PJPaul

I'm glad to see you guys are doing better! NC is the key As for me. I'm on day I don't care lol When I stopped counting the days I knew I was getting better All i know is that the last day I text her it was a Friday in November and I was at work. Last time she text me was Christmas. Mad me mad, but I got over that quick! Stay strong guys!

THANKS!! Like i said it wasn't supposed to be a poem lol i just wanted to get my feelings out. Then after i posted my friends where like great poem! I was like "huh what poem?".........then i read it and was like "AWESOME!!!"

I wrote this about a week ago. I never really have written a poem before and when I wrote this it wasn't intended to be, i was hurt an started typing. I posted it as a blog on myspace and every seems to think its a pretty peom. I say its rough to say the least lol Background threads on my situation: .. She, He and Him: She is unstable She is immature She is thoughtless yet you allowed yourself to fall for tricks. She is more like her mother than she would ever admit. She tells you lies that you believe to be truths and led to believe that love is a beautiful thing. She is in it for the chase and will do anything in her power to get what she wants. She is so insecure that kind words from one man that truly loves her will never be enough to make her feel pretty. Once she knows she has the love of one, she decides she needs more and seeks the love of some uncaring of the trail of broken hearts and pain she leaves behind her. Yet through it all you still love her. You hope that one day she'll change and pray to have her love you again and fail to realize you never did. You search for answers with your brain screaming to your heart that there are none Your heart is screaming to brain to shut the hell up cuz you know how you love and this kinda heartless is unable to be fathomed You look at shoe box filled to brim with pictures and charms and memories and notes that you want to read but cant. You tape it shut, you glue it shut, staple it shut, but some how everyday you find a way to open it. You look at 2 square feet of lies and deceit ask yourself why......... You realize the book you wrote on the pages of love with permanent ink is book on pages oil and ink of water. YET!!....for some reason....you still love her Its wishing you didn't love her wrong? Do you believe her to be evi?l She is of GOD, how can she be But is this heartlessness of GOD? Or is this heartlessness, heartlessness at all? Maybe its confusion? Maybe she can be saved? Or maybe is truly what she is.....Her is She and She is Her The unstable element of what she calls love is not what I call love and even though I am hurt...I stand strong I am I I love I I am He and He loves......loved Her He who aches of what she did knows that GOD has reasons But for this? Shame on He to question HIM!!! HIM who loves He also loves Her, but She has no love for He Do you now see why He.....I am how I am today I who have never known true love is He who HIM loves And the confusion plagues my mind I who is He has to realize that Science will never bring reason to what HIM to what GOD has chosen as his path...as my path My path is hard my path is tough but my path is my path and my path is no one else's but my own. And as of GOD I forgive Her but Lord knows a can never forget. I am He He and made of HIM HIM is strong and so is He He will survive and one day She will know what he as did and she will hurt as he has done I will find that one as he be proud to HIS son As HIS son I proclaim no longer to be weakened by the unrighteousness of others To know if HE is brought to it, HIM can bring He through it. One will one day appreciate my love and we can become one then one can become some BUT UNTIL THAT DAY!! I must love Me

Day 2 even thought she told me she loved me the left for another guy i find myself unable to be mad at her. Even though people say she is unstable and she will never be good relationship material I hope that maybe one day she will be. At this point i dont want her back because i see now that she is unhappy with herself and will never be happy with a man and will continue to jump around spreading false love and breaking men, but i still cant find it in my heart to be mean to her. Maybe im werid, maybe im weak but I feel with NC things will become more clear and the days, weeks and months go on