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how do you know a girl is staring at you b/c she likes you?


ninjakid944

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this is long, so bear with me. you would think that when a girl you don't know is having eye contact with you for more than a few seconds and sometimes more than once, or if she looks like she's lookin at you and tryin to not make it obvious, things should be lookin good, right? well, i've had one girl do each of those and they essentially weren't interested once I asked them to get together. Now, I don't know whether a girl is staring at me hopin that I'll talk to her or if she's just lookin out of curiosity. There was this really attractive girl sittin next to me to the right in class 2day. Today, every once in a while, I would see her look in my direction, but I was too shy to look right at her in the middle of class to see if it was at me. Whenever she sat in front of me, I never noticed her lookin to her left as much as she did today, so that made me wonder. As class ended, a few people started packin up real fast as the teacher was still talkin and she was one of them. I was thinkin, if she's this much in a hurry, then she wasn't really hopin I'd talk to her. She already had her jacket on and her books in her bookbag. I just sat there with my books still opened. When class officially ended, I thought she'd be out the door, but for someone that had all their stuff packed up, she took very long to leave. I was like, damn, she packed up so quick, now she's gettin up from her desk in slow motion. I couldn't shake this feeling like, is this on purpose? I was too shy to talk to her and it looked like she was lookin at me out the corner of her eye as I was packin up, but I left before her anyway. It's just that I've been down this road b4 with another girl who I thought was starin at me, but actually had a boyfriend already and didn't seem interested once I talked to her. What do y'all think about this, especially the girls? Thanks a lot...

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yeah, sometimes I stare at guys just because I think they're interesting (or said something interesting in class) but I'm not really interested in a romantic way. And sometimes I just flirt for fun, or to be friendly, but am not interested. I think I may lead guys on sometimes but then I sorta retreat or just act friendly so they don't get hurt, and realize that I don't want anything more than just to be friends.

 

But in most cases, if you don't know a girl too well & she keeps staring at you (and perhaps smiles when your eyes connect) that is *definitely* a good sign! Especially if you feel a connection between you two. As a girl I can usually feel when I "connect" or "click" with another person that is different than just a normal friendship...like there's some attraction there, you know? But sometimes, alas, I have been deceived and hurt

 

I guess the only way to find out is to talk to her & see how you guys connect, if you get along well together! Start talking about the class or something, and if you guys get along that's great! =)

 

Hope that helped,

 

fallen

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Hey,

 

I've gone through the same exact thing that you go through over the last four years of my life. And I follow the same pattern as you: out of the corner of my eye I see them looking in my direction and most of the time I don't turn to look at them to see if it's me they're looking at or if it's a mirage. I had three particular girls that I saw a few times a week and this scenario came up. But because I am incredibly shy, I did nothing to see if they found me attractive from far (which is laughable) or if I was imagining this. Well, last year I managed to sneak peeks and it turns out that they were indeed looking at me, as my friend was doing some spying and confirmed. Now, I did not know any of them, we all work in a large company and the only time I saw them was in the afternoon during lunch. I did not have the courage to approach them and ask them their names. I haven't seen them since May of this year and everyday it haunts me that I did not take action. Did they find me attractive? Was there something about me that sparked a rumor and I was the butt of their jokes? I'll never know.

 

Let me ask you something: do you have a big imagination? I ask this because I have a wild imagination, and because I am so alone and starving for female affection, sometimes if a girl looks in my direction and I see this out of the corner of my eye, I immediately draw up the conclusion that she is looking at me, while at the same time knowing that this is not the case. I never look at them to find out either. I do this because I so desperately want to feel attractive to a woman so I speculate. Is this you?

 

Basically what I am saying is to simply ask her. If you are speculating, you are getting nowhere. I speculated three times and missed out, and I am currently speculating with one girl. I don't have the courage to talk to her, but I would encourage that you at least try to find out in some way instead of wondering day after day after day. You'll be wasting your time... like I did.

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Dude, same here. A few weeks ago this girl started looking at me alot. I was walking behind her, she knew I was there, so she turned around, looked at me and smiled. She kept looking at me and smiling for about a week. In one of my classes she sits at the front and I sit behind her, she turned around just to loook at me a few times there too. So I started paying more attention to her. As soon as she realized that I'm paying attention to her, she stopped looking. Now she never looks at me. I thought she liked me, but I guess she didn't.

 

Kyoshiro Ogari, do you seriously not get any attention from females? That must feel horrible. I get alot of attention from girls at my school. But it ain't as good as you might think. Cuz the girl that I currently like, she don't like me at all. She don't even know I exist. I don't know how to get her attention. This has never been a problem before. My friends keep telling me to forget her and move on, but I can't.

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Yeah, just ask her what have you got to lose.

 

There was a girl I thought was interested in me by the way she was looking at me. I felt so alive when this happened, but at the same time I wasn't sure if it was me she was looking at or simply looking in my direction. There was one day when she just kept looking at me, turning around to look at me, so what did this mean...?

 

Nothing. Today I had my answer confirmed. The way she acted around me was simply my imagination. I do not know why she turned to face me a couple of times, but I found out that it wasn't attraction after all (wow, there's a shock. ) I got me subtle clues, maybe she was telling me gently that I am not her type or whatever, but it was absolutely crushing to find out that I was not special in her eyes. But the pain of not knowing was just as difficult. If I hadn't known, I would've speculated for an eternity.

