Book Description

As a parent, if you're not sure what you believe about alcohol use, how will you handle the subject with your child? Maybe you experimented with drinking as a teen, or you use alcohol regularly as an adult. Maybe you never tried alcohol, or you have strong feelings against its use. Maybe you're wondering whether teen drinking is a rite of passage, or you're simply confused over conflicting information about alcohol use, abuse, and addiction. The best way for you to help your teen make healthy choices is to be informed. This much-needed book about America's most accessible and socially sanctioned psychoactive drug helps parents sort through the latest facts, the known risks, and the divergent perspectives on alcohol use. The basic message? For teens, drinking alcohol equals risk. Your basic message? That's up to you.

Chapter 3

Adolescence and Alcohol: What's the Attraction?

Any discussion of alcohol abuse and alcoholism is incomplete and almost meaningless without discussing the potential victims: the teens. This section looks at the nature of teens as developing adults and the reasons why some teens are at higher risk for alcohol abuse and addiction.

New Beginnings

Adolescence is a period of powerful transition and change. It is a time of awakening, of new beginnings, of transition, and of unparalleled growth. In fact, no period of time in human development, save the first two years of life, can compare to adolescence when it comes to development and change.

Out of the generally benign and protected world of childhood emerges the teenager, faced with the daunting task of becoming an adult in an increasingly demanding world. Our teen is learning who he is, what he values, and what he can become. His body is evolving into a full adult, with all the powers and appetites and feelings that accompany adulthood. He is discovering similarities in and differences between what he is taught in his family and in larger society.

A teenager is learning how others in this big world will accept and respond to her. She is deciding if she can compete in this world and what makes her unique or special. She is in the process of making the transition from a self-absorbed state of "me" to becoming part of something bigger, but it is still very much about her. She feels that everybody is watching her and judging what she does. Healthy growth is a process of transition from self-absorption and self-justification to becoming more other-focused.

Newly equipped with physical and sexual powers and presented with new and exciting opportunities and interests, teens lack the maturity of years, the wisdom of experience, and the fully developed capacity to reason with logic. It is an exciting yet challenging time for a teen. He may be fearful or uncertain about himself. He may be running as fast as he can toward adulthood with unbridled gusto and excitement. He may be running away from the pains and discomforts of childhood. He may be caught in difficult transitions by psychological, physical, and mental challenges that make competing in the adult world difficult and discouraging.

Our child's perception of his potential in the world of adulthood is determined by what he has learned from his role models and what he has experienced thus far in his life. We who were once perfect and superhuman in our child's eyes have become flawed and out of touch with reality. Our teen may begin to question rules, policies, and family traditions as unrealistic, unfair, or undesirable. He begins to look beyond us and other family members for role models and support. It is not that he necessarily wants to reject and abandon his home support system, but he wants to free himself from home base and explore the intriguing and exciting world beyond.

Adolescence is characterized by moodiness and emotional volatility. Not only are the hormones in flux, but teens also have intense concerns about acceptance by others and about competitiveness. Teens are seeking to achieve emotional independence from their parents. They can be grumpy, noncommunicative, sarcastic, and sullen. I remember as a teen going through entire meals without saying a thing, and when someone spoke to me, they were greeted with a grunt. Yet when my mother caught me at the front door on my way to high school and said, "You're going to be a great man someday," I walked to school a little taller and with more confidence. Of course, I never told her that! Moods and behaviors can sometimes be so volatile and so uncharacteristic of the children we knew that it can seem that they are no longer our children.

Alcohol abuse and alcoholism affect our teen's already volatile moods and behaviors. The mood of alcoholic teens can change—rather quickly—to sullenness, volatility, anxiety, and depression. Their lifestyle often changes: choice of music may evolve toward drug-related lyrics; they may give up old friends for using friends; they can become negligent and defiant about chores and expected roles; their sleeping and eating patterns can change; their behavioral changes might include staying out late, sleeping late, extreme tiredness, loss of appetite, unwillingness to participate in family activities, truancy from school, or conflicts with school and community officials.

Of course, some of this type of behavior is also typical of normal adolescent changes, so it can be difficult for parents to tell the difference. However, there are ways to tell whether the changes are due to hormones or alcohol use. We should look at our entire teen, not just at one symptom, such as a change in moods. We can look at friends and relationships, school performance, family, emotions, and work ethic, and make comparisons and draw inferences. Alcohol abuse becomes more visible when we look at the many dimensions of a child's life.

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© 2000 Health Communications, Inc.

Tags: Parenting Teenagers, Parenting and Families, Alcoholism, Teens, Substance Abuse and Teens

About the Author

Stephen Biddulph is a former family, marriage, and child counselor who also worked as a supervising therapist and director of adolescent substance abuse and addiction treatment at Provo Canyon School in Utah. A national seminar lecturer, he currently serves as dean of students and auxiliary services at Southern Virginia College. He is a retired major from the United States Marine Corps, is married, and is the father of six children.