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sharkgirl

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  1. For the silly things: I am afraid of hypodermic needles and bears. For the serious stuff I'd say my main fear is that I will grow old and regret not doing a whole list of things that I want to do and be too old and frail to do them by the time I realise I have wasted my entire life and been a slave to my depression and emotions. Geesh, that looks even more intense in writing than in thought form. I better get going.
  2. You described a robot. No one is the same everyday all the time, you must be mad. Variety is the spi.ce... you know the quote. But don't you think that that would be one of the dullest people on earth if she were that predictable? The blow up doll response was pretty spot on. She would have the personality of a bag of hammers. I'm slitting my wrists right now just thinking about being with someone like that. It's not life, it's a death sentence. Yuck, get out and meet some really women, you'll see for yourself that we are not from Stepford.
  3. Lennysocal, I think you should read my post again. They are not like a man's ejaculation, we just release more fluid, it's not a one shot deal, it's a constant as long as the excitement is constant. I studied to be a biologist, women do not have an equivalent of a male ejaculation. Men ejaculate from special glands that women DO NOT HAVE! Plain and simple, we are not equipped to have an ejaculation like men do. Sorry, but you're wrong. You may have tasted, smelled something, but that something is simply more lubrication being released because she liked what you were doing. Those websites of women shooting stuff in the air is all BS, it can't physically happen. They put water in them and they have the ability to squeeze the muscles inside to release it in a fountain, but it is not what it claims to be. Nope, just can't happen. End of story.
  4. I agree that it is really important to forgive, but confess that I don't know how. If I feel taken advantage of or hurt, I just can't seem to move past it or let it go. I don't know what to do about it. So I basically end up waiting till that person screws up again so I have more ammo to add to the pile. I don't want to be like this anymore, I just don't know how to correct it.
  5. I never thought I would find another person going through this. I don't know if I am happy about it or distraught to know that there is someone else out there sharing the same problem and yet suffering the same thoughts that I am. My bf likes them too. I don't know what to do, he will always like them, it won't go away. I don't know how to handle it, I am so disturbed by it. He's not gay, but they really do look like men and as far as I am concerned, they have lost all sign of femininity. So why does he like them? I think in his case it is an oedipus complex of sorts. His mother is very strong mentally, I think he has twisted that around to be a physical trait he loves in women because he loved the mentally strong trait of his mother. No, I don't think he lusts after his mother, it's not like that. Is your bf a Momma's boy? Friends in my office are always sending pics around of testosterone enhanced women for a good laugh and it makes me so uncomfortable because I have a guy who gets off on it. He used to go to sites and I found him trying to get me to lift weights. He says he doesn't go to the sites anymore, but I don't know. I feel really duped...why can't I date a normal guy. Then I think 'what is normal?' I don't know, all I can tell you is that you are not alone. It is terribly painful to think about and I have had many a talk, but honestly, it comes down to you. Can you live with it? I don't know if I can, I want to be able to, I love him, but it really hurts...
  6. Hello! LOOKS: I think that I find a wide variety of people attractive, so while looks are important for physical attraction, I don't limit myself to any particular 'type'. However, with that said, I've only dated one guy with blonde hair and I seem to gravitate towards very tall guys with lanky builds for some reason. Overall, I'd say looks are about a 3 on the importance level. PERSONALITY: Vital. I must be able to enjoy talking to someone, but the biggest thing for me, I must have a good laugh with them. I want to have fun with life and I want someone who's going to be able to have fun with me. So I give it a 5. EDUCATION: Pretty important stuff, only because I want to be able to have intelligent conversations with this person. I like people with strong views on things and I think education enhances this. I'd say at least a high school degree or equivalent. I also tend to look for avid readers because I am one as well. I'll give it a 3 because they don't really have to be Einstein. CAREER/JOB: I agree with Swing on this one, it's not really important to me as long as the person is happy with what they are doing. I don't want the type of person who has to throw themselves into their work so much that thier relationships suffer for it. This one gets a 2. OTHER: For this I'd say having similar interests is really important to me. I think it is equally important to have your own thing. But afterall, we are going to be spending our lives together (hopefully) so I want to spend them doing things we love doing together. I give this a 4. Hope this helps.
