Book Description

If you're familiar with some of those dreary feelings that just won't go away-anger, confusion, frustration, tension and sadness-this breakthrough book is for you and those you love. These are some of the feelings we experience when we're out of balance-feelings that affect us physically, from a knot in the stomach to a serious addiction. Modern life is so complex, exciting, interesting, and demanding, it's easy to be carried away … to be out of balance and feel out of control.

In The 7 Systems of Balance, renowned psychiatrist and Harvard Medical School alumnus, Dr. Paul Sorgi, reveals a breakthrough approach to achieving a fully balanced life based upon scientific research and years of successfully helping thousands of people. You'll find out what really triggers feelings of imbalance, what's going on in your brain and body and, most importantly, what you can do to correct and prevent the emotional dizziness that engulfs you.

Using poignant, true stories from others who have won their own private out-of-balance battles, and by candidly revealing his personal experiences, Dr. Sorgi shows you how to develop a personalized plan for balance; not a one-size-fits-all approach that so many other books have advocated-no fad diets or false spiritual gimmicks, but practical, effective rules for finding a unique pathway to a balanced life.

The 7 Systems of Balance is a masterful blend of Dr. Sorgi's medical and psychological expertise: a book that will open new windows of discovery and new opportunities.

The Modern Problem of Balance

“I'm dealing with a possible divorce; my kids have been sick all week; I'm in debt. I have to work at night doing per diem nursing jobs to make ends meet. All I was really trying to do was to pursue my career as a nurse. I thought I had it all figured out. Then everything changed on me. It all sort of fell apart. I don't know what to do.”

As a psychiatrist with over fifteen years of experience, I help many people like Kate. Does her story above sound familiar to you? Read on, and you will see why. This kind of problem is happening everywhere. Life presents you with exciting possibilities, you try to grab for the ring, to go for the challenge, and the next thing you know, you are up to your neck in troubles and stress.

What is it all about? We all live with ancient brains that developed over the past 7 million years. And modern life, with all of its wonderful technologies, presents our ancient brains with a type of stimulation and pace for which we are unprepared. Thus, your brain reacts as it did hundreds of thousands of years ago and you lose balance. The rules for living have changed. There is so much that is possible in your career, in your family, in your leisure time. Never before have people been able to do so much with their lives. But, as is the case with Kate, everyone also seems to be struggling with lives that are out of balance. Out of balance because the world has changed drastically in the last two hundred years, and there has not been enough time to develop new rules for living.

Let's return to Kate's predicament. It will help you understand what I mean.

If I could send Kate back to live in rural Ohio in 1800, her nervous system and her life would not be out of balance. The rules for living would be clear to her. She would know what to do. Kate would have close ties with about fifty people in her community. She would live with her extended family, either under the same roof or nearby. She and her parents, her brothers and sisters, her aunts and uncles and all of their children would gather each night around the hearth, to eat, to talk, to share stories, to comfort one another. If her marriage was failing, family and neighbors would step in to help. There would be no need to consider staying up late working because everyone went to sleep when it got dark. No one worked at night. There would be no struggle with job and family. She would take care of the kids full time. Of course that would include raising food, but the family would do that together. If they could not, then her friends and neighbors would tide her over until better times arrived. The rules to guide her behavior would be clear. The rules had been the same for thousands of years. Kate would know what to do.

Now fast forward to the year 2001. Kate's extended family lives thousands of miles away. She doesn't know all of her neighbors, and the ones she does know can't help her because they work all day. She wants to stay home with her kids but everyone tells her to get a job to support herself. So she stays up late working on her computer in her virtual office. Her husband is planning to move to Los Angeles and at the same time expects joint custody of the kids because “they can fly back and forth.” There is not an hour of the day when her attention is not divided between kids, cell-phone calls, a television screen and her work. Kate's life is seriously out of balance. She feels miserable. She doesn't know what to do.

Consider all of the devices that we now have that were created in the past two hundred years. First came the industrial revolution, the automation of basic life-sustaining activities such as the production of food and clothing. In a matter of a few decades, food, clothing and shelter became widely available at low cost. Then came (in random order) the steam engine, electricity and electric lights, the automobile, the telephone, the airplane, the computer, the Internet, radio, television, cameras, video recorders, washing machines, microwaves.

Consider how life has changed. Dr. David Buss, writing in the American Psychologist, cuts right to the heart of the matter: “Modern environments have produced a variety of ills, many unanticipated and only now being discovered. . . . Modern humans . . . are bombarded by media images of attractive models on a scale that has no historical precedent and that may lead to unreasonable expectations. . . . Ancestral humans lived in extended kin networks, surrounded by genetic relatives such as uncles and aunts, nephews and nieces, cousins and grandparents. Modern humans typically live in isolated nuclear families often devoid of extended kin.”

With all of the blessings that modern life bestows, consider the challenges it presents. Challenges that are so recent and profound that the impact on our well-being is barely understood.

What happens when you live apart from extended family, when there is no one to turn to for advice, or for help with the kids when you feel sick? What happens to you when your activity is not regulated by the natural rhythms of day and night, when you can watch television, work or socialize at any time of the day or night? What happens when you are bombarded by flickering video images no matter where you turn, images that change in a decidedly fast and nonhuman manner? What happens when you no longer need to get up, to move about or to do physical work for your food? What happens to you when you are just a number, a statistic, one of millions, helplessly buffeted about by an increasingly faceless and impersonal society? What happens when you can travel across great distances by airplane in just hours, landing in a completely new time zone, new climate and new culture? What happens when you no longer have to talk to others face to face, when you can transact human business by e-mail, cell phone, voice mail and fax?

