wikcrs

Hi again guys. Been about a week since the last time, and things have changed somewhat. On friday me and acouple of good friends decided to spend the weekend in Denmark, visiting a friend and getting wasted. Whoever says alcohol doesn't help, doesn't know what they're talking about. Going to Denmark by ship, me and one of my friends hit the bar. Allready after a few beers I noticed a really cute girl giving me some attention. And by the time we hit shore, we had talked, danced and really hit it off. It turned out she was from my neighbouring city, and so we exchanged phone numbers before we parted our separate ways. By SMS later that night, she even thanked me for making this the best start on a vacation she had ever had. I haven't bothered to send her any more sms' after that though, as she and her friends were going away for an entire week. But this caught me in sort of a dilemma. I really enjoyed the attention I got from her, and so I'd love to see her again. But I'm not confident I should, as I feel it would probably hurt my ex that I was allready moving on. On the other hand, she did break up with me, and not the other way around. Not really sure I should try dating yet either, it's only been abit longer than a week since the initial break up, and I'm probably far from moving on, in terms of emotions etc. But I really feel much better about being me, and being single again, than what I did last week. Allthough I'm still sort of on an emotional rollercoaster at the moment, one day feeling great, and another feeling down. basically I just felt like I needed to say thank you for all your help while I was really torn up last week, and to let you know I feel alot better allready. Which amazes me, as I was sure I'd be devastated for months. I'd really appreciate responses on what to do, or not do, with this other girl, as I'll probably sms her again this weekend or the following week. If for nothing more, it really helps to know my ex isnt the end all, be all of my sosial life.

I was watching the soccer semi finals last night with my best friend, when she suddenly called me up, asking me to go for a walk with her. I agreed, and drove over. She said she just had to see me, or as she puts it, she needed her daily dose of me before going to bed. It struck me as abit egoistic at first, she dumped me, but she had to see me. I quickly realised I had accepted that we stayed in touch for now, and that it was sort of my own fault for agreeing to meet her. Anyways, by the end of it all we were both in good spirits, with abit more answers. We talked about keeping in touch or not, and I said I didn't know what to do. She really wanted to keep me as a friend, saying I shouldn't be afraid that she would go out with anyone for a long time. I want to believe that she won't, but I know its inevitable, when she gets back out with her friends, she's gonna want some fun in her life, fun I can no longer give her. But god, it feels so good to be around her, it's like a drug that instantly makes you feel so much better about being you. It's like an addiction. She told me I should write everything that comes to mind down, since I'm much better with the written than the spoken word. Then when I feel like I have written down enough, I could choose to have her read it, or not. She honestly wants to help me through this, knowing the only resolve I can imagine is her taking me back again. I'm off to my first day at work since this happened, I'm gonna hate it, I allways analyse and grind on thoughts when at work. God I hope I can one day logg back onto these boards and smile at how this all worked out. Ahh well, I just had to logg on here to share my thoughts about last night, don't know if it was such a good idea, but it felt good at the time. I don't feel to bad at the moment either, thanks for your replies, it really helps to know what I have to do to get past this, but for now, I'll be taking it one day, one step, at the time.

