stonecutters93

The last few days I've been wondering if you ever think about me at all, or if you just liked the attention I gave you. You used me to make yourself feel better, knowing how much I truly loved you and you took advantage of that. I'm not sure I ever want to see you again, or hear from you. You hurt me more than you can ever imagine and I can't believe you would do that to your "best friend". Why did you give me so much false hope if you didn't want to be with me? If you had any respect or were a true friend to me you would have let me go on your own accord so I could properly heal. But no, instead you used those loving feelings I had for you to put me in the friend zone and use me as a backup plan. I hope you have to feel the same pain I went through just so you know what it feels like.

First time posting in this thread, not sure how many days it's been but coming up on 4 months of no contact. While I'm doing much better I know deep down I still love her. My story is slightly different though. I never actually dated the girl I loved, it was my female best friend who friend zoned me so hardcore I never had a chance. My love went unrequited, and I made many mistakes along the way. I spilled my guts and told her how I felt, only to be turned down and get the "lets stay friends" answer. So I agreed, and little did I know the next year of my life would be a living hell. She confided in me about all her "guy flings" and kept telling me about the guy that she loved, all the while being fully aware of how I felt about her. But still I stuck around, because she kept telling me she could see us being together one day and even talked about us getting married. There were two occasions I thought we'd end up together for sure, only to have my dreams shattered and replaced by the next 2 week fling. Finally about 4 months ago, I could no longer handle it and told her I can't be a part of her life while I was in love with her and she didn't feel the same. I left the door open for a friendship down the road, but she took it pretty personally and I never expect to hear from her ever again. Still hurts like hell to this day. I was the guy who was always there for her through everything, but I was used, the perennial back-up plan. I hope nobody ever experiences unrequited love, it's a pain beyond anything I have ever felt before. I seriously hope everyone in this forum finds the closure and the time to heal, and find someone who is worthy of your love.

With every passing day we continue to become strangers even more. I'm not sure if it's because you don't want to talk to me or if its because you're too stubborn to reach out and talk everything over. I still have my days where I miss you more than anything, and my days where I despise you. You changed me for the better and for the worse. You opened my eyes to so many things, but in doing so you changed the person who I really was. You made me feel like because it didn't meet your standards that I wasn't good enough. Well I'll tell you what, I am too, damn good enough. I have a great life filled with amazing friends and an even more amazing family. Just because I liked a few things different from you doesn't make me not good enough. I wanted to share my life with you, but all you were concerned about was your next 2 week fling. Good riddance, because everyone (and now myself included) believes I deserved way better than you. Part of will always love you, but part of me wishes we never met. We'll see what happens down the road, and we'll see if god really intended for you to be in my life and if this is one of his paths I had to take for lifes learning experiences.

Dreamt about you again last night, I wish it would stop, all it does is remind me of the cycle I go through of how much I hate you one day and how much I loved you another day. I've come to realize you weren't right for me, you changed me in ways that I didn't like, and now spend every day trying to fix. Why couldn't you just love me for who I was? Instead we're 3 months of no talking, complete strangers and it seems like it's going to stay that way. You were my "best friend". But funny how you can't remember all the stuff I did for you, but remember the one small mistake I made and never forgive me for it. That's why I had to leave, you didn't want a relationship and you made me feel like you didn't even want to be friends anymore. What did I have left to fight for? I wish you well, but a part of me hopes I never see you again, just so I don't have to experience any more pain you brought me after all this time.

I dreamt about you the other night, and it made me miss you like crazy. But I know you don't care, you're probably sitting at home talking to your next "2 week fling" that you'll get bored of. I hope one day you'll realize that you're just being used, where my feelings for you were genuine. I loved you with all my heart, and I know it was real love because of this pain that I have to go through everyday. For over a year I've loved you, and for over a year you haven't cared. I wish it was that simple to just get over you like you did with me, but it's not. I sit here and feel the pain, and I know I don't even cross your mind. And what hurts more is that I know I'll never hear from you again...just shows me how much I really meant to you.