 

So just ask her.

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  • 4 years later...

so this is a question to anyone who can help me..

 

 

do you think it is possible for the girl who stares at me to like me even if she has a boyfriend?? i mean i know she likes him alot but i am beginning to like her and i think i could be setting myself up for something. any helpful advice from anyone would help tremendously

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VERY IMPORTANT RULE: STARING DOESN'T ALWAYS MEAN INTERESTED. I know from experience. I know you probably don't want to hear this (and I hope I'm wrong as I don't know either of you), but she might be freaked out by you. Don't risk it, you don't want her * * * * * ing about you behind your back to every girl in the school.

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Personally, when I'm interested in a guy I will rarely look in his direction. I usually just stare out of my peripherals to see if he's looking at me. I'm very outgoing so if I was actually staring at guys it would probably just because I think he's funny or someone that would be a good friend. When I really like a guy I get shy and basically make it hard for him to tell if i'm interested..probably because I'm afraid of getting shut down.

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I want to put my two cents in about the "rule" that when a girl stares at you; that she could either be interested in you or creeped out by you, because it's true. I was in both situations. In high school, (where I was almost completely anti-social and only had a few friends) a girl who occasionally stared at me in class eventually just came out with it and told me that I was creepy. I didn't care at the time (but eventually it got to me, and I've tried to make simple, minor changes for what their worth). In college, (where I have a lot more friends and am more social) a girl who occasionally stared at me in class eventually struck up a conversation with me one day during art class when she stood next to me and said something funny (related to the art class btw). I just politely laughed at what she said and then I said something in reply about it (tried to be funny, but didn't think it was), and she laughed. Keeping Ter93's "rule" in mind (because I had experienced the bad side of it in high school, and sometimes it's hard to get over even now), I was about to turn back to my friend to talk to him, but she asked me about what I was doing for my art project. Anyways, I still don't think anything of it, even though I wish it meant something special. Moral of my stories: When a girl is staring at you, and you want to know what's the likely meaning behind her stares, it helps to take a good look at yourself - both physically (you might have spinach in your teeth or you might have a funny or weird expression on your face that you didn't know you were doing, because I used to, and I looked like an idiot >

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Personally, I think the girl might be interested. Intrigued might be the better word... maybe not even in a romantic way, it's hard to say. What I do know is that I know how to stall when I want to, and that most girls know how to turn a situation in their favor if that makes sense. It does sound like she was stalling.

 

Hopefully you get the opportunity to talk to her next time. It could be that she just finds you interesting as a friend (although... I know I don't stall for other females), but what's the worst that could happen? You could just casually mention something about the class to her. You'll immediately know whether talking to her or not was a good thing by her body language.

 

My advice is to just not think much about it, don't let it get to you if it doesn't turn out well, but do give it a shot. You have nothing to lose.

 

 

 

Oh, and I wanted to add this as an afterthought. There's a guy in one of my classes and we sit in this circle where we can all see each other. He happens to sit in front of my and I find myself staring at him all the time. It probably makes him uncomfortable, lol. He's not the most attractive guy in the world, but there's just something interesting about him. It's difficult for me to talk to him because I have friends in the class so I don't really have the opportunity. If he did speak to me sometime, I would probably react pretty well.

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You have already learned the answer and it has been reinforced by replies here. There is rarely any way to know whether a woman is really interested until you approach her directly. Don't worry about all the noise and conflicting signals they throw out, decide what you want, approach, and if you don't get the result you want, move on to the next opportunity. The sooner you can adopt this attitude, the sooner you will be able to remove lots of unproductive and needless worrying from your life. The good news is that this gets easier and easier the more you do it.

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  • 1 year later...

A girl stared at me and i thought there is connection between us but now i see i'm wrong... There wasn't anything between us ever. I somehow got in love with her and she knows it... But she acts somehow different.. She won't ditch me and she won't be with me because *she doesn't know me good enough yet*... and now she thinks i'm playa because i talk to some girls and wont talk to me .. help? if there is any help cuz i'm losing patience and fast... i don't have time for that girl anymore.. i love her way too much but i have to face the truth ... WE WON'T BE TOGETHER... she doesn't want us too and it's kinda obvious to me.. am i wrong or not? answer fast please?

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  • 5 months later...

Greetings,

I would just like to say that there is a girl that has done the same to me too. initially, I did not notice her noticing me. one day I just randomly saw her and I spoke.then i occasionally spoke to her. There was not much talk. She was still look at my direction. However there was this annoying thing in my head that just said she was not right for me. She was always around a group of guys. i guess i just did not like that. So i eventually spoke to her less and less. Another guy came along and from my perspective it looked as if she were trying to make me jealous. i did not really care although what she did was obvious. A few weeks later they were dating and i was cool. She was mad at me though and I thought it was kinda funny for a person to go through so much trouble, of letting the person know that you are mad at him/her. She was upset at me for a while. i tried to at least blow this over with her, that did not go well either. I tired to make this well with her, that did not go well either. So now i just dont speak to her at all. i dont see her that much now but if you have tired to make peace with someone and it does not work then the next best thing to do is to leave them alone.

 

Peace

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