Body language of a shy guy who is interested?

What are the give away signs that a shy guy is attracted to you? There is a guy at work who I think is really nice but he's known for being a little, though not painfully, shy. I think he likes me because sometimes I catch him watching me and before we got friendly with each other there was a lot of eye contact accross the room. But then sometimes I get signs that suggest the opposite for example it's always me who initiates conversation, though most of the time he does become smiley and talkative and responsive when I do. But then there is the odd time when conversation is a bit stunted or even non-existent because I don't initiate anything. Also I've noticed sometimes that he will avoid my gaze when we are chatting quite close to one another which makes me think he's trying to tell me he isn't interested. I'm quite confused... any opinions?

From what you're saying,and I've recently overcome my shyness so I can kind of relate to the guy , I'd say he actually -is- interested, plain and simple. If he's not talking to you much, he actually probably is. And like you said, there are times when he sort of does show hints of being fond of you, this should come as a sign. Sometimes things slip through the shyness.

yeah, I'd have to agree, I am sort of shy, in a way, and avoiding eye contact with someone you're interested in is common, maybe more common than keeping eye contact, after all, he is shy. At least for me, maintaining a conversation with a girl Im interested in is not the easiest thing ever and sometimes it is easier of she does more of the talking

Try and judge him each time you guys meet, talk, or see each other.. If he warms up to you quicker and easier each meeting, or run-in, then he's into you.. One thing you can do to make it easier, is when he makes a "pass" at you, compliments you, or says something, even if it's cheesy, or off the wall, reciprocate it back, it'll build his confidence and make him open up much much faster.

If he can maintain eye contact with you while talking, and doesn't wonder off too many times, I'd say your doing a good job of getting him to open up.

I don't know about him, but when I see a beautiful girl that I like, I will glance alot, but sometimes I don't think I have any chance with her so I don't try to initiate conversation. If he doesnt make perfect eye contact during conversation, hes probably just anxious. I try to avoid it, but I find myself doing the same thing sometimes.

When you're shy, eye contact and conversation with someone you really like can be extremely overwhelming. Shy people already have to deal with their usual insecurities, but when you add in the pressure of impressing someone they genuinely like, it's no surprise conversation is stilted etc. Btw, if a shy person avoids you all together, that's an extremely good sign.

Seriously from everything you've said, it sounds like he really likes you, but due to his shyness doesn't feel comfortable doing anything that would make himself vulnerable to rejection like initiating conversation etc. If he's responsive and talkative when you initiate contact, that's a really positive sign. Being talkative is out of character for shy folks, so obviously you're having some odd magical effect on him.

Rather than keep guessing what he thinks, why not invite him out for coffee, ice cream, or lunch and have fun getting to know him better? His reactions sound like they're worth studying a little more.

but what if the shy guy acts the way described, and he KNOWS you like him, but it's been a month since you went out with him (which you asked him to)? Wouldn't knowing that you like him boost his confidence to ask you out? What would be the hold up?

What should you do to encourage him to ask you out?

but what if the shy guy acts the way described, and he KNOWS you like him, but it's been a month since you went out with him (which you asked him to)? Wouldn't knowing that you like him boost his confidence to ask you out? What would be the hold up?

What should you do to encourage him to ask you out?

Ask him out ten more ten more times. If he's shy he will still have doubts that you like him after only one date. You may actually have to kiss him before that fact sinks in.

Btw, if a shy person avoids you all together, that's an extremely good sign.

 

Sorry to barge in, but could you explain that? That doesn't seem to make a lot of sense, and though I believe you, I don't quite get it...

 

To the topic creator, it does appear as if this guy likes you. I would suggest getting to know him a bit more -- it's not like he'll mind you initiating more conversations with him if he likes you! You'll be able to tell if he's not interested if he doesn't pay attention to you when you're talking to him.

You'll be able to tell if he's not interested if he doesn't pay attention to you when you're talking to him.

I don't know about that, that seems to be going a bit far. I don't ever remember a guy not paying attention to a conversation I was having with him, and I certainly wouldn't assume that every guy I have ever conversed with was attracted to/interested in me.

He may just admire you -or like you - but doesn't feel (or want) the need to take it any further. Just keep it friendly and open and see what happens.

I am a shy girl who likes a shy guy and I also think it's hard to tell whether a shy guy is interested or not interested, because their signs may to be too subtle to pick up and they fear rejection. I think you have to be subtle. It is frustrating as we need a sign sometimes. I do think that avoiding someone can be a sign they are interested. I know I occasionally do that as I am sometimes too scared to bump into the guy I like and don't want him thinking I am following him or something. I have been in the situation where I tried to make conversation with someone and they didn't seem to make much of an effort back and I think that really makes you wonder if they are interested or not. I know that even though I am shy if someone I liked made an effort to talk to me I would try to talk back. Although sometimes I just don't know what to say to them. It depends what the conversation is. Find topics that you know he is really interested in as that will bring him out of his shell. If someone talks about something I am not so interested in then even if I am interested in THEM chances are I might not speak much as I just don't know what to say on the subject. I don't think avoiding your gaze means anything though.

but what if the shy guy acts the way described, and he KNOWS you like him, but it's been a month since you went out with him (which you asked him to)? Wouldn't knowing that you like him boost his confidence to ask you out? What would be the hold up?

