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Confusedwon

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  1. There is a saying, that goes something like this? Does anyone know the actual verbiage????? If you set something free and it comes back you know it was meant to be, if it does not come back it was never yours to begin with... The actual verbiage is much nicer than that and Ide really like to know the whole thing... Its making me nuts...
  2. WHY would you want to live your life feeling pathetic while in a relationship. Relationships are supposed to bring out the best in us. WE ARE Supposed to be happy and feel loved and valued.... I KNOW Its hard to NOT feel horrible in the begginning stages of a break up, especially when you are insecure or have issues and you really LOVED that person. BUT I truly believe the ONLY reason he can walk away without hurting is because he never truly loved or valued you. Im sorry...I am going thru the very same thing, I treated my man of 1 yr so great, I was a good gf to him, but he always made me feel like I was not good enough... and then because of all the fighting (which he contributed to because of how crappy he treated me) he got to be the one who broke up with me.... IT HURTS!!!!! But I know IT HURTS because I loved him... He acted like he didnt even recognize my voice when we spoke... he hurts me and I do not want to live my life with someone who is incapable of seeing how Valuable of a woman /person I am..... He Lost something great! AND YOU should be looking at that for you guy also... HE LOST someone who loved him...... Try to let him go... It will get better as time goes on... Lean on friends and family and cry cry cry..... Im finding after I ball my eyes out and gather myself then I feel really good... (-: Keep your head up, better things are waiting for you in life... Eventually you will look back and think, DUH... what a waste of my time and love
  3. What about when the bf asks for NC for 2weeks knowing its a very tough time for the gf. AND She Cant not communicate at all... I mean, Not over the top crazy, but a few txts here and there. WHY is he so mean? no replies, total coldness on phone... Its a break and he is 90% sure he id throwing in the towel. Why isnt he just saying we are broken up??
  4. You should be VERY Proud of yourself, not picking up the phone. I KNOW That must have been Very hard to do! Try and ground yourself. Think of the times she disrespected you and made you feel unappreciated and bad. Try and stay strong. Go to the Gym and try to talk with a friend later to vent out the way you feel. Youu Are on your way. You did leave the msg and you did it to LET GO OF HER. Stay strong, its the best thing and you CANNOT Change the way she will treat you. You can onlyChange ALLOWING her to hurt you!
  5. My ex bf and I also argujed a lot. the relationship klasted 1 yr and he asked for a break just about 2 weeks ago, I left hi alone for 1 week and when I called him he said he wasnt sure what he wanted. And now he wont even reply to txts or speak w/me on phone. I am curious how you broke it off with her and how you guys remain friends enough to still be talking?? Maybe it isnt really over? How long where the other break ups for? Did you talk thru those also?
  6. Young lady... LOL Ok, so now I ask? How do you stop thinking where they are, what they are doing, with who... I want to cry... Im at work and Its been a week w/no contact... He is supposed still be my bf and I have had him in my life for a yr with every day communication and now... nothing... JEEZ...
  7. Why does it seem like it HAS to be a game to work for me... I hate playing games. Why cant he just know how much I love him and miss him??? I WANT TO ANSWER... I look at my phone a lot... wishing he would just txt or call... I hate games and dont understand why a relationship with love Must include games...
  8. I get it... Now all I can do is HOPE he does come back... Thanks
  9. When he asked me for the break for 2 weeks, I asked if we are single during this time and he said No... That if he does meet someone he will say I have a gf but we are taking a break... We had been fighting a lot and he said he needed to take a break to re-charge his batteries that he felt he was getting to the end of his rope and unless he could re-charge there would be nomore "us" So.... We last spoke last Thursday. I txt 1 time fri and 1 time sat but then dropped it... no txting... no calls..... He asked for 2 weeks which will be next Thurs.... So you think I should prep myself for no call? or the call that syas I dont wana get back???
