is girl to close with her guy friends?

theflipsideoflife21 · 08-08-2005, 05:35 PM

my boyfriend and i are very close. we've been going out for 9 months now. but me and him have this problem. he is very annoyed with me having way more guy friends then gurls, particularaly guys that are from past relationships. hes told me many times that i am NOT aloud to see them...that is loud and clear. i understand that any guy wudn't want his girl hanging around any other guy. but i dont see why he cant understand that we are just friends...nothing more. and alot of them are not even my type. there are two guys inparticular that he absolutly dispises. one being my ex...about a year ago he cheated on me..but we still remain friends and he has a gf and has asked if i wanted 2 hang with the both of them and i said no because my boyfriend says he will break up with me. another is my best friend mike, whos gf is very close friends with me. hes the type of guy who listens very well if i have a problem so i enjoy talking with him...i guess my question is...
....is it wrong for me to want to hang out with my guyfriends, and not always wanting my boyfriend there. or do you think he is being just a tad over protective?

DragonGirl724 · 08-08-2005, 05:42 PM

THIS RULE GOES OUT TO EVERYONE!!!

THE SECOND YOUR SIGNIFICANT OTHER ORDERS YOU AROUND & DEMANDS YOU DITCH YOUR FRIENDS, GET RID OF HIM/HER!

tell them, they can go PLAY PARENT with someone else!

for best results: have zero tolerance for jealousy & ignorant attitudes from the start!

-DG724

**Hope75** · 08-08-2005, 05:44 PM

Your bf does not have the right to tell you who you can and cannot see. If you haven't given him a reason not to trust you (as in: cheating or lying to him) than he has no worries. Why not invite him out with these friends so he can see what you are all about?

If you are honest and faithful then this is his problem alone and any guy that ordered me around would be history in the blink of an eye-- but that's just me.

What do YOU think?

darkblue · 08-08-2005, 06:08 PM

One of my closest friends is female. And her boyfriend hates the fact that she spends so much time with me; and is so close to me.

He has asked her to 'choose' in the past, but now he realizes that she won't pick and if she did, it would be much more uncertain that he wished it to be. He would like her to 'ditch' everything to be with him.

Unfortunately that's not how the world works. It is how jealousy works however.

Never give in because then he'll think he can walk all over you.

Jinx · 08-08-2005, 06:26 PM

For some men they think about how they feel about you and think every man does as well and all competition.

No man has any right to tell the woman who and who not to see and regulate her life to his tastes. My idea has always been with these sort of men, once the male friends have been removed, what will it be next? Isolating you to home so you don't have any interaction with men outside? Some even become paranoid that men may be sneaking in while he is gone giving him reason to leading into abuse both physical and verbal.

Either way it is a bad situation that you should remove yourself from before it progresses in anyway. Friends are more important than any jealous man will ever be. Keep in mind what friends have provided over the years versus what a jealous bf is trying to do to you now.

DragonGirl724 · 08-08-2005, 07:00 PM

sometimes one falls in love with their best friend, it happens. but if you are in love with your BF/GF they should understand that they are the one youre with & youre not with the other guy/girl & they need to get over it! if the thought plagues them such then they need to reconsider being with you, b/c you are not readjusting your social network, & leave those who have always been theer for you, to meet the desires of a BF or GF.

they got to be kidding themselves.

-DG724

08-08-2005, 05:35 PM	#1
theflipsideoflife21 Offline Member Join Date: Aug 2005 Age: 19 Posts: 11	is girl to close with her guy friends? my boyfriend and i are very close. we've been going out for 9 months now. but me and him have this problem. he is very annoyed with me having way more guy friends then gurls, particularaly guys that are from past relationships. hes told me many times that i am NOT aloud to see them...that is loud and clear. i understand that any guy wudn't want his girl hanging around any other guy. but i dont see why he cant understand that we are just friends...nothing more. and alot of them are not even my type. there are two guys inparticular that he absolutly dispises. one being my ex...about a year ago he cheated on me..but we still remain friends and he has a gf and has asked if i wanted 2 hang with the both of them and i said no because my boyfriend says he will break up with me. another is my best friend mike, whos gf is very close friends with me. hes the type of guy who listens very well if i have a problem so i enjoy talking with him...i guess my question is... ....is it wrong for me to want to hang out with my guyfriends, and not always wanting my boyfriend there. or do you think he is being just a tad over protective?

