HippieBee

I'm not sure if this was the best thing to do, but I told him about the problem I've developed. I don't want to feel like some kind of stalker, I just want to be honest with him. As for his reaction... he began apologising. Blamed himself for not trying hard enough. Asked me not to leave him. It's not his fault... it's not all mine either... just some lack of willpower on my part perhaps. Unlike me, he doesn't realise that it's no good for me to be completely emotionally dependent on him... Guess I've got a new problem now, hey?

That's what I try to do... I try to keep myself distracted by seeing my friends as often as possible. Although I can still be a little anxious, I'm still able to have fun around them. It's when I come home or am by myself that it becomes a problem. I have so much work to do... and I know I'm capable of doing it well, but I can't seem to be able to focus long enough to get the job done. I know I need to stop being a nervous wreck, but it's so much easier said than done. When I do get to see him (rare) or am speaking with him everything is fine.. wonderful.. perfect. But some times I just can't help but feel that he isn't trying hard enough. I trust him 100%. I've never had a reason to doubt him. When I say I go nuts when he tells me of the latest female friend he's made, it's because I wish he were diverting that attention towards me. Because we're apart, we both like to make sure that we both still know where we stand with one another. My problem is that I want to check this multiple times a day. As for 'unanswered questions'... I'm not so sure about that. All I can do is blame it on the distance and the consequential loneliness.

I hate admitting this, but I've become obsessed with my b/f. I do and don't know why this has happened... he moved inter-state and although we do our best to be regularly in touch, it never seems to be enough for me. I am constantly checking my phone and e-mail... looking for any sign that he's been around. He makes a new female friend and I go insane. I can't do my uni work... I can't focus on the job... I know this is really unhealthy... what can be done to remedy this?

Argh! I'm friends (not very close any more!) with a guy that behaves the same way... I'm not even brave enough to give you an example of the type of things he has said to me. He's generally a pretty cool guy but he continued to make me feel really uncomfortable when I was around him. I was pretty firm in letting him know that he was acting inappropriately but this didn't seem to phase him. We're both seeing someone else and it got to the point that I started to feel guilty/felt like I was hiding something from my boyfriend and so I had to back off of our friendship. Verdict? No regrets. Sometimes I miss how close we were, but I need to be shown respect and treated with common decency. You have to decide for yourself when enough is enough. Boyfriends are definitely different, but it still depends how comfortable you are with his comments. I'd say that flirting/being cheeky with your partner is normal... ...And fun!

If one of you DOES retain a mobile phone, the other can send text messages via the internet. MSN... ICQ... I'm sure there are other ways too. An instant 'I love you'... 'Get your butt on the internet so we can talk!' would be a great way to negotiate the time diffs. As for phone calls... International phone cards can be considerably cheaper. I'm in Aus. and I can call my friend in America @ 3 cents a minute. There's also a small connection fee (40 cents or something)... not going to break the bank. Patience and good luck!

You'd sooner doubt yourself than doubt them... You can see beauty where it once never existed... The whole purpose of your existence seems to be to devote yourself to this person... You live to make them smile... Mmm...

You're all right when you assume that we're pretty comfortable with one another and we do communicate really well... I just wanted to be as aware of /educated about what to expect so there weren't any surprises. Maybe I think too much! After posting, I searched around the forum and found lots of feedback to other people's inquiries which is relevant to me... ah, the joys of the internet! Anyway, I'm rather looking forward to it now! Thanks for your imput!

Hiya. My boyfriend of a year and a half and I are planning on having sex together for the first time next weekend. I am a virgin (19) and he severely is not (21)! I know I'm ready but I'm still a bit nervous.... that's allowed, right? Although I have a rough idea of what to expect (not fireworks!) I could use a little imput.... advice on how to relax.... am I going to be limping for a week??? I just don't want to be confronted with something that will freak me out... Thanks.