eltee
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For the guys out there, if you had sex with a girl the first night you met her, do you consider the possibility that she could be someone you could date OR does the fact that she gave it up so easily sway you to think otherwise (like, oh, shes a tramp. no future there). But what if she had a fun smart personality? Would you contact your one night stand afterwards if she was a cool person and you have fun with her?
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you bring up very valid opinions and I appreciate it...it did hit a chord in me. thnx
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hockeyboy - no. she MAY know of me as a "friend". I don't ask. Luscious - hmmm.. thats a hard one. Deep down, I know better that that. He is enjoyable to have in my life as a friend. I wish i had all the answers, but i'm just letting it ride.
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maybe to see if this friendship is possible with the baggage that we hold from the past. can people move forward? are friendships worth testing? stuff like that...
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No, i had a brief relationship with a married man. I am single. He is still married. We are friends.
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Has anyone met up again with someone they had a brief (or long) "affair" with after a long while has passed since. How was it? Is a friendship possible after so long? I'm meeting with mine this weekend and was hoping for some advise from those who have experienced it. To make a long story short, we ARE friends now. A year and a half has passed since our last "morally wrong" encounter. let me know your thoughts on reuniting and formulating a friendship again with them. Note: I know a lot of you have strong opinions on this, so what i dont want to hear is "DON'T SEE HIM". We all learn and figure out things our own way, you know?
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Married man cheating and not regretting it UPDATE!
eltee replied to Mike_Wazowski's topic in Infidelity
I won't give you sympathy, BUT I won't judge you or demean you either. People make a lot of mistakes in life, we all aren't angels and others will never know how it feels to be in your shoes while making the wrong choices. We can only look ahead and learn from the mess we've made. Even though, it took HER breaking up with you to see the mess you've cause, you still acknowledge that you screwed up, and that is a great way to change yourself. Reflect on it but move ahead. There IS obviously something that's not right in your current marriage that made you stray, so what you CAN do is seriously focus on that. Bring up the issue of unhappiness to your wife and seek counselling. If you stray again, please do us all a favor and close the door first before opening a new one. -
hey pineapple girl, your posting was very very interesting, raw and true. overall, you nailed it. bottom line, an affair is about lies... lies get you nowhere. it can be a hard habit to break... esp with men, because they tend not to like confrontation with women they care about. ive been involved with a MM.. but it was very brief, but nonetheless, very very intense. i walked away rather quickly because it hurt too much and i saw nothing good and true in it if we were to continue. we had legitimate strong feelings for eachother, and my desire to be with him was insanely huge.. BUT i said my goodbye and told him to do what he needed to do... and now, everyday gets easier for me to let go. my heart will always remember, but my day to day pain is slowly disappearing. no one is prepared or WANTS to get involved with an unavailable man. timing sucks..but stuff happens for a reason. its how we handle it that makes us who we are. I wouldnt expect you to say if you could go back, you would change it. I wouldnt either... it makes us who we are. we learn so much from it. In 10 years, we might be an incredible person from all this. old soul as they might call it. but bottom line, love is a powerful thing. its hard to let it go. you're doing great... just remember what you're worth. dont settle and put yourself in a place where you forget everything you stand for as a woman. if you ever want to vent, write me (personal message). I'm always down for communication. I tend to write my thoughts out because it relieves the pain.
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a year ago, i was in your shoes. A single girl falling for a (who at the time i didn't know) Married Man. I didnt take it far phsyically (kissed at most), and once i found out (after the lies had revealed itself) i walked away in shambles. I truly cared about him, had great chemistry and fancied this man a lot. But for it to be "right" and for what i deserved and wanted, I had to leave. I cared about him so much, that i wanted him to either work it out or leave his wife all on his own. I believe in destiny.. and the right kinda love will come back to you. Bottom line, it should be "easier" than this. I'm not about to live a life of deceit and put his wife through extra heart ache. I havent talked to him for a year. Just recently we started emailing again and it was nice to catch up. We still have strong feelings for eachother, but that is that. UNTIL he makes a choice, I have to stay out of the picture. If this is my "one and only" than he will come back. Have faith. If he doesnt, than he was not it. I believe the same thing in your case too. We deserve the truth. We deserve only the best. Don't settle, even tho you think "wow, he is sooo the one for me".... but hello! He's someone else's husband. Someone else's "one". Let them deal with it. Be strong and walk away.
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I have a friend who has been married now for a little over a year, and knew his wife for 7 years before that. Bottom line, things have gone sour, and he doesnt want to be in the marriage anymore. his wife's family is pushing him to seek counseling with her... and he feels like he owes it to her and her family just to try it, even tho he doesnt want to, because he feels like its just a bandage over a gunshot wound. If he goes into counseling with her, how long does that process take? what do they discuss? is it worth it? is it a temporary thing that makes everything seem better, but then just goes back to its original state of misery? has anyone gone through this or been in my friend's shoes?
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For those women who have been with guys that later confessed they were really gay, what were the signs? How do you know if the guy you are with is? i know this is a general vague question, but there might be valid signs that i never saw before that i should be seeing.
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so being gay or bi is definitely not an option in this case? I mean, if he had doubts about me he would not be asking to see me again (3rd date) correct? I have myself doubting myself now. Like, does he like me? does he like women? most likely he DOES dig me, right? so i definitely should call him tonight and tell him i had a great time...
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so if the guy seems like he likes me but is insecure about that penile dysfunction, what can i do to help him... make him feel comfortable. I know i want to call him and thank him for a nice night. Should i bring anything up or let him bring it up if he feels like it. I do like him a lot, and i think that kinda thing is trivial and can be worked out later... i'm wondering where his head is at now. he rushed out of my place so fast afterwards... i wonder what he was thinking...
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i cant see the web page link you sent. can you copy and paste the text from it in here?
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This guy is heterosexual from what i know. He asked me out in a club, we went out on a few dates, and just recently we started making out and were about to have sex. i mean we kinda did, but his penis couldn't stay hard. The whole time it wasnt hard actually. But he instigated the make out session and kissed and moved really well. so i was confused... We had a conversation before and he said he wanted to get his penis pierced. I thought it was odd because this guy isnt a punk rock star, hes conservative. So i'm wondering if there is a reason he is getting it. For it to be aroused more...? do you know lots of straight guys who just cant get it up? and if you do, why cant they? physical handicap? mental? i want to stay in touch with him and still hang out, but im afraid he might be embarrassed. He actually blamed it on too much alcohol, cause we were kinda having casual drinks that night... but i think that was an excuse. point being, he was aware of it. i would love to learn as much info on this topic as possible. thanks all