All of this boggles the mind. Or, more to the point . . . it unbalances the mind and it can unbalance your life. It is no wonder that Kate is confused. Almost anything is possible in her life!

In my work as a psychiatrist, helping thousands of people, I have learned the secrets of balance. Through my research into the biologic principles of the nervous system, I have learned the secrets of balance. Come with me, and I will show you how balance works.

You will learn the first step to balance is passion because passion is the fuel that powers your brain and your life. Go after all that life offers. Make your life rich with reward and satisfaction. Be passionate about the people in your life, about your work, about the issues that really matter.

But passion alone is not enough. Passion is what got Kate into her fix. She had a passion for nursing that she pursued with vigor. She pursued her passion for nursing to the point that it caused an imbalance, in her marriage, in her family, in her health. It sure was exciting, but it caused so much disruption that her life fell apart.

Passion must be balanced with structure. Passion works best in the right place and in the right time. Then, like a finely tuned engine, all cylinders firing, all parts meshing and smoothly lubricated, your life will race ahead.

The secret to a balanced life is in the balance of passion and structure.

What does this have to do with modern life, you might ask? Quite a lot. The wonders of our age, all of the inventions, all of the new ways to do things, all of the new ways to be in contact with others, the access to any and all sources of information, all of the new ways to travel, all of these limitless opportunities make it possible for you to pursue your passion, your ideas, your interests, your love. Unlike any other time in history, you are not limited by your position in society. You are not limited by great distance between people. You are not limited in your access to key information. You are not limited by fear of disease famine. It is the best of all times to be alive. Any person, from any walk of life, with the right combination of skill and hard work, can accomplish anything.

And so we do.

The trouble is that we have forgotten about balance. Limitless opportunity and possibility can lead to a frantic search for happiness. This is the modern dilemma. In pursuing our passion to be happy, we ultimately become unhappy. Why? The missing ingredient is balance. It is just how human beings are made. In order to be happy, your life must be balanced. Otherwise your body and brain send you powerful signals, telling you that something is wrong.

You see, your body and your brain are only trying to help you. The signals tell you that it is time to do something about the imbalance in your life or problems are sure to arise. If you think about it for a moment, it makes sense. Our bodies and brains developed during a time when life was dangerous. Our ancestors could easily go hungry, or get killed by a wild animal or a marauding band of humans, or they could easily contract a fatal disease. An imbalance was a sign of danger. Our ancestors only felt happy and at ease when all of their life-sustaining needs were satisfied. Only then, would they experience balance, the balance that came from having a full stomach, in a safe place, surrounded by family and friends. For the world of our ancestors, limitless possibility was dangerous. It meant you could starve, become ill or die a violent death.

In our world, limitless possibility is everywhere. Instead of being scared by it, we are energized (our ancestors were energized, too, but in their case, they were energized by fear). In our world, limitless possibility and pursuing passion is a good thing. It is what we all want. But our bodies and brains still react as if we are living in the world of our ancestors, 100,000 years ago. Our bodies and brains see limitless possibility and the pursuit of passion as a sign that danger is about.

The answer lies in balance. Pursuing passion is fine, so long as it is done with structure. Done in the right way, pursuing your passion can turn you on, it can lead you to new ground, it can help you to realize your dreams.

Let's return to the year 1800 to rural Ohio (I am focusing on rural life because even as long as two hundred years ago, city dwellers were already having balance problems). By this time, we human beings had figured out how to live a balanced life. But as you shall see, balance came at a cost. Modern life is better in a fundamental way, so long as you can maintain balance in your life.

In 1800 Kate would, in all likelihood, live her entire life within ten miles of home. She would live on or near the family farm. If her family was well-off, well positioned in society, then this would last throughout her life. If, on the other hand, her family was poor, there was no way for her to break the cycle of poverty. She would marry someone she had known since childhood; her husband may well have been a cousin. She would raise children and work on the farm. She would have a deep and stable involvement with her community and her church. She would become passionate about family matters-such as who was in good graces with the head of the family and who was on the outs, who was ill and who was healthy, who was in love and who was not-about local society, and about local politics. She would be passionate about survival, because in her world, survival was a key concern. Kate would spend hours worrying about and acting on outside threats, food supply and illness. These passions would be strongly balanced by the natural cycle of day and night-there were no electric lights-by the predictable routines of life, by the closeness of her family, by her strong community ties, by her sturdy religious beliefs and by the fact that her daily activities were unchanging. The balance in her life would be the same as the balance experienced by her ancestors for thousands of years in the past.

Kate's world in 1800 would be a world of conformity, of stable patterns and stable expectations. Possibilities were not limitless; they were, in fact quite limited. If she wanted a different life, she had only one choice, to leave home and become a pioneer on the frontier, endangering everything she knew and loved, just to change.

Thankfully, the modern age has given us the gift of practically unlimited possibilities for personal growth and change. And we can go after these challenges without being in danger. You can move or try a new career or even a new love life. You will not endanger your life or the life of your children by doing so. All that you risk is balance.

© 2003 Health Communications, Inc

Tags: Alternative Medicine, Health, Personal Growth, Stress

About the Author

Paul J. Sorgi, M.D., is a psychiatrist practicing in Sudbury, Massachusetts. He is a founding director of The Hallowell Center for Cognitive and Emotional Health, a practice specializing in the evaluation and treatment of depression, anxiety, attention problems and learning problems in children and adults. He attended Tufts University Medical School where he graduated as a member of the Alpha Omega Alpha National Honor Medical Society. Dr. Sorgi trained in psychiatry at the Harvard Medical School. He is currently on the faculty of Harvard Medical School and a consulting physician at McLean Hospital.