  10. Do you believe this to be the case if the other person merely asks for a break?????
  11. Im glad I stumbled accross this post. I have posted about my bf in several other posts, but hings inour 1 yr relationship have changed. Last Thursday he Told me he was taking a 2 week break... I asked if this meant we were broken up/ single again... he said no, we are just taking a break. I am hurt and confused and really concerned because I am having a very hard time w/it. I t was last Thurs he told me about the break. That he needed to "re-charge" his batteries otherwise he would have none left for me.... I asked why it had to be for 2 weeks and he said he wasnt about to rack his brain over 72 hours re he wanted to do w/us... So that leaves me to wonder if he is even going to come back... I txt him Fri eve to say I Love you... and then I had a very bad day sat and txt asking him to compromise, but he replied he was busy @wk and I didnt hear anything else... I have not contacted him again since so its been just about 3 days w/no contact... I dont know what to do... I hate this feeling of helplessness wonderng if I even still have a relationship... Im also buildingresentment towards him not even caring to compromise... How can you truly love someone and do this.... Also, why does a break mean no contact at all??? Am I supposed to not contact him???
  12. Still, no one has been able to help me understand... Once someone lies and breaks your trust, can they be trusted again...
  13. DN I may just be feeling very sensative but I think you are coming accross very hard on me for trying to explain things honestly. I have been given other reason to feel I cant trust him. I never made any mention of the other #'s in his phone until now because I have tried to maintain the relationship by stopping myself from thinking paranoia is setting in. Unfortunately for me I think its my gut telling me something is wrong. He has done other shady things, things we have argued over. because being exclusive and committed I dont think he should have an open link to every female who chooses to "need" him at any given time! I also dont think its necessary to here my bf calling others girls Ya know what... flirt... flirt all you want, JUST dont do it in front of me. He has done it with females friends that I have introduced him to, he has done it with waitresses or sales women. This thing is just the latest and greatest thing on the list. And I have heard how cute this girl is, Ive heard how beautiful other woman are. I see his face when a woman walks past him in the supermarket and NO I dont say anything, but It makes me feel insecure! As far as the leash comment. I came here to speak freely, have I displayed that attitude with him? PLEASE... no... I have always given him respect, but at the same time I have explained each time something happens he gives me reason not to trust him... , I almost feel like IF I dont ask what he did or wha have you, I wont know... Oh... and to top it all off... I am the one who gets the teasing... I dont get told Im beautiful.... I am saddened because I feel like I should walk away... be alone again... and you know what, I know I have ceratin insecurities within me... But when I met this guy I told him off the bat, I have low self esteem. I wish I loved myself more, I have a prob;em with trust... DO NOT LIE TO ME!!! ok... so............ And to answer the other question. I asked if he communicated any further and he said No. I asked if he heard from her and he said no... so I have to take his word for it... which weighs how much???
  14. My BF lied to me . He lied because he did not want to fight but what he did not realize was how suspicious he was when I walked in the room. I asked him several times Im struggling because I feel if I didnt push asking him what was going on he would have just left it as a lie. Now while he realizes he was wrong and he has done damage to my trusting him, he doesnt understand that I cant just let it go... I dont know what to do, or even how to expect tot start trusting him and what he says... what is the course that should take place? And how does trust come back after a lie? Is is ok for me to put him on a shorter leash (for lack of a better term ) Or should I do nothing ans just suffer thru hoping next time he tells me the truth up front? The other thing that is killing me is that he never replied to her, so now I wonder if she tried contacting him again. And when I ask, he gets kinda annoyed like, jeez, why cant you forget that..... Although he has told me he hasnt heard from her again.... ... Oh, also, he has g's #'s still in his phone... I think he should delete them all... no need for temptation... Am I out of line telling/demanding or asking him to do that... maybe in front of me so Im sure its done... Some one please help me out...Thank You
  15. I know being jealous will do me no good... I just do not know how to stop it... He looks at primarily females, although has looked at males also... He just is so flirtatious, with the sweet name thing... has to ask the waitress her name always, never for guy waiters though... I am starting to realize it is part of who he is, but it doesnt stop me from feeling annoyed at times. I have discused it with him, but he gets annoyed and tells me he answers to no one... lol until the fight is over and then apologizes... .. AND my friends and family think he is a BS artist because he talks and talks but never delivers... so... what do I do???
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