Why me?

lightn · 04-29-2005, 06:36 AM

Why is this happening to me? Right now life sucks for me. I hate my job, due to the fact I felt like I was demoted, I am going into a financial bind and also of course the relationship with my girl.
I just feel it is the triple effect. Everything is caving in with me. I cry at times, and I have no energy coming to work because I hate my job and then seeing my girl at work is another issue. She broke up with me 10 months ago but I felt lately I have been set back on it. Now I feel like it is a game with her. I am trying my best to avoid her but I know she will make an attempt in some how to talk to me etc. Then my job, it is causing me a financial burden. It sucks
I am there for everyone when they are down but when it comes to me where is everybody. They don;t want to hear or deal with me or get tired of me. YEs, I have been working out but sometime I have to try my best to stop crying when I am working out I want to but I don;t.
Right now nothing seems right, noting is going right and life right now sucks. If it was for the not triple effect and if it was only the double effect I would be able to handle it better but now it is too much.
I just don;t know what to do anymore. I have hope in all 3 things but then my thinking goes back is there going to be any hope.
Yes I have been looking for a new job but it is the waiting game until they make a decision and the same with girl- I care for her very much) is waiting. Sometimes I find myself thinking is it worth living and maybe I am better off not to be on earth here. I just dont want to hear there are plenty more of fish in the sea- I hate that line, not if you feel she is the one.
Sometimes I wonder what I did do wrong, but then I know I did nothing wrong with her but then the setbacks hits.

Sometimes I just want to crawl up in a hole and not coming out or run into another state or just keep running.
Right now life is not a charm.
Tom

sonjam · 04-29-2005, 07:33 AM

Tom, chin up my boy. We are all going through the same things, more or less. Firstly suicide is not an option. It is the option of a coward (I know you are not one).

When things get so difficult financially, jobwise, and love wise, then you just gotta put your shoulder to the grinding wheel and keep pushing forward. Take it one day at a time. You will see if you go to sleep tonight, you will wake up tomorrow, and it will be one day closer to happiness. You will find happiness again, you are just going through a bad patch. I Promise it will get better!

When all the world is pressing me with letter of demands, my love being killed, me losing my house and happiness, I took solice in the fact that they can take my cash, my house my everything, but I hold my life as being my most precious posession, and they could not take it. Holding on to life saved me. I now have the happiness I was waiting for, and you know what, it comes at the most unexpected times, when you think you least deserve it, and when all seems hopeless.

Hang in there. It will come.

thisisnotanexit · 04-29-2005, 06:24 PM

yeah i understand

life is not a charm for me right now either

me and gf just broke up a week ago today. things are tough, but you have to remember that things can work out. don't give up already. if it helps, get as far away from her as you can right now for some closure. keep looking for a new job. just realize that you are worth it and you can move on. you're a great, you will be happy again.

hey
before you really hurt yourself, please remember that you WILL NOT feel this way forever. i know things are hard right now, believe me, i've been there. but you will get through this. don't hate yourself for mistakes made in the past. that's the past, forget about it. just make sure you're around to live in the future. no one's perfect. believe, you're not alone. there are people out there that can help you. please talk to someone about how you're feeling. it's awesome that you're talking about it here, but you can talk to other people like your friends, family, a therapist, etc. there is help. don't give up, it's not worth it. hey,
hang in there, you're gonna be ok. life is hard sometimes, believe me i've had these same feelings. but believe me, suicide is NOT worth it. you're NOT going to feel like this forever. growing up is hard, but i promise very soon there will come a day when you feel much better. you're so young, don't give up now. it's really not worth it. for now try to do things that make YOU happy. watch good movies, listen to good music, hang out with friends, TALK TO SOMEONE ABOUT HOW YOU'RE FEELING, write, read, exercise, take a walk (it's supposed to help depression). you know, try to occupy your time with things that make you happy. we're all here for you here. we all care about you. you're a special person in our eyes . please just hang in there, you are going to feel better. and again, don't be afrad to talk to more people about the way you are feeling. they are there to help you. remember, you are loved! please don't give up, you've got so much life left to live. and please don't cut yourself either. that can be so dangerous. there are healthier ways of dealing with it i promise. hey
i'm here for you, we all are. you're not alone, remember that. try your
best to stay strong and get through this, because i know you can. i've been
there.
never be afraid to ask for help, because there are people out there that
can help. it's wonderful you want to talk to us, but there are other people
out there too i promise. you're going to be ok. if you do end up cutting,
remember, stay away from wrists and scary places like that.

