If he loves you, why can't he give you what you need?

lostinmargins · 11-03-2009, 11:31 PM

I know that "I can't give you what you need" has become a cliche breakup line, but I believe that sometimes it's genuine.

Why can't a guy give his girlfriend what she needs if he loves her so intensely and if there's warmth between them that radiates and makes them both feel at home with each other?

I just want to know if anyone has any thoughts on this statement. If he loves you enough, wouldn't he just try harder?

Is love really not enough sometimes?

DN · 11-03-2009, 11:38 PM

Depends what it is that she needs.

simply complicated · 11-03-2009, 11:38 PM

I used to believe that love was all that mattered in a relationship, wooow was I wrong. :S

That phrase sounds cliche but it actually isn't, depending on what their girl really wants, some women ask a man to completely change their ways, and (heres another cliche) you simply can't change a man...

So it's not that most guys aren't willing to give her what she wants, it's just that some things can't be givin.

pinkrobot · 11-03-2009, 11:40 PM

It could actually go both ways. There are "needs" that men have that can be a dealbreaker if a woman can't fulfill them.

Needs are different for everyone, and not every "need" can simply be achieved by working harder. Relationship needs are a lot different than physical needs (like food, water, etc.).

IGlareOften · 11-03-2009, 11:42 PM

Sometimes a man can "try" all he wants...but what the woman NEEDS is not something he has to give. It's a perfectly legitimate statement. Can a person give another person water out of an empty well? Not really. The like can be said about emotional needs.

simply complicated · 11-03-2009, 11:46 PM

Actually, the ironic part about that statement "I can't give you what you need" is that almost everyone doesn't have a clue as to what they need, they like to think they do, but that "need" can change tomorrow.

doyathink · 11-03-2009, 11:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DN

Depends what it is that she needs.

Ahahaha DN!

Leighton · 11-04-2009, 12:02 AM

I've heard that one before. Love really isn't enough sometimes... as sad as it is..

jessica911 · 11-04-2009, 12:32 AM

my ex bf also said that as well. he said he can't give me what i need. but what i really need is to have time with him and to be his only girl. is that too much to ask?

d24 · 11-04-2009, 04:00 AM

sometimes needs are selfish and in providing for them he's losing out on something himself. needs shouldn't ever be solely for one person, because if that's the case there's something deeply wrong for the mechanics of your relationship (very base level)

11-03-2009, 11:31 PM	#1
lostinmargins Offline Member Join Date: Sep 2009 Posts: 19	If he loves you, why can't he give you what you need? I know that "I can't give you what you need" has become a cliche breakup line, but I believe that sometimes it's genuine. Why can't a guy give his girlfriend what she needs if he loves her so intensely and if there's warmth between them that radiates and makes them both feel at home with each other? I just want to know if anyone has any thoughts on this statement. If he loves you enough, wouldn't he just try harder? Is love really not enough sometimes?

11-03-2009, 11:38 PM	#2
DN Offline Super Moderator Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: Ontario, Canada Gender: Male Posts: 23,439	Depends what it is that she needs. __________________ Immaturity is not defined by him not doing what you want him to do. Hartman's Law of Prescriptivist Retaliation: "any article or statement about correct grammar, punctuation, or spelling is bound to contain at least one eror".

11-03-2009, 11:40 PM	#4
pinkrobot Offline Platinum Member Join Date: Mar 2009 Location: where the wild things are Gender: Female Age: 24 Posts: 1,718	It could actually go both ways. There are "needs" that men have that can be a dealbreaker if a woman can't fulfill them. Needs are different for everyone, and not every "need" can simply be achieved by working harder. Relationship needs are a lot different than physical needs (like food, water, etc.). __________________ All that we see or seem, is but a dream within a dream. [blog:] http://scribblingsofhope.blogspot.com

11-04-2009, 12:32 AM	#9
jessica911 Offline Member Join Date: Aug 2009 Posts: 105	my ex bf also said that as well. he said he can't give me what i need. but what i really need is to have time with him and to be his only girl. is that too much to ask? __________________ Girls wait on Guys, Guys DON'T wait on Girls

11-04-2009, 04:00 AM	#10
d24 Offline Platinum Member Join Date: May 2007 Location: UK Gender: Male Age: 25 Posts: 1,064	sometimes needs are selfish and in providing for them he's losing out on something himself. needs shouldn't ever be solely for one person, because if that's the case there's something deeply wrong for the mechanics of your relationship (very base level) __________________ "You act as though you haven't seen trees bow to an unborn child before?"

11-03-2009, 11:38 PM	#3
simply complicated Offline Gold Member Join Date: Aug 2003 Gender: None Specified Age: 25 Posts: 951	I used to believe that love was all that mattered in a relationship, wooow was I wrong. :S That phrase sounds cliche but it actually isn't, depending on what their girl really wants, some women ask a man to completely change their ways, and (heres another cliche) you simply can't change a man... So it's not that most guys aren't willing to give her what she wants, it's just that some things can't be givin.

11-03-2009, 11:42 PM	#5
IGlareOften Offline Bronze Member Join Date: Aug 2009 Location: Texas Gender: Female Age: 21 Posts: 246	Sometimes a man can "try" all he wants...but what the woman NEEDS is not something he has to give. It's a perfectly legitimate statement. Can a person give another person water out of an empty well? Not really. The like can be said about emotional needs.

11-03-2009, 11:46 PM	#6
simply complicated Offline Gold Member Join Date: Aug 2003 Gender: None Specified Age: 25 Posts: 951	Actually, the ironic part about that statement "I can't give you what you need" is that almost everyone doesn't have a clue as to what they need, they like to think they do, but that "need" can change tomorrow.

11-04-2009, 12:02 AM	#8
Leighton Offline Member Join Date: Oct 2009 Location: Ontario, Canada Gender: Female Age: 18 Posts: 87	I've heard that one before. Love really isn't enough sometimes... as sad as it is..