbered with your old nonsense." -Ralph Waldo Emerson “All that we are is the result of what we have thought.The mind is everything. What we think we become.” -Buddha Never be bullied into silence. Never allow yourself to be made a victim. Accept no ones definition of your life; define yourself." -Harvey Fierstein

10-12-2005, 08:07 PM	#4
Msnak Offline Member Join Date: Aug 2005 Age: 32 Posts: 305	I hate that. When you connect with someone on a friendship level and then nothing comes of it. But I'm very used to it, as a former military dependent, it's all I know. I have started testing some of my friendships, going for a time and not contacting, just to see if they'd be in touch. I've only lost one person; it's been 1 year and five months since that happened. I know that one-sided friendships are not healthy. Life is too short to do all the work. There doesn't have to be 50-50, but there needs to be some type of effort. And yes, I've had people in my life I liked but I didn't initiate the friendship. Funny, one of the most annoying people I ever met became my best friend! Maybe she wore down my defenses?