Test Your Gossip Quotient

Gossip: Ten Pathways to Eliminate It from Your Life and Transform Your Soul
by Lori Palatnik

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Discover Your GQ - “Gossip Quotient”

Take this simple 5 question quiz to find out your GQ. You can select more than one choice for each answer (be honest now):

1. As you hear some juicy gossip, are you:

a) Already planning in your head who you are going to share it with?

b) Enjoying every second of it, wishing you had heard it first?

c) Not particulary interested (or even actively listening) but not wanting to be rude and stop the speaker?

d) Getting ready to add to it with your own scoop on the situation?

e) Losing respect for who is speaking?

2. When you hear someone you know has lost money in the stock market, are you:

a) Relieved that it was him and not you?

b) Thinking about who you are going to share the news with?

c) Definitely not happy about it, yet, you have your own problems, as well. Or, not making any judgements or having any feelings either way until you hear the whole story?

d) Sure that he is getting what he deserves.

e) Feeling terrible for him and wondering how you can help?

3. You are with a friend, waiting for another friend to join you so you can head off for an evening of fun. She is late. She has done this before, and more than once. Do you:

a) Remark to your friend there how frustrating it is that this other friend is always keeping you waiting?

b) Leave before she gets there to teach her a lesson once and for all?

c) Figure that it's really no big deal and simply wait without complaining, or simply not draw any conclusions until you hear what happened?

d) Realize she is just plain selfish and doesn't value your time, so why include her next time?

e) Worry that perhaps something happened to her on the way to cause the delay?

4. You read in the paper that a couple from your social group, who you always suspected as being a little “shady”, has been accused and arrested of stock fraud and embezzlement of funds. The Laws of Proper Speech do allow you to mention this to others under specific circumstances. Why?

a) Because everyone now knows about it anyway?

b) Because it's probably true?

c) Well, actually, you choose not to talk about it or discuss it with anyone, ever!

c) Because if they were here, you would say it to their face?

d) Because there is one person you know who was planning to invest money with them and needs to know to wait and investigate for themselves based on this new information?

5. After you spend an evening with friends and most of the time was spent talking about other people who were not there, and not in a flattering way, do you feel:

a) Hey, that was such a fun night. When can we do it again?

b) Kind of guilty, but, hey, everyone does it?

c) Kind of guilty but, at least I didn't partake in the gossip and didn't pay attention to it or believe it? Or, that was kind of boring (but you never tried to change the subject either)?

d) Compelled to be the last one to leave so they don't talk about you?

e) Disgusted, knowing one day you will beg to have those hours that you just wasted put back in your life?

Scoring:

Score 1 point for every time you selected a), b) or d), score 0 points for every time you selected c) and you can subtract one point for every time you selected e).

Your GQ:

5 points or more - High GQ. You are officially a gossip. Not something to be proud of. Chances are you have hurt a lot of people in your lifetime and will probably hurt many more. Not to mention, there's a good chance your family relationships, personal relationships and business relationships (and possibly your “bottom line”) are suffering as a result. This does NOT make you a bad person. It only means that it's an important part of your life that needs work. Make a decision to improve in this area. You can do it!

3 to 4 points - Medium GQ. This is not good. You have a problem with gossip, and it probably comes back to haunt you from time to time. But there is lots of hope. You can do it!

1 to 2 points - Low GQ. You occasionally slip up, probably because of social pressure, but you are trying. Feel good about yourself for trying. Know that there is still a way to go, AND you can do it!

Zero to -5 points - Super Low GQ. You are a person that others respect and trust. Your relationships in all areas of your life are most likely very happy and healthy; and your self-esteem is most likey at a very high level. Congratulations! Either you have been blessed with a beautiful nature, or you have worked hard to develop one. Keep strong and continue to be an example for the world.

Remember . . . International EndGossip Day is November 6. Spread the word!

© 2002 Health Communications, Inc.

About the Author

Lori Palatnik is an author and Jewish educator. She has been a guest on numerous radio and television talk shows, and hosted a Toronto television show called “The Jewish Journal.” She lectures on the beauty and depth of Judaism throughout the United States and Israel, and has written articles on Jewish topics for The Jerusalem Report, Toronto Star and many other publications. Lori is the author of Friday Night and Beyond-The Shabbat Experience Step-by-Step and Remember My Soul. She now lives in Denver, Colorado, with her husband, Rabbi Yaakov Palatnik, and her five children.