To go from being best friends, the most important people in each others lives, talking all day everyday, and to having so many good times and memories, to not even talking at all for almost 3 months. Did I really mean nothing to you? I don't know how you can't understand why I had to leave. I was so deeply in love with you, and you just wanted the attention and an ego boost. You told me about every guy you had a "fling" with, then when you got bored or "hurt" you came running to me because you knew I'd always be there. That's what someone who cares about you does. But you took advantage of me and hurt me beyond belief. I tried so hard to remain friends and went through 10 agonizing months of it before I finally gave in and couldn't take it anymore. If you respected me at all you would have let me go yourself rather than use me. You were my bestest friend, I'm almost sorry I fell in love with you. I don't regret it at all, as it's taught me so much, but I want you back as my best friend. Whether or not that ever happens I have no idea. It can't while I have feelings for you, but I sit here and wonder if you ever think about me, or if you just don't care that I'm gone. I don't know what to believe or think. Did you really mean everything you said? Was I really that important to you? Or did you just say all of that to make sure I didn't leave you and you could get your ego boost? I guess one day I'll find out, deep down I thought you would have made some attempt at contact, but I was wrong. I'm leaving it in Gods hands now, I guess he'll show me one day if you're going to be my best friend again or not. I still love you and miss you like crazy.

This is my first time posting on this thread so if this is a little long I apologize. My situation is a little different, as I never actually had a relationship with the girl I loved, but she was my best girl friend and my love was unrequited. You were the first person whoever truly made me realize what life was all about. You took the sheltered life I had and taught me so much about how to live it. I had no idea when I first met you that I would fall head over heels in love with you. I was a shy, nervous, quiet and nerdy kid who was content with my life, but you somehow got me to open up to things I'd never dreamed of. How could I not fall in love with you? And I know at one point you had feelings for me as well, I just realized mine too late. I finally had to confess to you how I truly felt, and I thought for sure you felt the same, but you did not. I didn't think it was a big deal, having been rejected so many times before I figured this was just another time and I'd be over it in a few days. How wrong I was. You wanted to stay friends and I thought that was my ticket in. I wanted to show you I could be the guy you always described to me, the one who would sweep you off your feet. Instead my efforts were futile, and you spent the next little while giving me a false hope I had a chance and told me about all your other "guy flings". I wish you knew how much that hurt to hear, and I probably should have ended it there, but I was stuck in limbo, still hoping and dreaming you'd fall for me. For 10 months this went on, I was always there for you when you needed someone, always there to help and to listen, to reassure and to love you for the person you were. I finally started to pull away, and you somehow always pulled me back in. Once again you forced my hand and I had to confess that after almost a year I was still in love with you, only this time you told me you knew the whole time and you responded differently. I thought for sure we'd end up together and I was finally gonna have the girl I wanted more than anything in the world. But once again you told me you weren't ready for a relationship and I "could do better". This time I was angry, you hurt me for the umpteenth time and I finally thought I had enough. I came to your birthday and didn't hang out with you, but it was because I was so hurt by what had happened I couldn't face you and seeing you with other guys. But I realized I still wanted to be friends, and tried to make amends, but you just wouldn't accept my apology or anything I did to make it up to you. After all the heartache you put me through, after everything we went through together, and everything I did for you, you blow up at me over the tiniest little thing I do, completely forgetting about everything else and saying I * * * * ed up the friendship. So here we are, a month after your birthday and we're still talking, but despite what you say everything is not the same. I've finally given up all hope, on a relationship, and worst of all on our friendship. It pained me to do it, but I wanted more and you clearly didn't. I wanted to be friends, but couldn't while I was in love with you. That's why I ended it between us, I couldn't take the heartache and be the guy you always came to while you complained about other guys. I loved you, and part of me always will. Maybe in the future our paths with cross again and we'll see what happens. My life has been a rollercoaster with you in it and out of it. Some days I miss you terribly, other days I can't stand you. 2.5 months of no contact and counting, I doubt we'll ever be the way we were, because I don't want to contact you until I know I'm 100% ready, which will take a very long time. And I know you're too proud and too stubborn to take that step and reconcile everything. So I'll wish you all the best, and I'll still never forget what you did for me. To all those in this thread, I hope you all get over your heartaches, and be able to live, love and enjoy life the way you deserve to. Good luck to you all, and I hope I can be some help and inspiration to people at the best of my abilities.