Hello everyone. I havent been on here for 2 years, and now is the time to come back. I find enormous support in reading through your experiences, for that I say thank you. Alittle about me; The November of 2004 I met a girl, we fell in love, life was good. Finishing school the following spring, I spent the most wonderful summer with her before being called in to the military for one year (in norway this is mandatory). This year is coming to a close, as did our relationship yesterday... PS. This is my first real relationship ever, I'm 20 years old this september. My particular service required me to be away 1 week, and home the next, it was probably the best thing I could ever have hoped for. I was thrilled to be able to see my girlfiend that much during this year. This monday morning, on my 15 minute train ride back home, I was overjoyous. The sun was shining, temperature was good, and I was looking forward to holding my precious girl again. Half an hour later I pulled up outside her parents house, jumped out of my car, ran around back to the porch and went inside. Finally walking through her bedroom door, I instantly knew something was wrong. Thats about 34 hours ago... We cried together, she repeatedly told me how wonderful I am, that she loves me, but that there is something missing, and she has felt like this for a while. Shortly after the inital shock, we were both talking normally about the why's, what's and how's, I don't think it really struck me until late last night, as I went to bed alone. I think it's also worth noting that we for some reason had sex a short while after she had told me we were done. We talked about how we wanted things to be in the future, this all being sort of surreal I proposed to talk things over the next day (today), when things had fallen in to place. When I left her house some 4 hours later, I spent the rest of the night with some friends. When the last of my friends left my place late last night, I burst into tears as I was picking her fotos, letters and mostly everything I had gotten from her, off of the walls etc. This was the most horrible night I have ever gone through. I deleted every message and every picture I ever sendt or received, rewrote my Msn profile and tried to get rid of everything that reminded me of her. I quickly realized that just about everything I could think off reminded me of her. I even began crying thinking how I would never bring her her special slice of bread and water in the morning, as I laid down in the bed. First thing I did as I woke up at 9 am this morning, was jump out of bed, get dressed and drive over to her place. The second I saw her face, it was as everything was allright again, like this whole thing never even happened, I followed her down to her room. We talked for a while, we were both very sad. But just being around her made me feel great (we both smiled and laughed together), we agreed that we both wanted to keep in touch, but we weren't sure how or when to start seeing eachother again. She also said that if I ever needed to, I could allways come over to talk or just to see her again. The thing thats freaking me out is, when I'm with her, I have a totally different mindset than after being alone, just thinking. I even remember her saying that she was probably gonna miss me so much, she would come crying for me to take her back. All of this is giving me a sort of false hope, like none of this is for real. Anyways, sorry for being so long, I'm just so incredibly confused right now. Everyone keeps saying it's best to do NC, but I just don't think I am strong enough to never pick up the phone or go see her again. I'm barely strong enough to sit still without crying. Thinking about how great it makes me feel to sit down next to her, hold her, and talk about this with her, how could it hurt to keep in touch when this person isn't just the love of your life, but also your best friend? I would think you need to talk things through before you stop seeing someone, or am I wrong? I don't know, all I know is that I miss her. I want to txt her, telling her I need to see her tonight. Tell me, is there any hope of being able to keep in touch, or should I just cut off all contact?

Staciemacie: Like Caldus pointed out, both of you seem to wait for the other to make the first move. I'd suggest you just act friendly, ie. smile when you catch his eye, walk up to him and say Hi or whatever. You should be able to find out more about how he feels from his initial reaction. Good luck, and remember it's better to find out for sure, than to never find out.

I can totally relate to the original post here. I had a weird sort of relation towards a girl for a good while. In short it was the regular school-attraction. I grew to like her more and more, and we became closer nearing summer. She went away for the holidays (a full month), and when she got back she had changed her mind. Even though we hadnt even dated before she left, I knew I started feeling stronger about her, and the whole time she was away I thought about her, which only made me feel stronger for her. Then to have her come back and "end" what we had / I thought we had, really broke me apart. Background; link removed . Anyways, this ended like 4 weeks ago at her birthday party, which is explained in the link. Ever since I've felt just like you. When I finally got a real grip of myself, I iniciated sort of a NC which worked wonders, for a while. Only problem was we are in the same class, and me seeing her every day doesn't help. So after about a week of no talking to her, she contacted me, and we agreed to try and keep it casual, since what happened really wasn't that big of a deal. I then found myself thinking of us, how I could get her to change her mind, how it would work out, how I could become closer to her etc. Only problem with thinking up all the bad sides of this girl, is that I honestly can't bring myself to do it. Any ideas on how to really get over a girl, and move on?

He does have a good right to question it though. If this was my girlfriend going for walks with this guy, and getting those messages, I'd focus on taking my relationship a step further, talk to her about this guy first and foremost. And the fact that this guy only hangs out with this girl when they're alone indicates quite clearly he has some hidden motives. I wouldnt even bother talking to this guy about it, he would just denie it, I'd do just like ImAGuy said; ofcourse after you've sorted things out with your girl. Violence do solve some problems, and thats a fact. You could allways just threaten him, if you don't want it to get messy. [edit] And become friendlier to some other girl-friends you have, or get some. To use as backups, just incase.[/edit] Best of luck to you.

