Luke Skywalker

I think that whatever you sow you will reap something, but the way you reap it may not fit into the box of how things are supposed to work. For example, all the people on here who did find love by accident actually did make some effort to find something before even if it was unsuccessful and EVENTUALLY connected with someone. What appears as an accident may just be the result of a delayed result for the work that was done earlier. I have yet to find out a report from someone who didn't do any work or effort suddenly out of nowhere find love. It's just that the work or effort is not directly correlated to the result it's dismissed as an accident or chance. So, I guess it's one of those things that you have to keep your mind open. I think any effort to pursue love, even if unsuccessful, at the very leasts defines in yourself or mind what exactly you are looking for, and then something may come back to you when you are about to quit or give up, or even just after that. I don't understand "love", but I understand "emotionally connections" and as far as that is concerned, I haven't been able to put my finger on that. Some of these connections are just short-lived or for the moment. So far it seems I have been disappointed one way or another.

How could it be worst? That sounds terrible.

I'm a 32 year old virgin and I have never seen a live naked woman other than when I was 8 years old and a neighbourhood girl pulled down her pants to show her vagina and I pulled down my pants as well or touched a girl in a sexual pattern. But I don't have any STD, don't have to pay child-support, never been falsely charged for rape by any basket case, I've never been divorced, I'm not stuck in a relationship that I don't want but cant get out of, and I'm not a slave to my passions to the point it's self-destructive to my own life. Not doing bad so far. Does anyone want to catch an STD at 22 years old? Stats show there is a good chance of catching them, and condoms don't work all the time.

So what's the difference? I mean, to some guys (myself included at times), we just don't feel we are able to elicit lust on other people and feel totally invisible and would feel very good if we got sexual attention. If you wanted to lose your virginity to get rid of it, then why would you say she used you -- you achieved your objective to lose your virginity and you both used each other. I think anyone who wants to get rid of their virginity can get used by another woman unless they catch an STD in the process. It would be grossly unfair to catch a nasty STD from someone you had sex with on the first time. What you could say is that you had a disgusting experience if you didn't enjoy it, and I know it has been said that if you lose your virginity with a prostitute, whether you pay for it or it's free, that some people have described it as 'disgusting'. So, you didn't have a good time with her I take it then? It wasn't worth it at the end? Yeah, but did you really want to have a relationship with a cougar? You were in there for casual stuff, right? Or did you just like her because she deflowered you and you felt that was love because she gave you that experience? Contrast to masturbation, or using a fleshlight, which is worst? But then again, you now have more women who would like to date you now that you are a non-virgin, you are in the 'in crowd' now. Well, in a sense, you've gained a life experience, thereforee, you are at least at a higher level. You are now more interested in finding the right girl, now that you have some sex experience and sex is less of a mystery to you, so you've cleared up some space at least, right? Now, the hot babe that you want to see will probably look higher on you that you've had sex before rather than some virgin that cant get laid. So, why exactly are you complaining?

