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retired1

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  • Birthday 03/24/1960

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  1. And Die in the West - Paula Mitchell Marks Story of the OK Corral and the major players. History has shown the Earps in a much kinder light than what they deserve.
  2. Oh yes, very dark. And yes, I've moved on from that.
  3. From a darker period in my life a few years ago..... ___________________________________________ At one time, there was a future. A sense of hope and belonging that two people share. In sharing our souls, there was peace, and the knowledge that life was good. At one time, there was happiness. Taking delight in each others strengths and supporting each others weaknesses. There was peace, and the knowledge that life was good. At one time, there was togetherness. Knowing that there was support and understanding. There was peace, and the knowledge that life was good. At one time, there was love. A love that burned like a beacon in the night. Unconditional. Special. Resilient. Tender. There was peace, and the knowledge that life was good. At one time, there was betrayal. And then there was forgiveness. Accompanied by the unconditional love that allows one to forgive. And yet, there was no forgiveness for yourself. Just guilt and self loathing. Now there is no peace. Life is not good. Emptiness, sadness, a deep ache where there once was life. Wandering, wondering, and tears of despair. No sense of direction, the winds gone from my sails. Am I destined to wander aimlessly forever? I dread the night, for it brings the dreams. Dreams that are shattered, broken, tormenting my soul. I awake sobbing, and reach for what's not there. I take no delight in the morning, because that spot is empty. Where there once was a delight in looking forward to the day, there is now nothing. A hollow shell stares back from the mirror. Where I was once complete, I am now nothing. At the day's end, the hollowness remains. A cancer eating away at the core of who I am. Tears. Lots of tears. An anguish that threatens to tear my very existence in two. At one time, there was love. A love that burned like a beacon in the night. Unconditional. Special. Resilient. Tender. That love is still there. If only she would reach out and accept it.
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