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Panda2008

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  1. It makes sense that we are no longer a couple because he acts like a child while I act like an adult.
  2. OK I am officially rubbish at NC! Broke it today to email him and ask for the contact details of someone who works at his firm, to chase up a job, and told him I had had a mortgage approved and was looking for a flat. He replied with the person's info, and said he had found a flatshare, which happens to be a short bus ride away from where our shared flat is, and the area where I will be buying. I feel stupid for feeling hopeful again about the future, when the facts speak for themselves: apart from a couple of emails and one text, he has not initiated contact with me since we split up. That means he is moving on.
  3. NC day 4 Bittersweet day today. I have just been approved for a mortgage (oh god I really want to tell him my good news). But it will be a place for one, not two - we would always plan what we were going to buy when we bought somewhere together- we'd even pick out paint colours and argue about house plants! Now I will have to do all that without him, and that makes me sad. On a lighter note, I went to the gym today and I've got my night class tonight so I'm not feeling too lonely so far.
  4. Day 3 Absolutely determined to do at least 14 days this time. He is supposed to be returning a suitcase of mine this week (I am going away at the weekend) but I'm sure he'll forget. So instead of badgering him for it I'm going to buy a new one. By the way, I feel absolutely terrible. We have been BU 6 weeks now and it's harder than week one - because I know he's not coming back now.
  5. Back to day 1 today, although I will have to speak to him on day 14 as he still hasn't moved out of the flat, and he is cat sitting while I am on a trip in a fortnight's time. We had a bit of an email row yesterday, I lost my temper because he's still swanning around rent free at his mum's while I'm having to pay double rent and get the second bedroom ready for a tennant (all his stuff is taking up space). Plus he has moved on much faster than me and I don't think it's fair that I still have to look at all his stuff, reminding myself he's never coming back. He told me he was looking for somewhere to live and when he finds a flat he will move out. But that could be forever! If he's staying at his mum's there's no rush to move out... I need to move on like he has. Sooner the better! Anyway, he said 'I don't know why you're getting so sh*** all of a sudden' and I sent a long email back, basically stating the above and got no reply. I bet he didn't even read it. Back to the drawing board.
  6. Back to day 1 tomorrow as I sent him a text about the cat. ARGH! Why is this so difficult? I only managed 2 days this time (longest 6 - broken by him).
  7. Hi Abbie, things sound tough for you at the moment, but it seems like you are doing all the right things. I'm on the emotional rollercoaster you describe too and just trying to hang on until it stops. You've come to the right place for support anyway. It's easier doing it with others who are feeling the same.
  8. Back to Day 1 NC He contacted me which led to a confrontation about some pictures on facebook. Back to the drawing board!
  9. Day 6 NC I am starting to see more of his good points recently. This is probably not a good thing! All I hope is that he is thinking the same way about me. Really hard to not write on his facebook after our team lost in the football last night. Argggh!
  10. Day 5 NC Feeling a bit better today - have realised I may not have to give up my home and move to a different part of town after all. I did have a bit of a wobble last night though: I had a really interesting day and really wanted to tell him all about it, realised I couldn't and was sad for a while. NC is starting to feel less like a game now, and more of a way of life. Hmmm.
  11. Day 4 NC Lovely pictures posted by him today on facebook of a wedding we were supposed to go to together. :sad: I am finding more time to think about the relationship now there's no contact, or impending meetings. Having a bit of a set back today.
  12. Hi Audrey, yes it sounds like we're coming from the same place, unfortunately. But I think I read somewhere that feeling angry is a good thing, as it means you are moving forward? I hope so anyway.
  13. NC day 3 Don't feel bad about the NC, but I am angry today - angry that I will have to move out of our perfect home (the only place I've felt settled) and into somewhere I don't want to be: in a flat share in my mid-30s, in an area of town I don't want to be. I'm also angry that I have to take these difficult decisions while he swans about not even paying any rent (he's at his mum's) and living it up. I guess feeling angry is better than feeling sad.
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