remember to make sure if you are considering suicide, get rid of everything that can harm you. get rid of anything tempting. tell people to help you out with this too. talking always helps, there are people who want to help you through this. get rid of anything that triggers you. hang in there, there is a better way. please check out this site

you're not alone! PLEASE check out these sites, they really help

metanoia.org/suicide/
nostigma.org
everystudent.com

lightn · 04-29-2005, 06:49 PM

Thanks thisisnotanexit and thanks sonjam. I appreciate it but I am hoping things will work out with her once I am away. I did sent her a letter and that is it, it is in her ballcourt now.
I have been looking for a new job but nothing is coming and it is all a waiting game for their decision. As for friends I do talk to them but sometimes it is hard for them to hear all of this but they don;t know how I feel about not being on earth. I do work out but still at times it does not help with the triple effect. The financial is the scary part and never been in this position.
I ended up with going home early today because I had a migraine, The last migraine was worse than this one but I know it is the stress right now. THe last one was 2 months ago. This one and the last one happened at work and this time I drove home slowly but the last one I could not.

Again thank you for your kind words, but right now I am just venting but I used to keep everything inside but I know that is not good.

I am taking one day at time.

04-29-2005, 06:36 AM	#1
lightn Offline Member Join Date: Oct 2004 Location: Flowery Branch GA Gender: Male Posts: 232	Why me? Why is this happening to me? Right now life sucks for me. I hate my job, due to the fact I felt like I was demoted, I am going into a financial bind and also of course the relationship with my girl. I just feel it is the triple effect. Everything is caving in with me. I cry at times, and I have no energy coming to work because I hate my job and then seeing my girl at work is another issue. She broke up with me 10 months ago but I felt lately I have been set back on it. Now I feel like it is a game with her. I am trying my best to avoid her but I know she will make an attempt in some how to talk to me etc. Then my job, it is causing me a financial burden. It sucks I am there for everyone when they are down but when it comes to me where is everybody. They don;t want to hear or deal with me or get tired of me. YEs, I have been working out but sometime I have to try my best to stop crying when I am working out I want to but I don;t. Right now nothing seems right, noting is going right and life right now sucks. If it was for the not triple effect and if it was only the double effect I would be able to handle it better but now it is too much. I just don;t know what to do anymore. I have hope in all 3 things but then my thinking goes back is there going to be any hope. Yes I have been looking for a new job but it is the waiting game until they make a decision and the same with girl- I care for her very much) is waiting. Sometimes I find myself thinking is it worth living and maybe I am better off not to be on earth here. I just dont want to hear there are plenty more of fish in the sea- I hate that line, not if you feel she is the one. Sometimes I wonder what I did do wrong, but then I know I did nothing wrong with her but then the setbacks hits. Sometimes I just want to crawl up in a hole and not coming out or run into another state or just keep running. Right now life is not a charm. Tom