It's abit hard to actually know what you want help with here... You've written 4 of the last 4, and only 4, posts without asking for anything. I'm opposed to the whole idea of these extremist christian ideals, such as no premarital sex, no dating etc. So in my own case I'd just show the girl some intrest and try to take it from there. The last thing I would do is to worry about this "big fat involved" guy though, or what your friends think. Thats my advice, not that I'm sure if you even wanted any. Best of luck...

I dunno 'bout ur location, but at local grocery stores where i live (and infact work), it tends to quiet down during the evening. Maybe try to approach her when there arent that many costumers around. Anyways I'd just try to talk to her, nm if theres a queue.

smoke & drink... I've been drinking every weekend this springbreak, and smoking inbetween. Does that label me as bad news? I wouldn't think so, don't base your actions off things like that. I'm not saying, don't listen to your parents, but your/his age would determin wether or not I think you should or should not do what they say.

Thx alot for your advice. It sounds very dramatic to steer clear completely. I mean, were in the same class and everything, just avoiding/ignoring her would be quite childish, and its not like this girl is or ever was the love of my life. Ive spent these last two months probably even more confused than she was, so.. But just after today (just got back from school), I feel better, and we're able to talk fine and everything. Just acting casually, it's not like what happened was a huge deal anyways. more responses, also to my desicion to write the letter is appreciated. Thx.

This will probably be huge, so bare with me, I'll do the best I can making paragraphs etc. After being somewhat "in love" with a girl, or atleast believing I have been, throughout the summerholidays, we finally got together and things went wrong. Her birthday was 14th of August, just last weekend, and I decided to come at the last minute. She was very glad I did. As an outcome of this evening we kissed, and talked, we were both very drunk, and it has all ended miserably. From quite early on that evening, I sensed she "liked" me too, cuddeling etc. which was quite a jump. Like I said we were both quite drunk that evening, for no apparent reason she ended up making out with another guy, ill call him Nico. This not only confused and upset me, it totally threw me off balance. I sendt her a stressed sms while she was infact in a room with Nico (they werent XXX or anything). Next thing I knew was a friend of mine sitting out on the porch talking to her, her crying, and I heard my name was mentioned. Horrible as it may sound, that made me feel good. This all ended with us two talking "alone" in a dark room, kissing, and her telling me she loved me "too". She kept saying she didnt know what she had done, nor what shes doing, and thats she's sorry. She cried abit later, as I left to finish off the evening at a club. (It sounds really ugly, but it was the only thing I could do, and she agrees.) Last night we talked it over, and she said she had never thought of me as more than a friend to her, which I cant say I agree with, but thats for later. Thats what happened up until last night, when I decided I had to express how my last months had been, how I acted, and get some crucial questions answered, through a letter. (e-mail) The Letter: (Translated from native language; (norwegian, so plz excuse errors) Just afew hours ago we talked about it, and she thought it was incredibly sweet, and was absolutely speechless. I'd like to precisise that i didnt write this to "change" her opinion in any way, just to make things easier on her, shes going through a probably more challenging time than myself. Just before i decided to write this here on this forum, i heard she had shared it with two of our friends, and one of them told me he had no idea why this girl and I wasnt anything more than friends. The letter had infact totally melted the second friend, and they said only positive things. But i wonder if i did a good thing, or if it was too much. Maybe i should have just let it go.

I dont think this belong in the Relationships forum... Though U could have some sort of relationship with ur "rod" i guess... Anyways, yes its normal, and anything above 4-5cm should be the right thickness...

For my own case, I hate those "games". It hurts to be the one to "allways" make the first move. And it would hurt more, for it to end like that, even though it would be inevitable...

This was like one and a half months ago (day before my final maths exam). I had worked on a problem for like 2 hours before I went to bed, without any progress (Integration of logaritms etc.), where I just went over and over it in my head. When I woke up the next morning, the first thing I thought about was the solution of the problem. I got it right the first time over, and it was absolutely clear to me how to do it.

I havent heard anything about any Accutane before, but do u have to "continue" using it, or just use it until it disappears, then your fine?