Yup. Know exactly how you feel and can relate with you 100%. It happened to me about a couple of years ago. Although it's officially against my standards to have pre-maritial sex, I was nevertheless hurt, vengeful and angry when it seemed that a girl I 'sort' of was seeing lost it with some jerk. What makes me angry is that an experienced STD ridden guy who probably would see that girlfriend as just another notch on his bedpost (maybe they even had unprotected sex and she has an STD?), and a conquest to brag about to his buddies in a water-cooler, would be choosen over virgin-you the nice guy -- did something similar occur there? If I may ask, how did you know this girlfriend of yours (at least in your mind) lost her virginity? A girl that knows you have feelings for her wouldn't admit this and you'd usually have to find out some other way, by a reliable third party, an idiot bragging about their conquest deflowering her and adding a notch to her bedpost, or something she wrote or said that would give it away. The only foolproof way of knowing anything would be to see her * * * * * to see if she has a hymen, and then see it later, but other than that it's impossible to know for sure -- if she was telling the truth that she was a virgin, or if it's accurate she lost it (either by your own conjecture, her admission or someone telling you somthing, or someone bragging about their conquest with her). Well, here I'm not totally in agreement. There is a difference of someone losing their virginity, KNOWING that you are a virgin too and interested in her and pursuing her WHILE you know her, and there is another difference of a girl who lost it before she even meet you. The first is a betrayal / offense, while the second somehow is not. . Neither have I. However, I tend to be quite fair and will only acknowledge that this is an isolated or unique incident that cant be generalized to other people. Why whould another girl have to suffer for what some girl did? That would be giving too much power for that girl to allow her to sabatauge your future relationships. You see, the damage is done. You don't trust women like you did before that happened, and unfortunately, nothing can really bring that trust back. In a sense, I wouldn't want to know another virgin girl who wasn't serious about waiting until marriage because I wouldn't want to experience that type of betrayal again. If a girl is open to pre-maritial sex to test out sexual chemistry or comes with some line, then she's open territory and could just lose it with anyone who is able to charm her. In other words, you have to test her convictions and how serious she is to waiting until marriage before having sex. I watched this movie, called Monsoon Wedding, and there was a marriage arranged, and the wife to be, lost her virginity with another guy prior to the marriage, but the husband really loved the wife and it went on. I don't know if I would -- I'd likely cancel the wedding and move on. What occurs in the movies doesn't occur in real life. Holy my ginger-ale. Wow. I asked the girl for her birthday too, and it was one day further than mine on the same month. You do this too. And you don't want to know what's on the other side if you don't know Jesus as your Saviour. You have to settle yourself with God to be right with Him and know you are saved. Anyway, back to the point, I've experienced exactly what you've gone through and even wrote lots of threads about this particular girl. If you like, you are free to do a search, put in "Luke Skywalker" and threads in the advanced search section. Read all my threads in the emotional section about the crush -- and you can read most of the threads I started here in 2006 including the sex and romance section. You'll read a chilling account that I puncturated with dates due to my artistic character. November represents scorpio and the astrological sign represents elements you are describing here. I found out she lost her virginity in September -- the sign of that month was virgo - or virgin -- coinicentally. I went on adultfriendfinder/adult-lavalife to look for a casual hook-up to lose my virginity in November -- and it was a reality-tv quality adventure from this line. I wanted to lose my virginity with someone -- just like you after that happened. I almost did -- but my dad talked sense into me at the last minute and I aborted - otherwise I would have lost my virginity likely on November 29, 2006 or very soon afterwards with a casual hook-up on a pity-sex premise. You see, when I go down, I must do it artistically to maximize the impact. Since then I haven't gone on any adult sites -- but I bought a fleshlight instead around Valentines...but that's another thread. Thanks for sharing your story.

You know it's funny this thread was bumped up not long after I made a post on a dating section about something that I did on November 2006 on a sex personal site and I was quite detailed about it, but this was the girl in question that I was talking about which 'broke my heart' and was the premise of going on that site to get 'sexual healing' from the heart-break. I know the person who bumped this up doesn't know anything about it, and it's just a weird coincidence.

No, in my mind she no longer exists, just like I don't exist in her mind. Heck, I probably didn't exist in her mind when I knew her, I guess I must of came to my senses later that year to reliaze, she just didn't care and I was deluding myself that there was a connection. I haven't written her since November 29, 2006 and have moved on since -- offically -- although the ghost of her memory continues to haunt me until this day.

The person subject matter of this thread has ceased to exist since 2006. Caterina replied to an old thread and bumped it up. It turns out that I had a limerance with this person and it ended badly with us both mutually anihilliating each other in a nuclear war. (metaphorically speaking of course) In the year 2006, dozens of threads were written and many posts were written about her because I never knew where I stood with her, or what I wanted from her (i.e. to convert her to my faith, friendship, relationship, have sex with her) and when I got back from Italy I found out she went with another guy in September 2006 -- she felt I didn't trust her -- and I just lost it. I still think about this girl sometimes, mainly because I've expressed myself to her in a very weird way that is way out of my normal character, but think this is a closed chapter.

