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GettingBetter

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  • Birthday 12/30/1987

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  1. I have to agree with that. Granted, there are a lot of self-important, apathetic, and sometimes downright ignorant Americans, but there are a lot of good Americans, too. I get sometimes frustrated with my fellow "Americans," but it seems I'm ever only frustrated with the really outspoken and dogmatic Americans, or those who have the negative characteristics I already mentioned. Most are still good. But, I have an Aussie story to tell. My cousin moved to Australia and settled down with a Aussie. Well, things didn't work out, so they divorced (it was a very cordial divorce--they were still friends even after it), and she remarried another Aussie. Well, now her husband and her ex-husband have become drinking buds, built their own bar, and made her the "odd-man-out." So now she's finally divorced her second husband, and has finally left her two drinking ex's, who might I add are quite content as drinking buds, even without her. I just think that's comical... like something you'd see in a movie. I've never been to Australia, but she visits every couple years and brings pictures... pictures of her two ex's drinking while she's out working, etc. lol
  2. That's the thing I've been noticing. I'm attracted to the shyer girls. Unfortunately, shy and uninterested can be mistaken at the beginning. And, for the most part, when someone is uninterested, it's because they're already in a relationship. thereforeeee, most girls who I think are shy are instead in a relationship. But, I would say guys liked to be approached first. Even though I'm shy, I am also old fashioned, so I would generally draw the line at asking the guy out, although I can imagine some situations where the girl might ask him out.
  3. Well, I was shy up until my sophomore year in college, where (ahem... clears throat) my academic prowess began to foster newfound confidence. (The math and physics departments at school are my domain, although my confidence is beginning to seep over into other aspects of my life as well. Alas, it's also beginning to form a bit of arrogance in some areas.) The way I see it, things are often enough reversing now (although not always). I find some of the most outgoing people growing up are now becoming more shy--perhaps "put in place" by the real world; and yet some of the shyer people like me are becoming much more outgoing. At least in my case, my dad has a very strong personality, and with very high expectations. While that made me shy while I was younger, I now feel I was more prepared for the "real world" than most of my outgoing friends (who incidentally had typically more reserved parents). One of my friends started school a year younger than everyone else. For years he was very shy--almost painfully shy--and yet, growing up like that conditioned him to be now one of the most outgoing people I know. The exact opposite applies to my friend who was very outgoing as a child--he had an unrealistic perspective of the world, from which he finally awoke after graduating high school--and now he's rather shy. While personalities still play a role, I think most people go through a shy stage of variable degree sometime in their life, and these factors we're discussing only determine when.
  4. Okay, I realize that this is a very old thread but I think you or anyone else in your shoes should know: I went all the way through high school without a girlfriend. Heck, I'm a junior in college, and I've still not been involved in a relationship. But keep your chin up, and everything will be fine. I remember in high school thinking that I desperately needed a girlfriend. Once I got to college, I began to be more involved in school, and had much less time anyways. A couple of bad experiences, and I decided that no girlfriend was better than a *****. And truthfully, there are many guys going out with very inconsiderate girls just because she's a girl. But now, things are finally coming about, just like everyone always said they would. I finally began to shape up the way I look a little, but mostly I've just been associating with girls who share similar interests. In fact, recently I've been "hanging out" with some of the more beautiful girls at my school. College--or maybe just maturity--seems to have some way of separating the beautiful girls and the "hot" girls, and of course it's the former I'm interested in. Recently, I just went on a pretty romantic date with one of the most attractive girls I've met--and attractive not just because she's gorgeous, but because she's smart, kind and funny, too. For me, at least, girls are beginning to realize that a smart and conservative, albeit shy guy like you or me is really the best bet in the long-run. So what if they've had a significant other and you haven't; the point is, at some point they'll want you and you'll want them. But don't be afraid to ask them out. My friends know me as the "expert on rejection." Sadly, I'm so used to it that I can smell it from a mile away. I used to be more outwardly passionate, and I'm still me, but rejection has built up my strength and emotional stability, and now, come what may I'll ask out any girl I'm interested in. And not only can I better handle it, but in general just being able to handle it well--call it confidence--has made me more successful. PS--Oh, and don't worry. I've been asked if I'm gay, or mocked for having not a girlfriend nor ever had, but they're just jealous because they know, even if only subconsciously, that their glory will be only short lived, but you, my friend, will be successful in the long run. Just remember, life is a learning process. And elements such as dating will improve with time, practice, and a little luck. With that, I wish you the very best of luck, and the humility to see the good in whatever happens!
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