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Kalika

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Kalika last won the day on April 24 2007

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About Kalika

  • Birthday 03/01/1980

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  1. I would definitely agree with this. I always thought that one problem with the idea of chastity is that it was historically OK for the men to have sex outside of the relationship, but it wasn't OK for women. It's a double standard that I think still exists today, to a certain extent.
  2. Are you psychotic or just illiterate?? I seriously am wondering what on earth is wrong with you that it drives you to PM me with angry and ridiculous rants, and then dredge up my old threads to misread and blast them. Honestly, I'm not at all surprised that you have the problems you have in your life. I posted on one of your threads ONCE. And it was respectful, although not what you wanted to hear, and you obviously can't handle that because ever since, you've been harassing me. Yes, you are obviously ridiculously insecure, and that's not the only diagnosis I would give you.
  3. Sydney I have to say truthfully, I just don't understand where you're coming from at all. He's basically spelling it out for you that he doesn't have any respect for rules or boundaries in general. What on earth has he done to make you think he deserves a second chance?? Is he remorseful? No Has he gone into counseling? No.. Has he ended his affairs? Who knows? Probably not, I'd wager. You're putting your life at risk, you could easily contract something that may be curable but could destroy your ability to have children.. or even worse, something that's permanent or even life threatening..
  4. Kanbi, I had a similar experience with my parents, around the age you are now, and I can totally understand where you're coming from. You're in a difficult position, so I'm going to level with you. Given the circumstances of what you have seen, I think you need to tell your mother what you saw. It's possible that your father has deleted the video on the computer, if he suspects you saw it. Either way, your mother's health is the most important thing to consider right now. Your mom needs to be checked out by a doctor before she gets physically hurt by this cheating. She may or may not decide to leave your dad, but if she does, that isn't your fault. You didn't do anything wrong. What your dad did was wrong. I don't think this is one of those situations where you shouldn't say anything, because in this case, your mother's physical health is at risk. However, it might make a difference whom she hears it from. If she has a good, close friend you can tell, it might be better to discuss this with that person. Someone who will keep it confidential, and can be there for her, adult to adult, to discuss it with her. And feel free to PM me if you want.
  5. Dako made some excellent points.
  6. Good - Your logic doesn't make any sense to me, honestly. You have absolutely nothing decent to say about your wife, except that "she has the ability to give me a pretty good tumble when she wants to" ... and you sit there and bash divorce like crazy, yet you've managed to justify infidelity to yourself. If you made vows, you promised to be faithful. So if you're not going to honor your vows of fidelity, than you may as well get divorced too. So according to your post above, you're going to stay for financial reasons, among others. Which isn't entirely wrong, but do you honestly think your kids don't notice that your marriage is as cold as an arctic winter? I've heard many kids say that their parents divorcing is the best thing that ever happened to them, because they no longer had to deal with parents that were always angry, emotionally exhausted, having affairs, etc.
  7. 100% agree.. this isn't her fault. At least this much, you need to own up to. Yes, you do have a responsibility towards your kids, and that involves nurturing them in a safe and healthy environment. Which it doesn't sound like you're doing.. I'm not trying to blame you or anything, but realistically, you can't just sit there and stay, and blame, blame, blame. You have to work at it, if you want it to work. Stop talking to this other woman, and start figuring out how to make it work. Or else, end the relationship. Surely your kids can sense the hostility towards you and your wife. Seriously, what benefits do you think they're getting out of living with both of you in misery?
  8. And you were sticking around just for the sex..???? I mean, correct me if I'm wrong, but she can be miserable all she wants. What YOU do is completely up to you. If you'll be so happy when you're done with her, then seriousy, get started on those divorce papers. After all the bad things you've said about her, I'm surprised you're even bothering to try to work things out with her.
  9. You seem to have so much disdain for her.. But honestly, you're doing everything you just mentioned above. You seem to blame your lousy marriage completely on her. Her depression, lack of sex drive, her blaming you, pushing you into the arms of another woman, her stupid story books and tv shows. Seriously, you need to take a look at what you could have possibly done to deserve this. There are always two sides to the story. I seriously doubt that you asserting yourself properly in the relationship (about your kids) would make her retract from you so much.
  10. I think you should sort of sidestep the question at hand.. and just tell your brother that unless and until he gets professional help, there's no reason to ask her for another chance. If he's in treatment and doing better, only then should he consider asking her for another chance if she's still available.
  11. #1 alone gave me reason to think he's untrustworthy. Then I kept reading, and it just got worse. I think you definitely have reasons to not trust him...
  12. I think you should stop confiding in her. If she asks you why you don't talk to her any more, tell her she really hurt you and you dont trust her any more. Other than that, I'd let it go.. On the grand scheme of things, this isn't the worst thing your mother could have done to you
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