  7. Assuming I am in a monogamous relationship with someone I know and trust, then no, I don't like condoms. If I am not in one of those then of course whether or not I like them is pointless, they could save my life. But going back, I can't think of anything more unromantic than having to stop the heavy breathing to put a condom on or better still having to end things with the snap of latex. There is one thing I like about them, though...my bf's typically go longer with them on!
  8. Yep, I agree with what's been said. I was in the same boat as you. I was depressed (well still have the disease) and I used to smoke it all the time to self medicate. Eventually, I couldn't really function without it until I became so paranoid and so boring that I knew I had to stop. Stopping brought forward all those problems I had tried to extinguish and I found that counseling was really beneficial. It's been a year since I used any. I feel so much better for it. Good luck.
  9. I am a klutz plain and simple. And from someone who has broken 7 fingers in car doors over the years, I must urge you to go to the doctor. They will take an X-ray and most likely tell you that you have broken the finger. If movement is possible through the whole finger than I am inclined to believe it is not a bad break (probably a chip of bone), but a splint is probably the best thing to restrict the movement and allow proper healing. Heck, one time when I slammed them in a car, my friend started to drive away! Hehe. It hurts like hell doesn't it? You'll feel better, don't worry. Mine were numb for a bit to, but the body is a wonderful thing and the nerves will most likely repair themselves over time.
  10. I was in a LDR for over two yrs (he was in th UK, I was in the US). I moved here to the UK about 8mnths ago now and the rest is history. However, I know what you mean about that feeling of falling out of love. It wasn't that so much as it was an out of sight out of mind thing. Well, no, I thought about him every day. But it's a downer after just seeing them and being able to hug and kiss them. It's a real poor substitute. So after one would head home, there was a real down time until we had healed enough to get excited about seeing each other again. It was terribly hard, but difinitely worth. Saying that, I would never do it again!
  11. Ok, first of all, not to discount the other people's advice, but I trust you and I trust that you know you are gay. This doesn't go away and it's not because you haven't been able to get girls. You know this already most don't and this is a good thing. You can be happy, being gay should have no effect on the things you want out of life. I understand what you are going through. I have been overweight my entire life and can honestly say that it has effected my relationships so much (insecurity) that I have wished I was a lesbian before. The grass is always greener, trust me. Being gay is not a death sentence! It's just a little something that society has yet to fully accept, thankfully it gets better with each generation and science has come along way to proving that these things are not a choice, they are genetics behind it. It is not wrong, you are no less a person. Someday you'll realize this. I agree with the person who said you shouldn't worry about telling your parents yet. Tell them only when you want to tell them. Things will get easier, there will be some hard times, but you have a lot to offer the world and those around you, don't deny yourself or them the chance to see you shine.
  12. Hello, I have strong opinions on this, but I think that one of the reasons for the divorce rates skyrocketing is that people give up. Relationships take work, people are lazy. If there is no abuse in the marraige and there is still love on both parts then everything should be done to try to get the good stuff back. It sounds as if she is preoccupied with work and when that comes into play the relationship gets put on a backburner. I don't think the relationship should ever get put on the backburner. I really think you need to establish with her whether she still loves you. If she still loves you then I suggest you try everything in your power to try and mend things. I wouldn't file for the big D just yet. You seem really honest about it and from what you said so far, it doesn't sound like you want to close the door on this yet, so listen to your gut and don't!
  13. I think deep down you really like this guy, but the whole popularity thing has got you in a bind. If this is true, be strong and go for it because after high school, popularity means nothing like it does now and if you pass him by you may miss out on a really great guy. If you have good friends, they will see what you see in him and not care if his rank isn't up to scratch and if you have friends that would care about such things then you have to wonder why you are friends with them. Don't be shallow with love, like who you like and go for it.
  14. I am my bf's first...well, first everything really. He had crushes on other girls but never went anywhere with them because he was too shy or knew they weren't interested or what ever. My Q is: Do you think it is possible that he can go his whole life only knowing me in this way or can I expect the 7 yr itch at some point? I know it's impossible to tell, really, I just want to know some guy's opinions on this one. Thanks.
  15. Thanks Goincrazy, that's great advice. He definitely said he wanted to move out and knows he can't continue on like and really doesn't want to. This has given me hope. I think it's going to be a slow road. About the marraige and kids, I told him that at the end of this year we'll see where we both are and if he knows it is something he will never be into then he really needs to be upfront and tell me so I can live my life. He agreed that this was a good plan. So that part is sorted. Thanks! KT
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