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kekep

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  1. yep, i've definitely been exactly where you are right now cyp. it hurts a helluva lot. everyone on this thread is right though, you have to give it more time and space in order to start feeling better. unfortunately the length of time it takes to get over a broken heart varies from person to person, so we can't tell you exactly when it will happen for you, only that it will. either you can prolong the hurt by staying in touch, or go cold turkey. personally, i'd recommend the latter. you have to trust in the people on here who know from experience; it really DOES get better. but that is why sticking to NC is so important. stay strong, cyp, you will get through this.
  2. it gets much MUCH better...i'll venture to say, some days i feel better than i did when i was with him!! of course i have my lonesome days as well, but being single is not so bad...just think of all the possibilities out there (and by possibilities, i mean other people )
  3. the best way to show him 'you don't give a rat's a**' is to improve yourself and your life as much as possible, and to let go of your anger over the breakup. feeling angry towards him is just negative energy (albeit, a normal response to a breakup) that could be used productively to make YOU a better person. it's hard to move past it, i know, but it will come naturally with time and space apart and you will start to feel better. trust me on this. try your best not to accept any more phone calls or engage in any other contact with him for that matter. if he is not saying 'i love you and made a huge mistake, please please PLEASE take me back,' then, really, what is the point of being in touch? also, remember, you can live a happy loving life by yourself; in fact, i believe the only way to draw people towards you is by being content and complete on your own. don't look to a man for fulfillment like this.
  4. I think these words are spoken to ease the guilt of the dumper.
  5. It is frightening to me how similar our situation is. My ex and I share a phsyical attraction combined with an emotional connection. There is definite love there, but not the way that it used to be. I think we've lost that forever, and what is left has been tainted by years of hurting each other. We have done the back and forth, on and off thing as well. I know exactly how you feel. Frustrated. What I will tell you is in a real relationship, where it's 50/50 and both people are fully invested, there is no need to contain your feelings or hide your emtions. You say you have all these questions you want to ask her, and yet you admit you're afraid by asking her you will push her away. This is not a relationship. Take a step back from what's going on here and try to look at it objectively. Yes, you two are attracted to each other...you will always feel a connection to someone you have a history with. Yet, it's been shown time and again that the relationship doesn't work. For whatever reason. Trust me on this, I'm speaking from experiencing this type of situation firsthand, you need to pull back from her for awhile. It hurts and it sucks, but that's how breakups work.
  6. What do you think his likely response will be if you tell him your feelings?
  7. If I were you, I'd leave it alone right now...don't pursue anything further with her for the time being. She might feel pressured from you if you start contacting her all the time and she isn't ready for it. You said you had a lunch date with her and it was a bit awkward?? Maybe allow for things to settle for awhile and for her (and you) to reflect on the possibility of a future relationship. Continue working on self-improvement and building your confidence up; if she displays a continued interest in you, allow things to develop naturally. Don't try to force it. Once you start planning and trying to manipulate the situation, it is sure to backfire on you.
  8. how long did you two date? how long since the breakup?
  9. I'm glad I'm not the only one like this. Saddest breakup song ever = "Lonely Day" by Ben Harper Good stuff though.
  10. Hey there, I think it's great that you've come so far since your breakup, in terms of becoming a happier person and leading a more fulfiling life. So it's been about a year since you parted ways? I haven't seen your other threads, so how long did you two date? I think the fact that you wrote you wanted him to know how much you've changed says a lot. It means you haven't put this relationship fully behind you. You need to take the necessary steps towards closure by not attempting to talk to him anymore, and putting him out of your life for good. It's not healthy to hang on like this. Believe me, I know it's hard to cut someone out of your life that you love, but it seems like he can only hurt you at this point, especially now that he's shown you he has moved on with somebody new. Do you really want all of this unnecessary drama in your life? Big hug to you, I know you are feeling sh*tty right now, but try and open yourself up to the idea of being single and have fun with other people. Make yourself get out of the house on V-Day; that's my plan!
  11. Hey Masu, I know you're going through a rough time w/this breakup, but I hope you recognize that you are SO young right now and will have many wonderful relationships ahead of you. You'll look back on this one and wonder how she ever got under your skin. I want to tell you something. I thought I was IN LOVE with this guy I dated in high school; it took me about 6 months to get over it, and we only dated for 3 months!! In the scheme of things, 3 months is not that long, but at the time, I was practically dying over this guy. Fast forward 6 years later....I saw my high school ex out the other night, and I can tell you I feel nothing for him except for having friendly feelings towards him. I'm telling you this b/c you should know there are going to be TONS of girls in your life, and this girl is just one of many; the one you are hung up on right now sounds extremely immature and foolish anyway. You're at a time in your life when you should have fun and not get tied down to any one person.
  12. the other night, my sister called me into her room b/c she was upset. she said a few weeks ago while she was out w/work buddies at a bar, that my dad came in with 3 women my sister had never seen before. he told my sister he had met the ladies at a restaurant in the area while he was out with some colleagues (well, they're basically his drinking buddies), and that they had just walked down there for a drink after eating. my sister said he introduced her to the women, and it was very awkward. he also asked her not to tell my mom about seeing him out. well, the night she called me into her room, she said earlier that one of the women had been calling my dad's cellphone. she said that she asked my dad why she was calling, and my dad said he didn't know, then took the cellphone into my parents' room to call her back. she couldn't hear their conversation. also, my dad was intoxicated that night. my sister is really upset about this, and so am i. i want to tell my mom b/c if my dad is fooling around on her, she has a right to know. she is a very strong lady, but this would devastate her as she loves my dad to death. but what if this lady and my dad are just friends? i don't know want to blow it out of proportion if it isn't anything to get upset over. the other thing is, my dad and i aren't the closest, so approaching him about it would be really weird for me. what do you think i should do?
  13. I would recommend it, especially if you have been feeling depressed lately. Talking to a counselor could shed some light on your situation.
  14. How long did you 2 go out for? Getting over somebody usually takes a little longer than two weeks, but if that's the case then, hey, more power to ya!
  15. I personally think that going out to have drinks with friends once or twice a week is fine, but drinking as much as you are is just avoiding dealing with your feelings. Trying to numb the pain with alcohol will lead you to a deadend street. You need to find a healthier outlet than this. I like doghead's suggestion to exercise; it really does help alleviate stress and leaves you feeling better about yourself. Personally, when I'm feeling really down, I listen to music or go to the bookstore and read, or plan a dinner date with friends.
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