Chapter 9, Sex Versus Making Love

Are You Fit to Love: A Radically Different Approach to Successful Relationships
by Allie Ochs

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From Failing Hard Drives to Silicone Floating Devices

Let there be sex at the end of the tunnel! I don»t care about the light.
AUTHOR UNKNOWN

NO RELATIONSHIP BOOK could ever be complete without exploring the topic of sex, and no generation before us ever had such inexhaustible and even ruthless exposure to the minutest details of sex as we do. Our sex lives are attacked mercilessly for their inadequacy and failure to comply with current standards of sexual techniques. We have heard it all. From Cosmopolitan’s 100 ways to achieve orgasm right down to libido increasing foods, erection extenders and premature ejaculation prevention. Our sex lives seem to require technical updates, like computer operating systems, but when pushing the start button many face system failures!

Turning Our Lives Over to Hormones

Confronted with diverse sexual techniques and positions promising outer-space moments, many people are confused as to whether sexual activity is best enjoyed while being on top, below or hanging sideways from the ceiling. Extensive instruction manuals confirm that we lack sexual perfection and remind us of expectations to be fulfilled. Almost everywhere we turn, sex is used to entice us, to sell to us, to manipulate us or to otherwise capture our attention. Commonly, young women (many with implanted silicone floating devices) are displayed to create the notion that sex is only enjoyable with a perfect body. It is not surprising, that after watching Striptease with their man and glaring at Demi Moore’s flawless body, women everywhere are reluctant to expose their bodies to their partners. Sadly, many women suffer in silence at the sight of their not-so-perfect bodies and have become quite industrious in inventing ways to hide them. Others spend lots of money, endure pain and use a great deal of time to achieve perfect bodies.

After discovering her husband’s affair with her younger counterpart, Marla Maples, Ivana Trump spent a fortune and suffered considerable discomfort at the hands of one of the best plastic surgeons in the country. Amusingly, the new Ivana looked almost like Marla’s identical twin, but Donald still refused to dump Marla. Ivana, on the other hand, had been completely overhauled just in time to sign her divorce papers, though I am sure her divorce settlement was sufficient to fund a number of subsequent surgeries. In mint condition, Ivana managed two more divorces in a hurry, while Donald replaced Marla many times over. It doesn’t look like Donald underwent any plastic surgery to capture the most dazzling beauties, and maybe it is true that money and power have more sex appeal than an impeccable face and body.

Maintaining a flawless, youthful body and face is not as significant for men, as they are not depicted as sex objects to the same extent as women. Sex has become an over-rated subject and the cause of much unhappiness and frustration. How can we be comfortable with our own sexuality in a society that pressures us to have lots of sex that must be great every time?

About the Author

www.allieochs.com
Allie Ochs is a relationship expert, coach, speaker and author of: Are You Fit to Love? A radically different approach to successful relationships. Fit to love is based on 3 principles: mutual respect, moral responsibility and authenticity, which are at the heart of all exceptional relationships. This relationship wake-up call is not for the faint-hearted. It is for the brave, because it challenges us to become better people for each other. Allie revolutionizes relationships from the ground up and helps people improve their relationships immediately.