jonesyjakk

after tonight......................f.............................youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1 jonesy

If i could speak to her right now, id say "is this still really what you wanted for your son, is it so much better now that this is the life you want? am i such a bad guy that i would not be worth working things out with, learning from our mistakes and making things better? am i that bad of a guy?" i would say- "dont you understand that you ruined me, in the weeks after we split, you knew how badly i wanted you back, and you continued to feed your ego and your guilt, by stamping on my face repeatedly...so do you understand why now, i hate you, and that i hate what youve done, and why i truly want NOTHING at all to do with you, and why ive asked you repeatedly to leave me alone, and not make any demands of me, yet you have continued" i would ask- "why did you text me that on sunday? why? dont you understand what you have done to me? to our family? and to our son? why are you still trying to mess with my head? why? You are with another man, you have your life and i have mine, move on, or come and get me...either way make your choice and stick to it, you cant have both, if you want me back, im here, im here for you, i dont know why i would want you back, but i promised you i would never shut the door on our family just like id never have walked out on you and our son.....if you want me, lets work it, and if you dont...then stay out of my life, we will not speak ever, you can tell me anything about our son that i may need to know, but i dont need to know about you, i couldnt care if youre living with ya guy, if ya getting engaged, married buying a house nothing i dont care i dont need to know....im happy not knowing, i trust you with our son, and that you wouldnt put him in danger, so keep ya life to yaself, and stay away from me...you have caused and created so much damage in our world, that i fear your voice everytime you call! please make your choice and stick with it forever. i miss you, i still love you, take care, good bye" jonesy

i dont even know how many days its been....that feels good!

this just made me sad.....i used to love laying next to her while she slept next to me...used to feel so lucky....!

it hurts how you left, i dont think you even think i know you left for another guy, i do believe you think i am as naive as you. i understand why you left, but not how you did it. i hope you dont regret it as you will feel the amount of agony i have, but by then i will be pain free and not there to help you through it as you haven't been for me. Jonesy

i hope you know what you are doing for our sons sake you silly woman!

Once upon a time..... there was a boy who gave his heart to a girl, he jumped into love without a parachute and then he started to fall no matter what she did, no matter what was done he always knew she was there and that she would be the one until one day a child and nearly nine years on she threw is heart into the bin, turned and she was gone he saw the gates of hell in his eyes and she fell for another man the boy looked down at his shattered face and then it all began he took the first piece of his broken heart and placed it in his chest he swore he would fix every single piece and simply would not rest now she's gone and all thats left is the face of his son to ensure he turns this little man into a perfect gentleman the boy did fix his heart, and he did fix his soul he will live happily ever after because you're worth nothing at all. The end. jonesy

I've posted this on my thread too but posting it here to get some extra help. ok guys this is where i really need your help because things could start getting tricky. Since we broke up I have started going out every pay day with all the boys from work. with that said, our next night out is the 12 march. The ex's b'day on the 7th march.....she text tonight, and I was waiting for this..... Sorry to text. Can you have our son on the 12 march (sat night so she can go out for her bday) and drop him back sunday and then pick him up again after work as normal? ARGH! ok here's my dilemma! firstly, if I go out, I know we will end up in the same place pissed...I will be with the girl I have been flirting with and she may or may not be all over some dude! If I say yes I will have him, I will be giving up something I have started as a moving on thing....going out every pay day with the boys If I say no, am I being a di"k? If I text and say sorry am out with boys from work, been planned for weeks. How will that make me look to her? I know i won't get brownie points if i have him, and I do my share of the parenting here, not like I don't ever see my kid. I wan't to do the right thing here, I don't want her thinking I am only going out to hope to bump into her, because I am not. What is the right road here? how do I play this one? This is where it all gets sticky now isn't it. HELP HELP HELP HELP! Jonesy

Ha....Jumpman, geez.....this is a bit crazy. I am 28 and she is 27, we met when we were 19 and 20. She also enjoys clubbing and going out with the girls alot. Man, that's crazy. You defo don't see it until they are gone. crazy. I will have a read of your story, what is the name of the post i will see if i can find it. Mine is no contact wish i had the strength to do this from the start if you wanna read. maybe we will have simularities by the sounds of it.

we were also young getting together, i guess my problem is i settled for her, we let our relationship slide a bit and didn't appreciate eachother. Then she says she wants to be on her own, looking forward to having a place of her own etc etc. I think about the last 6 months of our relationship and I think that neither of us would ever want to go back to that. My problem is simply this......I have realised what I had, and my life was a far better place with her than without her. I loved the 3 of us being together albeit we ended up not doing much together at all. The fact we have a kid gives me hope everyday....I HATE HAVING HOPE...but its there. I feel like this........I will go enjoy my life and you go enjoy yours, get everything out of your system and i will do the same.....then hopefully over time we can rekindle what we once had and be a family stronger and better and always remembering the LOVE. However....right now....I feel she will never get back with me, never miss me, never realise we did have a good thing. I fear she may be the type of girl who says once its done its done...thats the impression i have had all the while getting some other mixed signals that it may not be the case. I don't want to go on like this......swapping him every xmas.....school hols.....its not what I wanted ever.....I would like to get my family back but fear it will never happen. So I have to get on with it and make the best of it and respect what she wants....I hope you get what you want Jump...I really do, cos it's horrible....but whatever happens I know the hurt will pass and I will be happy with another or on my own, either way...eventually I'm sure everyone on ena will be happy or die trying! Best of happiness to everyone here...and much love Jonesy

