I wonder the same thing. We have been having multi-hour discussions since she told me. Last night was no different. I pressed her on an answer as to when she was going to confess. She swears that she was planning to tell me in the next few weeks anyway. She put in for a transfer at work and this week will be her last with the co-worker. Since the other man's wife found out she has been aggressive towards my wife (cussing at her, yelling, hitting, etc.). My wife said she was scared and wanted to get away from that situation and get her head clear. I don't believe her.
She could have told me no matter how angry the other man's wife was. Don't you think? I have started to enter a dark place that I never thought I would be in. While she was in the shower this morning, I went to get her cell phone out of her pocketbook to review the call log. When I opened her pocketbook I couldn't help but wonder about what might be in there. In a matter of seconds, I had emptied the contents all over the kitchen table and was franticly searching it for something (evidence, verification, I don't know what). She walked up on me. She didn't appear to be mad, just disappoinnted that she has caused me to question everything she does and says.
Should I keep digging? Should I let myself be consumed with this distrust? I know I shouldn't, but when I give into the temptation, I quickly spiral out of control. Somebody please talk me down.