ParisPaulette

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hzNRl6emK90&list=RDyZIummTz9mM&index=14

I'm glad to leave 2017 behind. Ironic a favorite band would lose one of its own, a favorite singer of mine and his songs would be the ones I play when I think about my mother. RIP, may you both find peace and happiness wherever you are.

For my mother. [video=youtube;v-Dur3uXXCQ] ]

Sigh, The Dark Tower. I know a book series isn't going to be the same in a movie, but I had hope. I mean the Harry Potter and Lord of the Rings films were pretty decent on their own. Plus Idris Elba is yummy, so although I'd read the books and loved them, I decided to give the film a chance. I should have gone with my original impulse of just waiting until it hit Netflix. The film on its own, pretending I knew nothing about the original story, was just awful. I'm just hoping It will be better.

[video=youtube;xNDNDYGA7P4] ] A girl after my own heart.

No matter how well my mom is doing after starting/stopping a new treatment/trying new activities/insert other thing to try and make her last days better, there will come that day, that moment when I'm reminded that she has Alzheimer's and is not coming back. I just wish it didn't hurt so much whenever it happens. Death by a thousand tiny paper cuts is what this illness is.

[video=youtube;GzT4p-OaJ5c] ]

[video=youtube;DDcJiamY9N8] ] My new favorite song!

^^^ The Scientist is a favorite of mine too. Another one I like to play sometimes when I'm thinking of my father, who was an alcoholic that finally got clean and sober and kept it that way for 30 some years. I hear this song and imagine he would have liked it and said that the song is about an addiction to alcohol, not a love gone wrong. So that's how I hear it. Plus something he once said to me about his addiction as a constant reminder to him of what he was, a weak man. I told him a weak man would have died, he didn't. I hope it gave him some comfort to hear that. RIP Dad. Nickelback: How You Remind Me Never made it as a wise man I couldn't cut it as A poor man stealing Tired of living like a blind man I'm sick of sight without A sense of feeling And this is how you remind me This is how you remind me Of what I really am This is how you remind me Of what I really am It's not like you to say sorry I was waiting on a different story This time I'm mistaken For handing you A heart worth breaking And I've been wrong I've been down Into the bottom of every bottle These five words in my head Scream Are we having fun yet Yet, yet, yet, no no Yet, yet, yet, no no It's not like you didn't know that I said I love you and I swear I still do And it must have been so bad 'Cause living with me must have Damn near killed you And this is how you remind me Of what I really am This is how you remind me Of what I really am It's not like you to say sorry I was waiting on a different story This time I'm mistaken For handing you A heart worth breaking And I've been wrong I've been down Into the bottom of every bottle These five words in my head Scream Are we having fun yet Yet, yet, yet, no no Yet, yet, yet, no no Yet, yet, yet, no no Yet, yet, yet, no no Never made it as a wise man I couldn't cut it as A poor man stealing And this is how you remind me This is how you remind me This is how you remind me Of what I really am This is how you remind me Of what I really am It's not like you to say sorry I was waiting on a different story This time I'm mistaken For handing you A heart worth breaking And I've been wrong I've been down Into the bottom of every bottle These five words in my head Scream Are we having fun yet Yet, yet Are we having fun yet Yet, yet Are we having fun yet Yet, yet Are we having fun yet Yet, yet, no, no

Instant envy! I adore the man. He also became my personal hero for his active stance against scalpers who try to buy up tickets to his concerts then jack the prices for everyone. Plus he also wrote Mr. Misunderstood, which is another favorite. Carrie Undersood's "Little Toy Guns" I wish more people would remember their bad relationship is having a negative affect on their children. In between the coats in the closet She held on to that heart shaped locket Staring at a family flawless But it ain't a pretty picture tonight Mom and daddy just won't stop it Fightin' at the drop of the faucet Cuts through the walls catastrophic She's caught in the crossfire Puts her hands over her ears Starts talking through the tears She's saying, she's praying. I wish words were like little toy guns No sting, no hurt no one, just a bang bang Rolling off your tongue (I wish words were like little toy guns) Yeah, no smoke, no bullets No kick from the trigger when you pull it, no pain, no damage done (I wish words were like little toy guns) And just a bang bang rolling off your tongue (I wish words were like little toy guns) Wish there was a white flag waving Or that they were both just faking And it was just a game they were playing Like shoot'em up cowboys Leave the plastic pistols in the front yard Throw away the score card And just turn off all the noise. I wish words were like little toy guns No sting, no hurt no one, just a bang bang Rolling off your tongue (I wish words were like little toy guns) Yeah, no smoke, no bullets No kick from the trigger when you pull it, no pain, no damage done (I wish words were like little toy guns) And just a bang bang rolling off your tongue (I wish words were like little toy guns) Oh I wish they didn't cut like a knife I wish they didn't break you inside I wish they didn't bang bang make you wanna run, yeah Like little toy guns No sting, no hurt no one, just a bang bang Rolling off your tongue (I wish words were like little toy guns) Yeah, no smoke, no bullets No shot from the trigger when you pull it, no pain, no damage done (I wish words were like little toy guns) And just a bang bang rolling off your tongue (I wish words were like little toy guns) Oh like little toy guns "Concrete Angel" too, but that one is so hard to listen to I end up bawling my eyes out every time. I wish people would pay attention to it though, and its message. Forget about "Alyssa Lies" the first time I heard it I had to pull over to the side of the road and cry while my lion dog licked the tears from my face and tried to comfort me. Those are the lyrics and songs that get to me, really bad.

You're welcome. It's a wonderful song that comforts me on really bad days. My thoughts and prayers for you and your mom. Another current favorite is by Eric Church: Kill A Word If I could kill a word and watch it die I'd poison "never," shoot goodbye Beat "regret" when I felt I had the nerve Yeah, I'd pound "fear" to a pile of sand Choke "lonely" out with my bare hands I'd hang "hate" so that it can't be heard If I could only kill a word I'd take "brokeness" out back And break "heartbreak," stand there and laugh Right in its face while shootin' it the bird I'd put "upset" down in its place I'd squeeze the life out of "disgrace" Lay "over" under six cold feet of dirt If I could only kill a word If I could only kill a word Give me sticks, give stones Bend my body, break my bones Use staff and rod to turn me black and blue Cause you can't unhear, you can't unsay But if were up to me to change I'd turn "lies" and "hate" to "love" and "truth" If I could only kill a word I'd knock out "temptation"'s teeth I'd sever "evil," let it bleed Then light up "wicked," stand and watch it burn I'd take "vice" and I'd take "vile" Tie 'em up there with "hostile" Hang 'em high and leave 'em for the birds If I could only kill a word So give me sticks, give stones Bend my body, break my bones Use staff and rod to turn me black and blue Cause you can't unhear, you can't unsay But if were up to me to change I'd turn "lies" and "hate" to "love" and "truth" If I could only kill a word If I could only kill a word

Jessie J's song "I Miss Her" for my mom who has Alzheimer's. "I miss her, even though she's still here." That one line says everything.