08-08-2005, 05:42 PM	#2
DragonGirl724 Offline Gold Member Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: USA Gender: Female Age: 26 Posts: 2,414	THIS RULE GOES OUT TO EVERYONE!!! THE SECOND YOUR SIGNIFICANT OTHER ORDERS YOU AROUND & DEMANDS YOU DITCH YOUR FRIENDS, GET RID OF HIM/HER! tell them, they can go PLAY PARENT with someone else! for best results: have zero tolerance for jealousy & ignorant attitudes from the start! -DG724 __________________ Don't Tread on Me. www.CampaignForLiberty.com

08-08-2005, 05:44 PM	#3
Hope75 Offline Super Moderator Join Date: Dec 2004 Location: kitteh ville Gender: Female Age: 33 Posts: 12,512	Your bf does not have the right to tell you who you can and cannot see. If you haven't given him a reason not to trust you (as in: cheating or lying to him) than he has no worries. Why not invite him out with these friends so he can see what you are all about? If you are honest and faithful then this is his problem alone and any guy that ordered me around would be history in the blink of an eye-- but that's just me. What do YOU think? __________________ Muffin cats need love too. Please refer to the forum rules before posting: http://www.enotalone.com/forum/forum-rules.php Mama to a beautiful baby girl born 6-25-09. :)

08-08-2005, 06:08 PM	#4
darkblue Offline Platinum Member Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Glasgow, Scotland. Gender: Male Posts: 5,085	One of my closest friends is female. And her boyfriend hates the fact that she spends so much time with me; and is so close to me. He has asked her to 'choose' in the past, but now he realizes that she won't pick and if she did, it would be much more uncertain that he wished it to be. He would like her to 'ditch' everything to be with him. Unfortunately that's not how the world works. It is how jealousy works however. Never give in because then he'll think he can walk all over you. __________________ _________________ Aut vincere aut mori. "Whoever loves; becomes humble. Those who love have, so to speak, pawned a part of their narcissism." - Sigmund Freud Man is nothing else but that which he makes of himself. That is the first principle of existentialism - J.P. Sartre

08-08-2005, 07:00 PM	#6
DragonGirl724 Offline Gold Member Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: USA Gender: Female Age: 26 Posts: 2,414	sometimes one falls in love with their best friend, it happens. but if you are in love with your BF/GF they should understand that they are the one youre with & youre not with the other guy/girl & they need to get over it! if the thought plagues them such then they need to reconsider being with you, b/c you are not readjusting your social network, & leave those who have always been theer for you, to meet the desires of a BF or GF. they got to be kidding themselves. -DG724 __________________ Don't Tread on Me. www.CampaignForLiberty.com

08-08-2005, 06:26 PM	#5
Jinx Offline Bronze Member Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: (Soon-to-be) Wyoming Gender: Female Posts: 649	For some men they think about how they feel about you and think every man does as well and all competition. No man has any right to tell the woman who and who not to see and regulate her life to his tastes. My idea has always been with these sort of men, once the male friends have been removed, what will it be next? Isolating you to home so you don't have any interaction with men outside? Some even become paranoid that men may be sneaking in while he is gone giving him reason to leading into abuse both physical and verbal. Either way it is a bad situation that you should remove yourself from before it progresses in anyway. Friends are more important than any jealous man will ever be. Keep in mind what friends have provided over the years versus what a jealous bf is trying to do to you now.