I think you've nailed the core and fundamental problem and summed everything up in these two sentences. It's the same problem I feel, and I'm a 31 y/o virgin guy that has this 'little boy' feeling that I cant appeal to women as a sexual masculine - cool and confident type of guy. I live with a controlling mom and with my parents and am sort of a momma's boy. But at some fundamental level - I'm not a sexual masculine man and this is the type of feeling that I can identify with this post, the OP's post and other similar posts on this thread. I use to have same issues in childhood. First of all, I was never accepted as socially popular in school or within the 'in-crowd'. When it came to girls, it seemed that I was always out of it and while boys my age would go after girls in the school yard, I'd just stay by myself or just be rather withdrawn about it. This is the later grades of elementary school. Prior to that I was a bit of an outcast or social loner in the other schools and often bullied and teased. Maybe your childhood experience is not as bad as mine, but I do see some similarities. Interesting point. I would wonder if any other people on here that are past a certain age, without girlfriend experience, who feel that they are not a sexual masculine man who have had bad childhood experiences fall into some sort of pattern.

I've tried lookbetteronline and have gotten no improved results in the online dating venue, leading me to believe, that unless you are a muscular stud or look like a celibrity or something, that any professional photo enhancement does not work. However, they have honoured their partial money back guarantee and thus is something that I would still recommend to people to try. The other e-book product I tried as net2bed-net2wed, however, I didn't seem to connect with the material, and while it seemed to have a good pep up in the beginning, when trying to get to the meat of the matter, I didn't really see anything much there that I could connect to. They also are honouring their money back guarantee so it's a product that I'd recommend people to try to see if it works for them. However, I've tried both these above products and they have not worked for me. I'm quite discouraged from online dating at this time and think I'm going to withdraw from it a bit. I am already seeing someone I meet since December/January, and dont think I need more negativity in my life which seems to come from these sites as it's been nothing but an ego-bust and think I may have better luck staying away from it for now.

link removed With partial refunds on getting pics done, there is no excuse for not having a good pic.

I've decided to purchase the link removed system from Grant, and paid $ 127 US for both e-book and audio books. They have a 60 day money back guarantee, and so far I think the material has potential. That site has also recommended getting a new photo-shoot at link removed which costs $ 150 US, but has a partial money back guarantee if the new photo album doesn't work (they will refund up to $90 US or give a free re-shoot). I'm sparing no expense, I have some funds, a new card and I'm spending some money (risk free with these money back guarantees) with the hopes of improving my game online. I do not have a natural online game or the prelevant advice on this thread has not 'clicked' with me and I sort of got discouraged with the online scene. In fact, my last profile was on December, 2006, and it was a fresh inspiration going with the season of Christmas where I dressed up as Santa Clause and made a witty type of profile that got people's attention and the results seemed good (meet a few people that month). In January, 2007 I removed the last standing internet profile and just gave up on online dating since I suffered from writer's block in writing a new profile and results were quite skimpy and discouraging. (To be honest I also had a gf I picked up online during that time - but also there was a sense of discouragement of the online scene since I wasn't getting that many girls wanting to meet me - and those that did sort of didn't go anywhere in the long-run.) However, I've decided that I'm going to do a major overhaul with my online game and will be virtually thowing $ 300 US at the problem in both photo shoots and mastering the game (which if it doesn't work, I should get back at least $220 US, losing $ 80 US in process). I'll be reporting back here once I've had a chance to really try out the photos and concepts on both these programs to see if it really works since I'd consider myself a sort of poster boy on this given my lack of success online thus far.

Michelle Tumes is a Christian artist I like listening to. She is from Adelaide Australia and I have her whole CD collection. She grew up in Australia, made it big with her music as it started to sell, and eventually moved to America and has a myspace page. Everytime I listen to her music makes me want to visit the rugged countryside of Australia.

I've posted before on this thread of my intent to try Vegemite, an Aussie staple product....this is an update. I finally tried some new bread-spreads this week. I had difficulty finding Vegemite spread so I bought Marmite spread instead (which is simililar to the Assie Vegemite). It had a unique salty intense taste, which had an after-taste sticking to the back of my tongue. I went to an Assie shop today and tried a Cheese-Mite roll, which contains Vegemite inside it, and it had a more diluted version of that taste in it. Went home, ate the Cheese-Mite roll while watching "Land Down Under" from Men at Work on youtube -- excellent -- I feel like I visited an element of Australia. It's in the back of my mind to visit this place - and take a jeep with supplies and just ride off into the Outback, and visit Melborne and Adelaide. Well, large place to explore.