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jilligirl

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About jilligirl

  • Birthday 08/16/1980

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  1. Well, what I want to master in isn't very popular in universities. There is one university within close proximity to where I live that I could go to . . . but the idea of moving to a new city is thrilling. (I live in northern NJ, close to NYC, and this master's program is offered at Northeastern University in Boston- and I'd love to move there.) So it's not really that my boyfriend is preventing me- I did bring it up to him and he said "what could I do, if you decide to do that?" In other words, he wouldn't make an issue out of it. He might not move with me (if I even decide to do this), but it's only about 3.5-4 hours away from my home in Jersey. (So weekends are an option.) This is all under speculation, though. It's not set in my mind that I MUST do this-- it's an idea. And when the time comes (when I finish this first master's), then I'll think about it! Online degrees are NOT an option for me - they're not respected and are looked down upon. But there is a chance that a NORMAL university could offer an online master's degree, but I haven't looked into that.
  2. Tell her. Big deal, you have two more kids from a previous marriage. It's not like you got some girl pregnant out of wedlock and then left her. You were married and your wife divorced you (for whatever reasons). Hey, it happens. This new lady of yours is going to find out sooner or later, and the longer you wait, the greater chance that she'll find out on her own somehow-- and THEN you'll be up the "creek." And plus, she'll be more hurt knowing that you've kept this from her if the time you spent KEEPING this from her is any longer than it already is. Just tell her, she might react better than you think. It's not like YOU did anything wrong. And so what if she tells people? OK so people might be "talking" but it won't last forever- they'll get over it quickly. Relax, man. Things could be worse
  3. Ugh, I hate when people use that word, "the girls." To me, it's more of a word you'd use to refer to your two daughters. Not your breasts! LOL And, by the way, Muff? Taco? CAN WE SAY "GHETTO?" haha
  4. One thing that improves your vocabulary is by simply reading. Read, and look up (in the dictionary) every word that you don't know. Try to use the word in conversations with others. This does seem, though, to be more than a vocabulary issue. It's not difficult to figure out what some words mean because you can get clues from the ways that they are used in sentences. You can see how the word is used in context, and almost figure out for yourself what it means. So what they underlying problem might be is your attention. I have worked children with ADD/ADHD (in a school setting), and many of them were very bright, even intelligent, but their attentional deficits prevented them from soaking up pieces of new information. The question as to how you can get your ADD under control is beyond my knowledge. I wouldn't suggest medication because I usually do not advocate its use (just a personal preference/opinion). Maybe you should see a therapist about this, and he/she could help you tackle this problem? As for learning about things that are worthwile . . . it definitnely makes sense. But there's always going to be those courses that you HAVE to take, those required courses, that are outside of your major. If you're not interested in the subjects at all, then you have to get over that fast. There's nothing you can do about it, you gotta suck it up and deal with those classes that you'd rather not take. Make sure, though, that you major in something that you're not only interested in, but that also has practical applications to a career path. (No offense to all those philosophy majors out there LOL! Kidding
  5. Get a private tutor. Or, if you go to a tutoring center, make sure that the tutoring is a 1:1 teacher-student ratio. I'm a teacher, and I have worked (and currently still do) at a tutoring center in the evenings a few days a week. The best results I've seen from test-prep tutoring happened more frequently with the 1:1 ratio. It's more individualized, more personal. It's more costly than group tutoring, but it's well worth it.
  6. Well, first off, the hymen is not like this thick gelatinous membrane covering the entire vaginal opening! As a kid, I did a lot of self-exploration and never really noticed anything that fits the description of a hymen-- so my guess that the hymen is way up in there and a little bit difficult to see. It can be broken or torn from penetration of any kind (from fingers, sex toys, a penis, and so on). However, I have heard of cases where girls tore their hymens while riding a bike. Don't worry about a bleeding hymen. Seriously. It's not like loads of blood will come gushing out of the girl. It didn't happen like that with me, it was just some light minimal traces of blood (and it didn't even happen from intercourse, it happened from his fingers). But I never discussed the bleeding issue with other girls, so I can't say that ALL girls bleed very little. Maybe some do bleed a lot? I don't know. Vaginal "lips" are OK to suck on. They're not usually particularly over-sensitive, so I wouldn't worry about sucking too hard. Sometimes it's the lightest licks of a tongue that can feel 10x better than sucking on them. Clit stimulation usually feels better than lip stimulation (at least in my opinion, but I'm sure tons of girls will agree with me on this one). What should you NEVER do to a clit? Never bite it unless you get a girl's permission first. Reason being, it could hurt if you bite too hard. And the girl might not want it to be nibbled on in the first place. It would be safe, though, to play around with your tongue and see what areas of her clit she responds to most (look for body tensing, legs opening wider, pelvic motions, moans, and the "oohs" and "aahs." Once you find that spot, stay there for a while, because it feels best when that particular "feel good" area is stimulated consistently. You don't have to necessarily go hard-- like I said, it's sometimes the lightest touches that feel the best. Never heard anyone telling me their nipples got torn, but . . . hey, anything could happen. Some girls might like them being bitten on, some girls might not. It could be painful, and it all depends on whether the girl gets aroused from that pain. Go easy on the nips, I'd say, until you find out for sure whether your girl likes them bitten on or not. I've tried anal before, and didn't particularly like it. My boyfriend is passive about it, too. But it's all individual. Some girls love it, and some don't. But never do to a girl unless you've talked about it with her first. It can be very violating to the girl if you unexpectedly jam that in an unwanted place LOL I hope this helped some. And, for the record, this is all my opinion, and there are always exceptions to what I have said.
