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the_tiger_striped_cat

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  1. oh yeah . Just jokin I agree completely. Believe it or not HBK, but this pain will hopefully be good for you. Events like this put a mirror in front of you. You should know that a mature man would not say things like "I don't take rides from strangers", or play these constant games over and over again. You two are attached to each other in a bad way, you are in denial, and I bet 2 to 1 that you end up contacting her again. But please, prove me wrong. I think you have a lot of self discovery that you need to engage in. I also bet it doesn't work with this other guy. me too. I figured I'd do it with a bag over my head. That way there's no mess for people to clean up. Agreed.
  2. Oh come on. I know you can do better than that. There are general rules. That's all I'm looking for. I know everyone is different but. Wires or no wires? Round glasses or squareish? Jeans or no Jeans? Is there such thing as Mature shorts? Who cares if everyone has a different face, should I get giant thick black frames? Of course not . All thing equal, what are you're likes. I'm trying to find out what not to get as much as what I should get. I'm just looking for general fashion advice. Even if you know nothing about me, you can still point me to the right direction. These people know nothing about me specsavers.co.uk/cgi-bin/strudwick.sh/s?langid=1&pfmt=1&siteid=22&pname=styletips.html But they can still give me general tips.
  3. 1) I need to get glasses. What styles, frames, brands, etc. do you think looks good on a guy? 2) I'm a graduate student and pretty much anything goes fashion wise (no screened Ts with logos, and less Ts in generals). With my move to glasses I'm looking to put together a more mature wardrobe. I'm thinkin of moving to more collared shirts and button ups. Can shorts every look mature on a man? How about this guy: link removed If he does look mature, what makes it so? How about jeans? I figure if I wear nice button ups with jeans, its just as good as kakais? What do you think? If anyone has any pictures they can find on the web as examples, I would appreciate it. you could look at link removed link removed link removed Sorry the question is so general.
  4. Thank you for tackling such a difficult question. So, all things equal--same person, same psychology, same everything--do you think that the longer someone pines for someone the more they loved that person. Note: I'm talking about everything equal, and don't think I'm talking about myself. I'm dating around. I want to know, that's all. But I don't believe that everything happens for a reason. If you do, maybe you should google for "Nick Berg". But I do see what you are saying. Thanks again.
  5. What if wasn't looking for a relplacement. What if he gave hime self time to heal, let's say for a year he didn't date. Then he tired to look for someone. Take two people that are PERFECT for each other A and B would of had the PERFECT life together. Now say person A met person C first. With this person A has a decent relationship. Say they care enough to stick it thorugh until marriage and then some years after until they divorce. It really sucks that A and B didn't get together because it really would of worked great. But what happens to B? A would of been B soulmate. of course he would never have known this because C had A first. Now say C dumps A so B really does have a chance with A? So how long before B falls in love with A. A week? Ok maybe not. A month? A year? Depending on the timeframe B knows more and more about A is more likely to fall in love, and A gets more and more attached to B and forgets about C more and more. But say there is a minimum timeframe whereby B would go back to C if C asks for B back, because B is still attached to C (rationally or irrationally in love,you pick). Lets say that C just ask for B back right before this threshold value is met. So B has a hard time leaving A but eventually goes back to C. A goes back for any number of reasons from attachment disorders, to actually still loving C. But the point is that A and B never had a chance together. Now how does B act? Of course it will be proportional to how much B is ABLE to love A. If B is the type that doesn't love that much---some people are likke that-- B won't pine for A much at all. But if B does have a lot of love to give, wouldn't B pine for A for a long time. First of all, you have to accept the premise that B could love A to that level. That years later B still misses A and the signature of his love is that B is still going through pain. I want to know if you believe that its possible for B to go to pain for years out of true love, or if it's because he's obessing? Is it at all possible for B to be mature and go through really really bad pain. Or does bad pain just mean that he must be obsessing? And if you don't accept that premise, let me modify it. Let's say that A still has feelings for B, and C. A doesn't even knokw that B knows. So As indecisiveness drags B through hell. Is it possible now for B to through this level of pain, being constantly reminded of As love for B?
  6. You're obession comment intrigues me. So is this at all possible. Lets say that this guy looks for love so dilligantly. He really looks hard. He's mature, his tears for this girl are the same tears you'd see from the husband kneeling beside his wife that is dying of cancer as he clutches her hand. Maybe it's not true love, it may never be that strong. But if after years of trying so hard to move on, trying if he still does cry for her. Is he still obsessing? How does one tell the difference? Now before you get so pessimistic and say to yourself, "She didn't care for this guy one bit, he's obviously obessing, and he's pethetic becasue she doens't care about him." Well everyone needs to understand that we don't live in a perfect world. People make bad choices, end up in bad relationships, get divorced, and sometimes don't realize their true feelings. It could be possible if things worked out differently that they would be together. And let's say for argument sake, that she is unsure about the life with her fiance. Let's say it's the type of relationship where the engagement almost is broken off, or is broken off. Is that what makes the man's tears nobler? I almost want to say yes. But why would how she feels have anything to do with how genuine the love from the guy is. Why are his tears less virtueous the less and less she cares for him. It doesn't seem to make much sense.
