James Lucoff

James Lucoff is Director of Empathic Coaching Associates and is an authorized Relationship Enhancement educator. Relationship Enhancement has been cited by researchers as one of the most effective relationship skills programs. Empathic Coaching Associates teaches individuals and couples internationally via telephone and video conferencing in private sessions. Visit their web site at http://empathic.homestead.com.

Articles
Results 1 - 15 of 23
Secrets, Lies, and Deception What do you do when your spouse lies to you over and over about the same issues, then says
The See-Saw This story is a metaphor about relationships that become systems. In this article we draw from the field of systems thinking, which itself is based on cybernetics, the science that provided the foundation for industrial automation and computer
Staying in the Here and Now One of the core Relationship Enhancement skills is the Expressive skill. The Expressive skill guidelines help us to avoid saying things that will trigger a defensive reaction from our partner. For example, instead of saying You
Compatibility I often hear about couples breaking up because of incompatibility. The concept of compatibility has been around for many years, and many have accepted this as a fundamental truth of relationships. According to this axiom, people, like chemicals, can be
Personal Journaling and Your Relationships Some years ago I faced some difficult personal issues that were very distressing. Naturally this also had an effect on my relationships with others. When a close friend urged that I begin a daily journal, I resisted his suggestion. But when I finally star
See More Clearly with the Pre-marital Inventory It is important to understand that the pre-marital inventory is not a compatibility test. Its main purpose is to bring to the surface the conflicts that are in every relationship so the couple can address these before marriage.
Making Your Relationship Bank Account Grow Dr. Willard Harley talks a lot about our relationship bank accounts. Think about the significant persons in your life. Your current overall feelings about them are probably derived from the sum of all the transactions you
Looking for the Positive Marriage researcher John Gottman has made an intensive study of how people interact in their relationships. Not surprisingly, he found that in flourishing marriages the participants express more positive, appreciative comments toward one another than
Honesty in Relationships Honesty or rather lack of it has made major headlines this year. Serious breaches of integrity involving religious & business leaders have surfaced with repercussions yet to be realized. It is clear that honesty is vital to the health of all
The Game of Untangling During the introduction of a recent workshop I played a brief recording of a couple demonstrating the use of Relationship Enhancement skills. Afterwards there was the usual reaction, They just kept repeating what the other person said.
Stop and Smell the Roses In his best-seller Faster: The acceleration of just about everything, James Gleick confronts us with society
Clearing a Space for Empathy A few days ago my wife reminded me that I had procrastinated handling a particular responsibility and said she felt disrespected as a result. My response? Defensive rebuttal - this matter was not really all that important, I tried to explain.
Relationship Enhancement at the Workplace When Dr. Bernard Guerney hit upon teachable skills that helped couples resolve conflict and enhance closeness in their relationships, it wasn
Building Love in Your Relationship We recently received the following question: Can this help people who were
Relationship Enhancement Quiz! Here's a quiz based on our recent Relationship Tips articles. Sharpen your pencils, put on your empathic thinking caps, and test your knowledge!

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