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fantasia2004

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About fantasia2004

  • Birthday 04/24/1972

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  1. I guess what I really don't like about myself that I have been allowing all types of people to walk all over me including friends when I should have put a halt to it. When I do speak up for myself, they take it likely or become offended by my comments whether I write my opinions or speak vocally on them. I would like to be taken seriously on things that matter to me and not let others feel that they can treat me however they choose. I feel this is one battle i am not winning at all.
  2. How can you regain confidence if you lost yourself and are ridddled with guilt and don't like yourself at all? What do people mean by living drama free?
  3. The more she focuses on the hurt and what he did to her it would never allow her to heal. For her, she will be the bigger person and be able to move on.
  4. Thanks allgood for your insight as well.
  5. God is good but for some stupid reason, I am still seeking approval from the wrong people. Where I am taking classes, people (and there are a few) choose to ignore or avoid me for silly or crazy reasons I have no control over. People are not respecting me like they should. I want the respect all over.
  6. What you say is exactly what I am feeling. I find that very scary but in a good way. Even the mentioning of Indiana Jones (one of my favorite adventure movies!) It makes perfect sense. I just don't want to spend the rest of my life trying to figure out who I am when I should already know. I want to be established. I refuse to feel guilty for being selfish. I want to be at a peaceful moment in my life while learnng as you say to be "comfortable" with myself
  7. Forgive him regardless. If not, then you will forever tirelessly give him power and you will be so unhappy with negative thoughts. I read your advice. You are way smarter than this. So don't let me or others who look up to you down.
  8. Never mind asking her if she is ready, she should have already forgiven this guy from the minute he called. Kate 111, Because you did not stoop to his level or beg for him back, just like you said he felt guilty and wanted to speak his peace with you so he can be free from the "guilt"
  9. Thank you I appreciate that favor. I used to be the type that would enjoy being miserable. Not anymore. I am looking to be a changed person. Now more than ever?
  10. I can suggest to you to start going to the movies by yourself. It will slowly but surely cure your need to be with people on a constant basis. Worked for me and so it can for you. Try it.
  11. Hypocrite is the perfect word for the two faced term. Like an Oreo. Black on the outside white filling on the inside. Which means, it should be real with one fluent color throughout . If that makes any sense.
  12. I am not trying to call the Lord's name in vain. I am someone who is trying to shake off her pessimism. So many interesting things have happened since then. I finally obtained a job that somewhat interests me. I was recently baptized in church. I told most of my friends and they are or seem happy for me. I know that having the smallest things in life will not technically make me happy I would have to make myself happy. My mind should be on the positive right about now. Yet I still feel depleted. NO one I mean friendsand family)is available to hang out with me because I push them away and because they live such busy lives. I feel that I cannot be grateful for what I have been blessed with right now even though I am unsure what the future holds. I am so stressed, that trying to let go of the stress and giving it to God seems out of the question. I seem so crazy depending on others to satisfy my desire to not being alone. I have been continuoulsy suffering from anxiety and panic atacks including bouts of depression where it makes me feel like completing tasks at my new job harder when it is pretty simple that a child can do it. I am so afraid of failure. I rarely speak up for myself when others treat me like the doormat. Ugh! Am I acting like a 4 year old screaming for attention? Or am i closer to realizing my faults and learning to grow up and take responsiblity? Or am i just a wacko seeking sympathy? My back hurts currently as i write this and i am so close to tears. I should be happy that things are looking in the right direction. Why do i need to please others so much inorder to like me or accpet me? Why do I need to be such a perfectionist? I am afraid of having a mental breakdown. This is a cry of desperation because I have no idea what I should do next say next or where to go next. Or if I shoul be praying to God for inspiration. Thank you my fellow members and non-members. Fanatasia
  13. I think this a great post for all types of relationships. I read this and thought to myself how silly and arrogant I have been to myself and to others! I pray that I am able to change my ways and look and accept others for who they are instead of what I want them to be. Finally after holding in hostility and refusing to speak up for myself, I realized that I am worth being treated fairly and with respect. Question is, is it ever too late to change your ways? I feel so guilty now.
  14. Most importantly just be yourself and be prepared. Good luck!
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