  7. Ok this is going to be hard to ask, but I expect it will be interesting. Hypothetically, say I guy gets his heart broken by a girl. He fights for her, he lets her go, and he still loves her after she moves away (lets say she goes back to her ex that she knew longer and was still attached to). Say the girl still thinks about the guy after she leaves him. Not enough to go back to him, but enough to wonder if she's making the right choice. But say this guy cries for her for years. He goes through a pain that only a few on this forum have been through. It doesn't take 6 months to get over her, it takes years. All the while he's still looking for true love. He believes that "the only cure for a woman is another woman." He recognizes the fact that if he found someone he could fall in love with that he might have gotten over this girl faster. But since he didn't he still went through unbelievable pain. When I say he cried for years because of her, I mean this literally. He even writes in his final words to her that he will always love her, even when he's married with children, he will still love her (in a special way of course, loving his wife more). But I have a question. Did he truly love her? Is it possible to love someone like Romeo and Juliet did, rationally? How does he know it wasn't some psychological problem? Maybe it's something from his childhood. Maybe he was just attached to her. People stay in bad relationships for 10+ years because they are attached to the person. So what do you think is the evidence (or signatures) that this person really did love. That the pain was only because of pure, unadulterated love, and not from any other reason--just love. Maybe possibilities are: -he still actively is searching for someone else -he only wants her to be happy -he never hates her (I've seen many people end up hating there exs, maybe this is a good one). -he And maybe as a follow-up question. Say a year later or maybe 2 she comes back to visit the hometown. Say she brings her now fiancé. All three of them meet for the first time. How does this guy act? If he really does love her in the strongest and matures of ways, how does he act around the girl he would die for when she is introducing the man she is going to marry? What if she asks him point blank, "Do you still love me?" How does he respond. How do you expect someone who is unbelievably strong yet has the strongest of mature loves act? Does he hold back the tears or is he naturally happy that she is marrying? Sorry this is so long, but I guess I would appreciate general comments. How do you know you have the strongest of loves and it's not something else?
  8. Im curious about quality. Not quantity. If it's just "the think you do" to say "i love you" before you go to bed every night, then that just isn't as meaningful as some other situations. I'm curious. When do you say it? But I'd say once a day is well above average. Although you're the only respondant so far.
  9. How often did/do you say "I love you" to a SO. At the end of a phone call? Before you go to bed? Let's say that these two count less. But hey, I want to know of often these 3 words are exchanged. Do men say it more often, or women? Discuss... UPDATE: To get the correct responses. I guess this quesiton is directed at someone who is or has been in a long term relationship. If you haven't then please refrain from responding.
  10. Was it ambigous when you started NC. If you begged and pleaded and cryed and wrote poems, then did NC, and then sent her the card, I bet she might miss you. But don't get your hopes up too much. The think about certain women, is that they can still miss you, still care about you, still want to spend time with you, even call you, send you emails, and make it sound like you'll get back together one day, but EVEN THEN, there maybe something holding them back, fear of commitment, something you did to her, issues she has, or in my case attachment to an ex boyfriend. Good luck though.
  11. I agree with a second opinion. If they screwed up the first time.... it's rare for someone your age to have cancer. Some cancer is hereditary though. But you're young, you probably caught it early I've imagined going through what your going through. You're strong than I am for this. You will be in my prayers, but no matter what happens I KNOW everything will be fine.
  12. MetallicAguy - Desired is correct. Doing crunches will help you with a tone stomach, but it won't reduce the fat there--and if you got a lot of fat covering up the muscles, it won't matter how many crunches you do. This is called "spot reduction". Search for it on google. It is widely believed to be a myth, although my mom swears by it. You lose fat all over. You've never seen someone with a skinny tummy and fat legs/arms. Have you? So to lose fat (first obvious loss will in your face, then will probably END with your tummy--but you do gradually lose all over) you need to keep a calorie deficit. I mean excersise and diet, burning more calories than you take in. A pound of fat weights about 3000 calories, so you can probably lose about 2 lbs of fat a week with a -1000 calorie diet (depending on the calories you burn in the day.) xXillusion - even though you're not fat, you'll probably have to do a similar traning routine to someone who is a little fat. You'll probably do more crunchies or stomach workout though and less dieting. But if you want to be tone, you have to lose body fat. Get your body fat percentage checked - many gyms should do it. For women the minimum body fat is like 13 percent. So if your bodyfat is like 22 percent, you actually might need to lose a few pounds, to be tone, even if you don't consider yourself fat. But either way, you'll definitely have to workout your stomach. I'm not sure the best thing for you, you should probably do a variety of excercises. Leg lifts, "building a bridge" with your body (only elbows and toes on the ground for 1 minute, crunchies, crunchies with weights, jackknifes (google "abs jackknifes" without the quotes) and other. Just do an intense ab workout for 10 minutes a day for a month (and do something cardio if you can). If you notice no difference (take pictures), then change it up and try something different. Good luck
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