my ex fiance left me after nearly 9 years our first break up ever, we been split for nearly 3 months now and have a kid, i did the begging in the first month and have been strictly contact over my son nothing else. i had mixed feelings reading this......firstly reassuring me nc was good thing as i really want to ask her back and to text and phone her and this made me think im doing the right thing to heal, but also made me feel like theres also hope she may miss me......grrrr....i want the hope to go.......good post jumpman it made me feel alot better

hadn't heard from her in a few days til sunday, then she text saying hi, hope ur ok, drop our boy to you at 4.15, i said yep brill, then she text monday about some bills from our old house, i kept it short n sweet, then she started talking to me about our son, i replied what she wanted to hear, she then said something else about our son and i stopped the conversation.....nc at all today.....! I wonder what she's up to, and wonder of she feels the same, like you barx, i should stop wondering too!

i know it hurts man, im going through the pain too, but dude, ask yourself is this what you want.....dude find someone closer to home, someone you can spend night after night loving, and can love you back.....dude you deserve to be happy buddy...and you will be......let her go man....and be strong, smile and take some time for fun, when you're ready dude, go find your love that will be there night after night for you through thick and thin!

Jake.......another guy? alarm bells dude! if she loved you there'd be no other guy! why is your attention not good enough? another guy? there's millions of great girls out there dude! ones that would never need another guy because jake is what they want...........best for you to start working on letting go man, don't trust anyone who needs attention from another dude..........you should be all she needs.....!!!! your choice, up to you what you do, me personally.....i'd be in the pub chatting to a new girl by now!

man 6 days no contact!!!!!! I went from moving out the last of my stuff last sunday, and watching her pack up our lives and move into a new flat.....monday....nc, tues, nc, a hard day, wed, nc not too bad, thurs nc, fri nc and then.............text..........she sends me this on my sat........."hi, everything ok, just letting you know my new address is......it's hard to get to and parking is bad so let me know if you wanna meet me somewhere to pick up your son" Felt like she was saying i don't want you to come here yet so i thought....you know, im not gonna text you til tomorrow, on my terms, and i went 6 days nc, we never gone 6 days in 8 n half years, and you know it felt good. I text her this morning, "drop him to me half 4 then, brill" she text back, "yes k, your work yeah?" i text back "yup" That was that.......i felt crap after speaking to her i know i have to for my son but i wish i didn't have to speak to her ever again to be honestt. I went from feeling rubbish to feeling quite content with the last 2 n half months and was looking forward to seeing my boy. I had nice clothes on, made sure my hair looked good, had nice aftershave on and waited in the car, she turned up.............. Man she had a frown.....she had a big bag of my stuff in the car.......i said is that mine then? she said yeah......then i put it in the car and took some other stuff, she seemed really awkward with me......i was smiling and happy and was like yeah no, no prob, then she was saying his eyes are bad and i put him in the car, i was laughing and joking with him and smiling. then she had a big frown and was like whats happening wed then? i said i just meet you here then half 8....she thought and paused and was like ok....then i went back to my son and she got in her car and drove off like she couldn't wait to get away from me........... what was that about eh????? when i have picked him up in the past, she has been like, who's that? it's daddy.....and been really ok with me i have been the one who has been off because i have been in so much pain. Today, i felt like i was the one who had left her and she was really off with me. im not looking too much into it, wed she may be happy as larry but today i didn't get the vibe that she is doing great.....she may be fine, but to leave me with the impression she is pissed off and unhappy, man it felt good....and helped me, i'd have been gutted if she was really smiley and happy now she is in her new place. So.......i feel good right now, been flirting with a girl at work too, i don't find her attractive but she's a great laugh and well it's nice to have someone show interest and help my self esteem at the mo. So, whatever that was all about when i picked him.....great, nc from now til wed and there really shouldn't be a reason to text.....ever really unless there's a problem now....i'm quite happy having no texting and don't feel the need to contact her at all. I did however...10 mins after seeing her want to text and just say are you ok? i mean i stil love her and care for her, and well if she's struggling great, if she just having a bad day, great, but i hope there's nothing actually wrong, if i pissed her off tough, i don't care, as long as there's nothing serious. then i thought, f""k her.....if there's a prob she'll tell me right. Weird how it was tonight, weird how we've gone from texting all the time to now.....this. i'm happy right now, i'm ok.....nc really helps, it helps you heal, not nagging or begging her helps, my advice to all of you....nc HELPS YOU HEAL.....6 days of nc was great for many emotions many ups and downs but i did 6 days.....it was hard when we have never done that in nearly 9 years. to all who are in pain here, i have never felt heart ache like this before in my life....but man i'm on the road to recovery, like a broken leg heals, a broken heart heals too. I wish you all the greatest joy, smiles and happiness.....until contact day wednesday...........lets have some fun!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Jonesy