Babies - The Power of Positive Suggestions : Bedtime

The Mother and Her Child
by William S. Sadler, M.D., Lena K. Sadler, M.D.

(Page 40 of 43)

Bedtime a Good Time to Suggest

The "going-to-bed time" is the time par excellence for suggestion in early childhood. After the play time, the study time, and the evening story, when all is quiet, in the peacefulness of the darkness, while you are seated in a low chair close beside the little bed, with your hand in his, repeat over and over again the positive suggestions which you desire to take root in the mind and bear fruit in the character. Again and again tell the little fellow that he is the noble and bravest of boys, that he loves truth and hates deceit. No matter what disturbs him, if it is the lessons at school or a wrong habit, first think out exactly what you desire him to be or to do, and firmly, but quietly, tell it over and over to him.

As a concrete example: Suppose Henry, at three-and-a-half years of age has to be coaxed or almost forced to eat. Say to him: "Now, Henry, you are a good little boy. Papa and mamma love you dearly. If you are going to grow up to be a big man you must not forget to eat; so tomorrow when you go down to the table you will eat everything mamma or nurse puts before you. It won't be necessary for papa to feed you at all; you will eat the potatoes, the gravy, the toast, and the cereal, and drink your milk. You will make mamma very happy, and papa will be proud of you; and then after dinner we will have a good romp, and you will soon grow up to be big enough to have a velocipede and a watch." After two or three evenings of this suggestion you will be surprised to see there is a great difference in his eating.

Take the timid little girl who is unable to recite well at school, who is shy, and has great difficulty with her lessons. At the going-to-sleep time sit by the side of her bed and tell her that tomorrow she will have her lessons better, that she will not any more be afraid, that she will get up and recite without the least fear in her heart. By constantly repeating these suggestions she will be given confidence, and in most cases it will result in effecting the deliverance of the child from her bondage to fear.

Never tell her that she is shy or that she cannot do things. Constantly tell her that she is a successful girl with a strong character, and that she is going to make a very useful and courageous woman. Hold high aims and ideals before her. Suggestion cannot atone for all the defects of character which may be inherited, but it can do much to help such unfortunate little ones gracefully bear their burdens.

Never Accuse Children of Dishonesty

Never tell children that you suspect they are dishonest or untruthful. Be very slow to accuse and suspect them of falsehood or theft. Tell them over and over again they are the best boys and girls in the world; that they are going to make the noble of men and women; that they love honesty and truth. Even when you discover them in minor faults do not make the mistake of unduly magnifying and emphasizing the error. As soon as possible direct the thoughts and attention of the wrongdoer away from his error, and focus his thoughts and attention on the high goal you expect him to reach. This will not be construed as doing away with proper punishment for persistent faults after the more ideal methods seem to have failed.

A patient recently called us to see her little girl, and as we made ready to make the examination the mother said: "Now, Mary, stop your playing and come and be undressed and let the doctor look at you."

"I don't want to stop playing," murmured Mary.

"But you must come. You know you don't feel well at all, your cheeks are so red. Now swallow and see if it don't hurt. Now try again. I know you don't feel well." By the time we had begun our examination Mary began to succumb to her mother's suggestions, and began to feel a trifle indisposed. She was being made temporarily ill by the unwise and unfortunate suggestions of the overanxious mother. The examination revealed that there was nothing whatever the matter with her.

It Is Easy to Form Good Habits

Let us get the truth firmly into our minds as parents that it is just about as easy to form a good habit as a bad habit, just about as easy to acquire helpful, happy thoughts as those that are injurious; and we can do it, if we will but see to it that our children early form correct and proper habits of thinking and acting. While the children are taught proper respect for authority, let fear be an unknown word to them. Don't let a thought of the fear of insanity, of haunted houses, of drafts, of this and of that enter into your home. Instead, live in the glorious sunshine of strong, healthy, faith-thought, and a supreme happiness will come into your life, and you will give a legacy to your children for which they will "rise up and call you blessed."

Chivalrous Spirit

The love of mother and sister can naturally and happily be turned early to a chivalrous attitude toward all women when it is developed by suggestion and other training. In giving up a chair or bringing one for a guest, in lifting the hat, in noticing ways to be polite and attentive to mother, a lifelong conduct may be ensured.

Each day gives us trying and sometimes shocking revelations of the prevalent lack of courtesy, or even humanity, on the street cars during the "rush" hours. The indifference to the comfort of women, even the aged, on the part of many men and boys in the matter of giving them seats or other care, indicates a dangerous social condition.

The mother, instead of exercising selfish concern for her boy, should make it her duty very early to suggest that he give his seat to a woman or girl, as he would be glad to have someone do for his mother or sister. Such unselfish service will become a habit of pleasure, and help the boy become a pure-minded, manly gentleman with that respect for womanhood without which a nation is doomed.

About the Author

Dr. William S. Sadler M.D. was a well-known American psychiatrist and college teacher in the school of medicine at the University of Chicago. For over sixty years he practiced his profession in Chicago, thirty-three years being associated in practice with his wife, Dr Lena Kellogg Sadler. The doctors were pioneers in the research on the mysterious Urantia Papers.