ScottR

Routerx; I have a closer emotional relationship with Ann that I do my wife. Let me qualify that statement. I've learned that Ann and I have very similar backgrounds, similar opinions on major topics, similar tastes in movies, music, theatre, etc. She and her husband also went through a loss last year that brought us closer together, as she came to me for support and help. No, I'm not confusing this last topic with love (I thought the same thing); I've been in "real" love a couple of times (and in a lot of relationships that weren't real love) in my forty-plus years, and this feels like the real thing. Ann also helps me though life's hard spots. My wife tries, but she just doesn't have the "tools" to do so. To be frank, I feel closer to Ann than I do to my wife. If she and I weren't married to other people, I would pursue a relationship with her. I just don't believe in killing two good marriages in the "hope" of beginning a relationship with Ann. My wife and I do have a good marriage, but, in a dozen years of marriage, I guess it has gone a bit "stale".

I"m a 41 year old male, married for twelve years. My wife and I are friends with a couple that we've know for about six years. Myself and the female friend (I'll call her Ann) have become very close friends during the past few years. My wife and I have a very good marriage, as to Ann (37)and her husband. During the past year or so Ann and I have become extremely close friends. When we and our spouses get together, she and I seem to dominate the conversation, and usually converse with each other. My feelings toward her during this past year have turned very intense, and, in the past few months, I've found myself falling in love with her. I am pretty sure that Ann is not aware of how I feel about her. We are good friends, and neither of us has ever made any advances toward the other. I had no intention of falling in love with her, and now that I have, am faced with a real problem. I have no intention of leaving my wife, and have no intention of cheating on my wife. Even if I did, I don't think Ann would leave her husband or cheat on him. Should I continue a friendship with Ann and her husband, or discontinue it? I find myself thinking about her all the time, and every time I'm with her, it hurts, knowing we wil never be together. Should I tell her how I feel?