Jump to content

drbombay

Members
  • Posts

    14
  • Joined

drbombay's Achievements

Rookie

Rookie (2/14)

  • First Post
  • Collaborator
  • Conversation Starter
  • Week One Done
  • One Month Later

Recent Badges

1

Reputation

  1. Tears May Fall, Boy do I know what you're going through! I broke up with my 3 month relationship with a nurse at the hospital I work at and it has been tough! I probably don't see her as much as you see your ex (I'm one of the computer guys and I'm all over the place and she is a nurse stationed on one patient wing) but when I do see her it's awkard city.... Don't let it get to you too bad. I've dated 3 women at the hospital I work at and believe me the awkardness does pass over time. I kinda laugh at it now with the last 2 but I know that I will feel the same way in a few months. When you see her just be friendly and nice (as hard as knowing she is seeing someone else at the hospital can be) -- if you show jealousy and anger, she still has power over your emotions and that's never a good thing. There's gotta be another cute nurse lurking around there somewhere for you to date! DrBombay
  2. If it means anything, I just got out of a 3 month relationship (I was the dumper) and it sucks just as much. I find myself second guessing my decision all the time. I know it was for the best but I always ask what if... my advice is to take it one day at a time. Sounds cliche but it does help. Good Luck!
  3. Msnak -- Thanks! I guess this is a learning process. I'm getting better with age!
  4. Hello all, I just broke up ending a relationship that lasted over 3 months. She is 32 (i'm 31), mother of 2 kids and works at the same hospital as I do. I was totally in love, was patient and accomodating with work and her parenting (for the most part -- I can be impatient and it showed from time to time). Within the last month things went from hot to cold. I finally had to end it during one of our "heart to heart" talks. She was pushing me to do it because she didn't have the heart to do it herself (hindsight) and although things are nice between us I'm still at a loss as to what really happened. After almost a month of internal back and forth, I came up with 3 conclusions as to why things went south in my relationship: 1. She was seeing someone else. She has an ex in the picture (kids) and I'm sure once he got wind of our relationship he probably started flexing his influence muscle and broke her confidence in our relationship. 2. She just lost interest in me period. I've had a "I just woke up one day and lost that feeling" situation before and although I never believe it, it does happen and the girl has no idea why. 3. She is telling me the truth. In my case, she realized that she wasn't ready for what a full time relationship required --time and energy. She has a very limited amount of free time as it is and whe we both broke it down, I would only get 5% of her time -- not acceptable to me. She also had problems with integrating me and her kids (troubled childhood). All 3 conclusions pointed to a woman with deep emotional problems that I would not be able to solve. I concluded that my time is more valuable to me and if she wanted a real relationship, she would have sat down with me and tried to work these issues out until we were both satisfied. Since she didn't and I had to "force her to the table" with phone calls and visits to her nurse wing I finally decided that she just didn't want to be involved with me anymore. I know she still cares for me but not in the relationship -- a very hard pill to swallow. It's hard to accept reality but as in my case it was staring me in the face for over a month and I just ignored it. This is more of a rant than anything but hopefully someone will read it and let me know if I'm heading in the right direction when it comes to recovery. Thanks for listening!
  5. Hello all, Long time reader, first time poster! Anyhow -- I just finished having a very interesting conversation with my GF of over 2 months. Background: We met at the dog park, found out that we worked at the same place and then started dating a while after. She is a mom of 2 kids and I'm w/o any children of my own. I'm 31 and she's 32. Dating someone at work is interesting to say the least... she is a nurse and her schedule isn't as flexible as mine so for the first month or so I was ok with the sudden change in lunch times and so forth (all part of the job). Suddenly after about 2 months I started feeling a bit insecure and staretd to express my "disappointment" in her running late, etc. This "dissapoinment" and sometimes "irritation" would spread to other things that we would do and then she would suddenly change plans/break our routine. The straw that broke the camel's back was today when I got irritated when she invited one of her friends that she works with to have lunch with us. I wanted our lunch to be private (even though I never specificially stated as such) and when I walked her back to her workplace I told her that I was irritated and she said something to me in an angry tone and walked off. We talked a little bit later and agreed to talk after work before she picked up the kids. After talking her into actually having the discussion (she wanted to wait until tomorrow because she was having a bad day, angry at me and pms'ing at the same time) she proceeded to tell me that I was starting to suffocate her and she was feeling guilty for breaking our routines every once in a while. In a moment of truth, I told her about my insecurities especially after the 2 month mark. You see sometimes I get a weird feeling (knot in the stomach) when my relationships reach the 2 month mark because most of my relationships never lasted longer than that. What shocked me about the whole convo was that she correctly analyzed that while she was comfortable with out relationship transitioning from the euphoria stage to that plateau/contentment stage I wasn't and that was the source of my anxiety. I drilled it down to the fact that I have a hard time trusting people (especially women in my relationships) Sorry for the length but I didn't have anyone else to talk to as most of my friends are either out of town or busy. I know she is correct in her analysis of things but I need some advice/encouragement as to what the next step for me should be. I'm glad that we had the conversation and it really opened my eyes. I know that she would't have done what she did if she didn't love me but I still fill a bit antsy.... Any help would be appreciated DrBombay
×
×
  • Create New...