Self-Acceptance

How to Succeed at Being Yourself: Finding the Confidence to Fulfill Your Destiny
by Joyce Meyer

1

For as he thinks in his heart, so is he…
PROVERBS 23:7

Do you like yourself? Most people don't like themselves, you know. I have many years of experience with people, trying to help them be whole emotionally, mentally, spiritually and socially I felt it was a major breakthrough when I simply discovered that most people really don't like themselves. Some of them know it, while others don't even have a clue that is the root of many other problems in their life.

Self-rejection and even self-hatred are the root causes of many relationship problems. God wants us to have great relationships. I have found the Bible to be a book about relationships. I find teaching in it about my relationship with God, with other people and with myself.

SEEK PEACE IN RELATIONSHIPS

…[Do not merely desire peaceful relations with God, with your fellowmen, and with yourself, but pursue, go after them!]
1 Peter 3:11

God's Word instructs us to have good relationships, but it also teaches us how to develop and maintain those relationships.

I found this particular Scripture in The Amplified Bible to be very enlightening. As I studied it, the Holy Spirit revealed to me that first I must have peace with God. I must believe that He loves me. He does not wait until I am perfected to love me; He loves me unconditionally and completely at all times. Second, I must receive His love.

Receiving is a big issue. When we receive from God, we actually take into ourselves what He is offering. As we receive His love, we then have love in us. Once we are filled with Gods love, we can begin loving ourselves. We can also begin giving that love back to God and bestowing it on other people.

Always remember: we cannot give away what we don't have!

THE LOVE OF GOD

… God's love has been poured out in our hearts through the Holy Spirit Who has been given to us.
Romans 5:5

The Bible teaches us that the love of God has been poured out in our hearts by the Holy Spirit Who has been given to us. That simply means that when the Lord, in the form of the Holy Spirit, comes to dwell in our heart because of our faith in His Son Jesus Christ, He brings love with Him, because God is love. (1 John 4:8.)

We all need to ask ourselves what we are doing with the love of God that has been freely given us. Are we rejecting it because we don't think we are valuable enough to be loved? Do we believe God is like other people who have rejected and hurt us? Or are we receiving His love by faith, believing that He is greater than our failures and weaknesses?

What kind of relationship do you have with God, with yourself and ultimately with your fellowman?

It never occurred to me that I even had a relationship with myself. It was just something I never thought of until God began teaching me in these areas. I now realize that I spend more time with myself than with anyone else, and it is vital that I get along well with me.

You are one person you never get away from.

We all know how agonizing it is to work day after day with someone we don't get along with, but at least we don't have to take that person home with us at night. But we are with us all the time, day and night. We never have one minute away from ourselves, not even one second - therefore, it is of the utmost importance that we have peace with ourselves.

WE CANNOT GIVE AWAY WHAT WE DON'T HAVE

“…Freely you have received, freely give.”
Matthew 10:8 NKJV

With the help of the Lord I learned to receive Gods love, to love myself (in a balanced way), to love God in return and to love other people. But it was neither quick nor easy because of my personal history.

It seemed to me that I had always had difficulties in relationships, and I really did not know why. I could not find people that I liked and enjoyed who also felt the same way about me. Through God's help I finally realized what the problem was: I was trying to give away something that I did not have.

As a young believer I heard sermons about the importance of Christians loving each other, and I was sincerely trying to walk in love, but I failed continually I needed to get Gods answer hooked up with my particular problem. I had heard with my ears that God loved me, but I had not really believed it for myself. I may have believed it in general, but not personally I had the problem, and I had the answer, but I was not making the right connection between the two.

Many times we know what our problem is, but we cannot seem to find the right answer to it. On the other hand, we often discover an answer in Gods Word, but we really don't know what our problem is. God wants to reveal to us the nature of our true problems and the answer to those problems that are found in His Word. When we make the right connection between them, when we hook up the right problem with the right revelation - the devil is on his way out, and freedom is on its way in.

For example, I saw in the Bible that we were to walk in love. I knew that I had a problem with love, but I did not know that my problem had roots.

We frequently try to deal with the bad fruit in our lives and never get to the root cause of it. If the root remains, the fruit will keep coming back. No matter how many times we cut it off, eventually it will come back. This cycle is very frustrating. We are trying the best we know how, and yet it seems we never find a permanent solution to our miseries.

I was desperately attempting to display loving behavior, but I had failed to receive God's love; therefore, I could not give love away I did not have any to give.

Copyright © 1999 by Joyce Meyer

About the Author

JOYCE MEYER has been teaching the Word of God since 1976 and in full-time ministry since 1980. She is the bestselling author of more than fifty inspirational books, including How to Hear from God, Knowing God Intimately, and Battlefield of the Mind. She has also released thousands of teaching cassettes and a complete video library. Joyce's Enjoying Everyday Life radio and television programs are broadcast around the world, and she travels extensively conducting conferences.