04-29-2005, 07:33 AM	#2
sonjam Offline Member Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: SA Gender: Female Age: 37 Posts: 978	Tom, chin up my boy. We are all going through the same things, more or less. Firstly suicide is not an option. It is the option of a coward (I know you are not one). When things get so difficult financially, jobwise, and love wise, then you just gotta put your shoulder to the grinding wheel and keep pushing forward. Take it one day at a time. You will see if you go to sleep tonight, you will wake up tomorrow, and it will be one day closer to happiness. You will find happiness again, you are just going through a bad patch. I Promise it will get better! When all the world is pressing me with letter of demands, my love being killed, me losing my house and happiness, I took solice in the fact that they can take my cash, my house my everything, but I hold my life as being my most precious posession, and they could not take it. Holding on to life saved me. I now have the happiness I was waiting for, and you know what, it comes at the most unexpected times, when you think you least deserve it, and when all seems hopeless. Hang in there. It will come. __________________ About Kids... Children seldom misquote you. In fact, they usually repeat word for word what you shouldn't have said. Kids need love the most when they're acting most unlovable. The reason grandparents and grandchildren get along so well? A common enemy...

04-29-2005, 06:24 PM	#3
thisisnotanexit Offline Member Join Date: Jun 2004 Posts: 582	yeah i understand life is not a charm for me right now either me and gf just broke up a week ago today. things are tough, but you have to remember that things can work out. don't give up already. if it helps, get as far away from her as you can right now for some closure. keep looking for a new job. just realize that you are worth it and you can move on. you're a great, you will be happy again. hey before you really hurt yourself, please remember that you WILL NOT feel this way forever. i know things are hard right now, believe me, i've been there. but you will get through this. don't hate yourself for mistakes made in the past. that's the past, forget about it. just make sure you're around to live in the future. no one's perfect. believe, you're not alone. there are people out there that can help you. please talk to someone about how you're feeling. it's awesome that you're talking about it here, but you can talk to other people like your friends, family, a therapist, etc. there is help. don't give up, it's not worth it. hey, hang in there, you're gonna be ok. life is hard sometimes, believe me i've had these same feelings. but believe me, suicide is NOT worth it. you're NOT going to feel like this forever. growing up is hard, but i promise very soon there will come a day when you feel much better. you're so young, don't give up now. it's really not worth it. for now try to do things that make YOU happy. watch good movies, listen to good music, hang out with friends, TALK TO SOMEONE ABOUT HOW YOU'RE FEELING, write, read, exercise, take a walk (it's supposed to help depression). you know, try to occupy your time with things that make you happy. we're all here for you here. we all care about you. you're a special person in our eyes . please just hang in there, you are going to feel better. and again, don't be afrad to talk to more people about the way you are feeling. they are there to help you. remember, you are loved! please don't give up, you've got so much life left to live. and please don't cut yourself either. that can be so dangerous. there are healthier ways of dealing with it i promise. hey i'm here for you, we all are. you're not alone, remember that. try your best to stay strong and get through this, because i know you can. i've been there. never be afraid to ask for help, because there are people out there that can help. it's wonderful you want to talk to us, but there are other people out there too i promise. you're going to be ok. if you do end up cutting, remember, stay away from wrists and scary places like that. remember to make sure if you are considering suicide, get rid of everything that can harm you. get rid of anything tempting. tell people to help you out with this too. talking always helps, there are people who want to help you through this. get rid of anything that triggers you. hang in there, there is a better way. please check out this site you're not alone! PLEASE check out these sites, they really help metanoia.org/suicide/ nostigma.org everystudent.com

04-29-2005, 06:49 PM	#4
lightn Offline Member Join Date: Oct 2004 Location: Flowery Branch GA Gender: Male Posts: 232	Thanks thisisnotanexit and thanks sonjam. I appreciate it but I am hoping things will work out with her once I am away. I did sent her a letter and that is it, it is in her ballcourt now. I have been looking for a new job but nothing is coming and it is all a waiting game for their decision. As for friends I do talk to them but sometimes it is hard for them to hear all of this but they don;t know how I feel about not being on earth. I do work out but still at times it does not help with the triple effect. The financial is the scary part and never been in this position. I ended up with going home early today because I had a migraine, The last migraine was worse than this one but I know it is the stress right now. THe last one was 2 months ago. This one and the last one happened at work and this time I drove home slowly but the last one I could not. Again thank you for your kind words, but right now I am just venting but I used to keep everything inside but I know that is not good. I am taking one day at time.