Cancer : Your Mind and Feelings, Stress

by National Cancer Institute

(Page 9 of 16)

Just as cancer treatment affects your physical health, it affects the way you feel, think, and do the things you like to do. Besides causing many emotions that may surprise you, the treatment may actually change the way your brain works. Just as you need to take care of your body after treatment, you need to take care of your emotions.

Each person's experience with cancer is different and unique, and the feelings, emotions, and fears that you have are unique as well. The values you grew up with may affect how you think about and deal with cancer. Some people may feel they have to be strong and protect their friends and families. Others seek support from loved ones or other cancer survivors or turn to their faith to help them cope. Some find help from counselors and others outside the family, while others do not feel comfortable with this approach. Whatever you decide, it is important to do what's right for you and not compare yourself to others.

Here are some common feelings other people have had after cancer treatment.

Fear That Cancer Will Come Back

Worrying about the cancer coming back (recurring) is normal, especially during the first year after treatment. This is one of the most common fears people have after cancer treatment. Even years after treatment, this fear may always be in the back of their minds.

For some, the fear is so strong that they no longer enjoy life, sleep well, eat well, or even go to follow-up visits. "If I get it again, what am I going to do?" one woman said. "I never thought I'd make it through the first time." Of course, not everyone reacts this way. As one survivor put it, "[Cancer] is just part of life, and we always have hope."

As time goes by, many survivors report that their fear of cancer coming back becomes less, and they find themselves thinking less often about their cancer. However, even years after treatment, some events can cause you to become worried about your health. These may include:

• Follow-up visits
• Anniversary events (like the date you were diagnosed or had surgery or ended treatment)
• Birthdays
• Illness of a family member
• Symptoms similar to the ones you had when you found you had cancer
• The death of someone who had cancer
• Personal reminders. For example, one person said he used to go to a particular restaurant during chemotherapy because the milkshakes they served were the only thing he could stand to eat. After treatment, he found he had to stop going to the restaurant because it reminded him of treatment and made him "sick to his stomach."

Tips: Coping With Fear of Cancer Returning

How do you cope with fear of cancer returning? Here are some ideas that have helped others deal with fear and feel more hopeful:

Be informed. Learning about your cancer, understanding what you can do for your health now, and finding out about the services available to you can give you a greater sense of control. Some studies even suggest that people who are well informed about their illness and treatment are more likely to follow their treatment plans and recover from cancer more quickly than those who are not.

Express feelings of fear, anger, or sadness. Being open and dealing with their emotions helps many people feel less worried. People have found that when they express strong feelings like anger or sadness, they are more able to let go of these feelings. Some sort out their feelings by talking to friends or family, other cancer survivors, or a counselor. Of course, if you prefer not to discuss your cancer with others, you should feel free not to. You can still sort out your feelings by thinking about them or writing them down on paper.

Thinking and talking about your feelings can be hard. Some people just want to move on. They put the thought of cancer and all that goes with it out of their minds. While it is important not to let cancer "rule your life," it may be hard to do. If you find cancer is "taking over" your life, it may be helpful to find a way to express your feelings.

Work toward having a positive attitude, which can help you feel better about life now. Sometimes this means looking for what is good even in a bad time or trying to be hopeful instead of thinking the worst. Use your energy to focus on wellness and what you can do now to stay as healthy as possible.

Don't blame yourself for your cancer. Some people believe that they got cancer because of something they did or did not do. This is usually not true—and you should not dwell on feeling this way. Remember, cancer can happen to anyone.

You don't need to be upbeat all the time. Many people say they want to have the freedom to give in to their feelings sometimes. As one woman said,"When it gets really [bad], I just tell my family I'm having a bad cancer day. I ... cancel all my appointments. I go upstairs and crawl into bed."

Find ways to help yourself relax. The exercises within Practicing Relaxation to Relieve Pain and Stress 12 have been proven to help others and may help you relax when you feel worried.

Be as active as you can. Getting out of the house and doing something worthwhile can help you focus on other things besides cancer and the worries it brings.

Control what you can. Some people say that putting their lives in order makes them feel less fearful. Being involved in your health care, keeping your appointments, and making changes in your lifestyle are among the things you can control. Even setting a daily schedule can give you more power. And, while no one can control every thought, some say they've resolved not to dwell on the fearful ones.

Feeling Stress

When you were diagnosed, you may have put certain issues aside for a while, such as concerns about family, work, or finances. Now that treatments are over, these issues may begin to resurface just when you are tired and may feel that there is already too much to handle.

Many cancer survivors also worry that stress may have played a role in their illness. It is important to remember that the exact cause of many cancers is still unknown. No research shows that stress causes cancer, but stress can cause other health problems. Finding ways to reduce or control the stress in your life may help you feel better.

Tips: Reducing Stress

Many survivors have found activities like the ones below useful in dealing with cancer and their worries after treatment ends. Ask your doctor, nurse, social worker, or local cancer organization about taking part in activities like these.

Exercise. Exercise is a known way to reduce stress and feel less tense—whether you've had cancer or not. As one man put it: "I can feel down a little bit, and it is a fine line with depression, but when I walk 45 or 50 minutes in the fresh air, I feel like I can take on the world sometimes." See your doctor before making an exercise plan, and be careful not to overdo it. If you cannot walk, ask about other types of exercise that may be helpful.

Dance or Movement. People can act out their feelings about cancer in classes using dramatic and/or dance-style body movements. Other class members talk about the issues the "performer" was trying to express.

Sharing Personal Stories. Telling and hearing stories about living with cancer can help people learn, solve problems, feel more hopeful, air their concerns, and find meaning in what they've been through. See Joining a Support Group 9 for support group information.

Music and Art. Even people who have never sung, painted, or drawn before have found these activities helpful and fun.

About the Author

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