What should you do to encourage him to ask you out?

If you corner him and all he can manage to do is blubber out something nonsensical such as "I like peanut butter" then there is an excellent chance that he is highly interested in you.

I registered here just to say, "L O L!" That had me laughin my socks off.

I do have a question though, it's quite a complicated situation, but there's this shy guy that I like and im not sure he feels the same. I met him last year in class (high schooler) and I started talking to him, trying to make a friend as I would anyone else. At first I wasnt attracted to him but I became curious of him because he was a mystery to me! Then all of a sudden I started getting nervous whenever I talked to him, and I'd catch looking at me ALL the time. Long story short: I told my friend, she sent him a note (which I didnt appreciate) at the end of the year asking if he liked me and he replied, "...strongly as a friend Now this year he still stares but is in and out of avoidance with me. Ex: Putting his head down when he sees me, or walking infront of me which is when I have no choice but to see him." SOOO...should I shrug this little infatuation off or approach even after the long awkward silence...?

Shy guys will often give off the exact opposite signs of what you would traditionally expect someone who is interested in someone would give.They may avoid you,talk to you very little.Shy people generally freeze whenever they are around someone they are attracted to.You have to break down there self imposed barriers,it takes them much longer to get comfortable around people ,let alone someone they are attracted to.Be patient and understanding.They will also disengage completely at the slightest sign that you are not interested in them,so be on your toes whenever you are around him.

Is that a joke? Because that just makes us females think "ok.. I am obviously doing something wrong, he doesn't like me. next!"

I'm a shy guy and personally I think it's very important to be patient and not get frustrated. Personally it takes me a very long time to break down the barriers I automatically build even when trying to make friends let alone girlfriends. But once I do, and the relationship girl/guy hasn't given up I become very talkative with them and will trust them with my life. And trust me, when a guy gets MORE shy around you it means they really like you, it's simply their instinctive reaction. People aren't described as being shy because they are very outgoing and easy to talk with. I don't know how many great girls I've missed because I simply can't tear down the barrier fast enough, so I'm telling you, be patient.

Max

God bless ya, Max. That's exactly what I needed to hear!!!

God bless ya, Max. That's exactly what I needed to hear!!!

 

Agree. Patience is a great reminder!

I'm PAINFULLY shy. Whenever I see my crush(I made a thread about her. She's a co-worker.) I physically start feeling like my body is shaking. It is impossible for me to make eye contact with her. She always engages me in conversation first. Never ever vice versa. She probably thinks I don't like her or barely notice her but she doesn't know that I think about her every second of the day, everyday.

awwww..you guys are sooooo shy, it would be annoying if it wasn't so cute. I think you guys need to be a little more courageous..... nothing ventured nothing gained.....as the saying goes....I have a huge crush on a shy guy who comes into the coffee shop where I work and he acts very much like the descriptions in this thread. He has a good job, he is very attractive (with read hair and blue eyes gorgeous smile), he's taller than me (huge bonus), sometimes he just has no smile for me and sometimes he smiles at me with a little twinkle in his eye, I have caught him looking at me up and down a few times the attention is nice but I wish he would ask me out already, I don;t think he has a g/f. I just think he would rather be without me than take the risk of being rejected. Who knows, all I know that he's adorable and I think no matter what he does I am not taking personally I just think that he is really shy. I know shyness is something most of us have to deal with our entire lives, but he is almost forty I think ......by this age I just feel that men should have more courage. BUt that's just me!! Good luck to all!

A shy guy will stare at you when you are not looking but as soon as you turn his way he will divert his eyes elsewhere.

A shy guy will find it difficult to strike up a conversation with you because he is nervous when you are around. If he talks to you he might avoid eye contact.

My personal opionon is that when someone acts in an abnormal way around you - too loud, too quiet, too little eye contact, too much eye contact - whatever, then that is a huge sign that they like you. If they viewed you as a friend then they would just act normally around you, and if they didn't like you then they would avoid you. In this case, he's not avoiding so I'm pretty sure he would like you.

There are 12 signs that a guy likes you at link removed.

Im also a shy guy and its annoying. As others have said though, patience is key. The walls we have built around ourselves take time to get by. We dotn usually do anything bold because fear of rejection. We have a million thoughts going through our heads when talking to a person we like (at least I do). Some being "Does she like me?, Is she taken? Why does she do that? Whats it mean?" Its crazy. For me though, what people that I work with do is bring up a strong intrest of mine and I usually open up alot for that little bit. So I suggest starting there, he could surprise you with how much he talks