Ambushed and Assaulted: Coping with the Unexpected : Part 1

Turn Your Life Around: Break Free from Your Past to a New and Better You
by Dr. Tim Clinton

What happens when you can't get over the hurt?

"Life can be pretty unmerciful," writes Dr. Tim Clinton. "Loss of a loved one, loss of a job, a financial challenge or ruin, betrayal, a bad marriage, an illness like cancer: all involve that sick feeling that life is not the way it is supposed to be. When it isn't, we work to recover what we lost. If the answers don't come quickly, stomachs start to turn, ulcers bleed, tempers flare, and the wounds begin to go deep into the soul."

Those soul-deep wounds can ignite spiritual and emotional devastation, Dr. Clinton warns, unless you stop the downward spiral into despair. "The good news," Dr. Clinton writes, "is that God is always at work to win our hearts. He loves to use our brokenness and powerlessness to send us fleeing back to Him. There is a path to healing if you will cast your eyes on the Lover of your soul!"

In Turn Your Life Around, Dr. Clinton leads you on a healing path to true intimacy with God and others. The upward spiral to hope begins as you realize your utter dependence on God and rest in His affection for you. When your life begins to produce the fruit of godly action inspired by accountability with other believers, you'll find yourself alive again!

This journey toward healing and wholeness is nothing less than a marvelous work of God-and one He is thrilled to help you along. As you work to regain your heart and love for God, Dr. Clinton writes, "All hell is against your success, but more importantly, all of heaven is devoted to your success! When the destroyer is defeated in your life, you can begin to savor every moment of life. Such is God's dream for our lives."

If loss has robbed you of hope, health, and spiritual freedom, read on. In these pages lies the way back to God and the abundant life He planned for you.

Chapter 1

Life is no fun when things aren't the way they are supposed to be.

How do you live with someone who seemingly doesn't love you? How do you love someone who misuses and abuses you? It hurts to be rejected, blamed, or unjustly accused.

How do you go on when you feel all alone, when life leaves you feeling bruised, beaten, and as if you're going nowhere?

How do you parent children who think you are the worst thing that ever happened to them?

How do you cope with all of the things that compete for and against what you love and hold dear?

Why do normally sensible people abandon all hope for what should have been their blessings in Christ?

What force or elemental power is sucking the life and tearing the hearts right out of us?

Wherever you look, you'll find the eight out of every ten people who aren't living out their dreams.1 Most of them are simply worn down. They have surrendered their hopes and traded their dreams for the uniform of uniformity. They have forgotten or simply never understood God's promise of the abundant life (John 10:10).

This darkness that threatens the hearts and faith of good people is nothing less than an ambush of the heart! The assault often begins with a major disappointment or sorrow that wages war on the mind and the soul. An attack may begin in quiet ways, creeping in on the back of chronic exhaustion with a nagging suspicion that we lack something other people seem to have in abundance.

We don't want to admit the attack exists or acknowledge that it affects us. It is easier to revert to our favorite childhood solution: if we whistle in the dark loud and long enough, perhaps our nagging, secret fear - the unnamed specter that traces our steps day and night - will just go away!

The assault is too deadly to ignore or dismiss.

This silent shadow seems able to break us down and inspire fear and heartbreaking hopelessness without warning. Perhaps it is the reason behind the treason of Peter in the garden when he denied Jesus. Could this help explain why the once-loving husband and dad meets another woman for lunch at the local bar across town? Is this a dark influence drawing the beloved Sunday school teacher to the adult bookstore night after night?

The assault is too deadly to ignore or dismiss. Someone far wiser than I once explained that "heartache crushes the spirit" (Prov. 15:13 NIV). Today, hard-won experience - suffering - has made me quick to confirm the wisdom of these ancient words.

A Divine Encounter in a Bar

We serve a good and loving God, but in His wisdom He seems to allow things to drop into our laps that shake us to the core. This is exactly how God ignited the fire in me that birthed this book. I'll never forget the divine appointment that diverted me from my scheduled meeting in a restaurant.

I had to walk through a bar area to reach the business luncheon in the back of a restaurant. As I did so, I glanced at the bartender's extremely long beard. (My generation would instantly recognize its similarity to the trademark beards of ZZ Top, an old rock-and-roll band from the 1970s.)

I chuckled and kept walking until I thought about the man's eyes. Something about the man's face seemed familiar. Then it hit me - I knew this bartender. This was a man who had invested in my personal and spiritual life several years earlier. What was he doing behind a bar?

Moved in my spirit, I turned around and walked straight back to him. (Although I'm a Christian and a licensed professional counselor, I'm still known for being a little crazy on occasion.) I bellied up to the bar, crossed my arms, and waited for the bartender to notice me. It didn't take long.

I looked at him and he looked at me. Then I said, "Hey," and he said, "Hey." Once the introductions were over, I tried to zero in and gently ask, "What's up? What are you doing here?"

He said, "I'm getting my stuff together, that's what I'm doing!" (Except he didn't say "stuff.")

I stood silent and he could tell I was still inquisitive in my mind.

"To explain would take more than you've got time for," he said. After that we made small talk and before long, I turned and walked away. I prayed, "Lord, what takes a man like him from fresh faith - a place of closeness with You - to a place like this?"

This was a good man, a very good man, who had taught me about relationships and foundational Scriptures such as: "If any man be in Christ, he is a new creature" (2 Cor. 5:17 KJV) and "Ye are bought with a price: therefore glorify God in your body" (1 Cor. 6:20 KJV). He thought he was getting his life together, but it was obvious he was as lost as a baseball in high weeds. What had happened to him? How did he lose the power he once had in his life? Even more, what is the pathway of recovery? How do people really break free to new life? Or do they?

People are hurting! And the pain is not merely limited to the unsaved masses. Something is seriously wrong in Christian City, and God is ready to fix it. But how?

. . . So began the thinking that led to this book.

Copyright © 2006 by Dr. Tim Clinton

About the Author

Dr. Tim Clinton is president of the American Association of Christian Counselors and publisher of the award-winning Christian Counseling Today magazine. He serves as professor of counseling and pastoral care and executive director of the Liberty University Center for Counseling and Family Studies and was recently a distinguished visiting professor for the Regent University School of Psychology and Counseling. He and his wife, Julie, have two children and live in Forest, Virginia.