Felt a connection with a stranger today...

Comrade · 11-03-2009, 10:20 PM

It's funny how a shared experience can make you feel connected to an almost complete stranger. Before a meeting I was in today started people were chatting amongst themselves. I couldn't help but eavesdrop on two people sitting next to me (now I feel a bit bad about it). A woman was telling her friend that her boyfriend broke up with her last week. She told him that she had to go stay with her parents over the weekend because she was so depressed that she wasn't eating. I felt so bad for the poor girl, and it instantly reminded me of how I was right after my ex dumped me. As she was telling the story, I felt so much empathy for her that I wanted to just reach out and give her a big hug.

I seriously considered walking up to her after the meeting to say something like "I couldn't help but eavesdrop on your conversation. I went through the same thing four months ago. I felt horrible, but with time it gets better." I don't know why I had such a huge desire to help a stranger. I decided to not walk up to her because I bet it would be awkward, and she probably wouldn't like that I had been eavesdropping. Earlier this week she was writing really depressing things on her facebook wall, and my first thought was that she was going through a hard breakup. I was right.

So my fellow ENAers, have you ever experienced something similar? I know that you experience something like this every day when you read this section of the forum, but have you ever come across a complete stranger going through breakup hell in real life and did you want to help them?

IGlareOften · 11-03-2009, 10:32 PM

Honey, though you may think it's weird...walking up to her could have made her day. When we go through pain like that...sometimes it feels like we're alone in it. She would have appreciated it, I'm sure of it. I know God has placed a special gift in each one of our hearts, whether for life or for a moment. Maybe in that moment your gift was compassion for her...empathy. Whatever. Next time, I challenge you to do. What's the worst that could happen? A few awkward moments? OR you could, potentially, help someone heal..just by being so gracious and compassionate. That was a cool story...and I've definitely had that feeling before. Only, I'm brazen enough to walk up and be like...."I'm SO SORRY!" Hugging is kind of odd....mainly because...well...personal space. But the words could have changed something for her.

Comrade · 11-03-2009, 11:16 PM

I think you're right, I should have said something. It sounded like she was taking it pretty hard. I will see her at the next meeting in a few weeks. I might approach her then.

11-03-2009, 10:20 PM	#1
Comrade Offline Member Join Date: Aug 2009 Location: KS Gender: Male Age: 21 Posts: 71	Felt a connection with a stranger today... It's funny how a shared experience can make you feel connected to an almost complete stranger. Before a meeting I was in today started people were chatting amongst themselves. I couldn't help but eavesdrop on two people sitting next to me (now I feel a bit bad about it). A woman was telling her friend that her boyfriend broke up with her last week. She told him that she had to go stay with her parents over the weekend because she was so depressed that she wasn't eating. I felt so bad for the poor girl, and it instantly reminded me of how I was right after my ex dumped me. As she was telling the story, I felt so much empathy for her that I wanted to just reach out and give her a big hug. I seriously considered walking up to her after the meeting to say something like "I couldn't help but eavesdrop on your conversation. I went through the same thing four months ago. I felt horrible, but with time it gets better." I don't know why I had such a huge desire to help a stranger. I decided to not walk up to her because I bet it would be awkward, and she probably wouldn't like that I had been eavesdropping. Earlier this week she was writing really depressing things on her facebook wall, and my first thought was that she was going through a hard breakup. I was right. So my fellow ENAers, have you ever experienced something similar? I know that you experience something like this every day when you read this section of the forum, but have you ever come across a complete stranger going through breakup hell in real life and did you want to help them?

11-03-2009, 10:32 PM	#2
IGlareOften Offline Bronze Member Join Date: Aug 2009 Location: Texas Gender: Female Age: 21 Posts: 246	Honey, though you may think it's weird...walking up to her could have made her day. When we go through pain like that...sometimes it feels like we're alone in it. She would have appreciated it, I'm sure of it. I know God has placed a special gift in each one of our hearts, whether for life or for a moment. Maybe in that moment your gift was compassion for her...empathy. Whatever. Next time, I challenge you to do. What's the worst that could happen? A few awkward moments? OR you could, potentially, help someone heal..just by being so gracious and compassionate. That was a cool story...and I've definitely had that feeling before. Only, I'm brazen enough to walk up and be like...."I'm SO SORRY!" Hugging is kind of odd....mainly because...well...personal space. But the words could have changed something for her.

11-03-2009, 11:16 PM	#3
Comrade Offline Member Join Date: Aug 2009 Location: KS Gender: Male Age: 21 Posts: 71	I think you're right, I should have said something. It sounded like she was taking it pretty hard. I will see her at the next meeting in a few weeks. I might approach her then.