  7. Don't overload him with apologies and sweet I-love-yous and I'm-sorries. He's probably starting to like the situation because he's in control now. Just lay off him for a while with all the mushiness. He might be getting a nice ego-boost out of it. Wait for him to come around. That's what I'd do, at least.
  8. Just tell her what YOUR price range is. Tell her what your limit is. If she has a good mind and heart she will understand.
  9. It varies for everyone. My sister dated her husband for 1 year before getting engaged. I've been dating my boyfriend for 5 years now, and I am not even ready to get engaged yet. Thing is, is that you have to be with them long enough to truly know them, and how they really are. Believe it or not, after a couple of years of being with someone, you're STILL finding things out about them (what their habits are, what their attitude is, what they're really like, etc.). As for engagement, people typically stay engaged for 1.5-3 years. But it's not set in stone. Some people stay engaged for a year, and others for 5+ years. All this set aside, though: If I were you, I'd hold off on marriage until you are both done with college and when you both have good, fulltime jobs. Getting married and moving in together is a big financial responsibility, and you need to make sure that you can both support yourselves.
  10. She might be playing hard to get... trying to make you want her more. Then again, it could be that she doesn't want to get involved-- but she can't seem to help it because she likes you. She could be stuck between what her brain is telling her (don't get involved) and what her heart (or horomones?) are telling her (I want this guy). Either way, BACK OFF. You're only making yourself look like a fool. I can't believe you tried to kiss her again, 2 days after she rejected your first kiss! That's it-- if she "doesn't want to get involved," then don't try anything on her. See how she'll start to worry once you stop making attempts to get intimate with her.
  11. Time to either hire a private investigator, or get a friend to stalk her (wow, how low is this? LOL). That's the only way you're going to know whether something's going on. But based on what you've already posted . . . it seems safe enough to say that she's testing to see whether something will "happen" with her and her "friend." If something happens, she'll probably leave you for him. If things don't work out with him, though, she'll probably stay with you. Either way, dump her, you don't need to be jerked around like this. You're being treated like a a-hole. Get yourself out of this relationship before it's too late / more difficult to.
  12. Wait, when you said "he knows where I stand," do you mean that he knows you're not looking for a relationship? Or did you mean that he knows that you're into him? If it was the former, then I'd say don't call him because you'll be sending him mixed signals. If it's the latter, well, I don't know. It's good to show him that you're interested and all. I'd call him, but I'd try not to let it become one-sided where YOU are the one who's always doing the calling because he's too shy to call you.
  13. Wow, you seem to have such an open relationship with your kids! I envy that. My mother never had any of those talks with me-- I found most things out from my older sisters, and from TV (bad, I know). My mother didn't talk to me about a lot of things. She was even the type who caused me to fear telling her about certain things that I'd done. I never got pregnant at a young age, but in my mind back then, it was the worst thing that could possibly happen. I always used to think "If I ever get pregnant, I could never tell my mother--she'd KILL ME!" It obviously affected one of my sisters, who, when she got pregnant in her early twenties, and wasn't married, she got an abortion and never told anyone in my family- not my mother OR my other sisters. Probably mostly out of fear of my mother rejecting her somehow. This same sister also got into another kind of trouble (I won't get into it)-- and of course, she didn't tell my parents. I don't want MY kids to be like this with me, and I'm glad that even though my mom doesn't do well with reacting appropriately, and even though I never felt comfortable telling her about personal things, or things I've messed up on--- at least I have the mindset to be different when I have my own kids. I don't want to be like she was with my sisters and I, and I don't want my kids to EVER be afraid to tell me ANYTHING. Wow, this post got way off-topic. Sorry. The comment your kid made "YOU AND DADDY DID THAT?" had me laughing my butt off, here!
  14. Children do take the lead from their parents, true (but not in all cases, look at me). I live about 15 min. outside of NYC. My mom used to work in the city, dad worked in the city for a couple of decades, one of my sisters (not the one's I mentioned in my first post) works in the city and has tons of gay friends. You'd think that exposure to such diversity (including homoesxuality) would've changed my parents' and other sisters' prudish views! But I guess it's because my parents are traditional - they're much older than me- I'm 26, they're 66 and 62, and they're pretty much set in their old-school ways. I'm a teacher. I used to work with "typically developing" children (I now work with children with autism). I even did daycare while I was an undergrad. And you're right-- kids, especiallly the really young ones, don't attach stereotypes to people who are "different" from them. It's truly beautiful. I can't wait until I have children-- I'm going to help shape them into accepting, respectful human beings.
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